What do you and your spouse talk about? Do together?
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Anonymous
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We’re 60 with 2 teens still in our house. I dread when they leave, as much as I can’t wait for them to go.
We have nothing to talk about with each other; I even find I don’t want to talk to him overall. He has no interests and doesn’t want to do anything. Not even watch a television shoe together. |
Anonymous
| What did you used to do together? |
Anonymous
| Teens in the house. We don't do a whole lot together to be honest. Very different interests. |
Anonymous
OP it’s fine that you have different interests but you have to find something that works for you both. My DH and I in similar situation are taking up pickleball. Cliche, I know, but it’s working. |
Anonymous
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Dh and I watch shows together, we talk about current events; we talk about vacations we will never take or a house we may never buy. He’s my best friend, we talk about so much.
This is a good time to start finding common ground. Join clubs together, ballroom dance, something. |
Anonymous
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We talk about the news a lot. We often read the same book at the same time and discuss as we go. We talk about sex (and sometimes we even *have* sex but not as much as I’d like.)
We run errands together. A nice weekend might include a walk to the hardware store where we crack each other up coming up with novel uses for various tools and implements (not gonna lie, butts feature frequently. We can be terribly juvenile.) We received a weirdly large Lego model for Christmas and built it together over several evenings. (No idea what we’re going to do with the completed project.) We played a lot of board games with the kids during the pandemic but honestly it’s not my favorite and we’ve mostly dropped it. We watch tv and movies together, then talk about them throughout the next day. We go out to movies and sometimes concerts, but we’re getting a little old to stand for 3 hours in 110 decibels. We send each other memes and videos and articles a dozen times a day. Sometimes we just snuggle up each with our own device. Sometimes with kids and/or pets. We take mini trips. Max 3 hour drive, one night in a hotel, taking turns DJing on the drive. Or listening to a podcast if he’s driving. (If I’m driving he falls asleep the instant it starts 😂) We cook together almost every night, usually with a glass of wine and some music. Umm… I think that’s most of it! |
Anonymous
| We go for walks together everyday. Gives us an opportunity to connect. |
Anonymous
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Try to do new things together, even if they don’t stick.
For us, it’s walking every day together, reading the same books, watching shows together, and gossiping about family and neighbors. It sounds like you two just need to figure out how to be friends with each other again, |
Anonymous
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We watch a few shows together. Honestly, years of being the one who manages our life have left me too resentful to want to be friends with him.
And yes, I have tried to talk to him about it, but he’s defensive, so screw it. He can just spend the rest of his life with someone who doesn’t enjoy being around him much. |
Anonymous
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Why don’t you experiment now with going out to a movie and dinner?
See the movie first so you can talk about it at dinner. |
Anonymous
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What have you talked about/enjoyed together in the past?
We’re both very independent people with differing interests but we find ways to connect: **eating at new restaurants **trying shows/movies we both like (this is a challenge b/c we have different tastes but we keep trying) **travel **listen to and suggest music to each other **we’ve started baking together which has been fun **go out with couple friends We entertained for the first 20+ years together but I got burned out and the pandemic gave me a chance to give it up |