Real conversations with our elders

[Anonymous]

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/12/22/style/modern-love-christmas-grayspeak-grandmother-possibility.html?mwgrp=a-dbar&unlocked_article_code=1.H00.U0UX.4UxhzdRux_OK&smid=url-share

I loved this essay. I would like to do better in conversations with my mother, and this is food for thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nytimes.com/2023/12/22/style/modern-love-christmas-grayspeak-grandmother-possibility.html?mwgrp=a-dbar&unlocked_article_code=1.H00.U0UX.4UxhzdRux_OK&smid=url-share

I loved this essay. I would like to do better in conversations with my mother, and this is food for thought.

Very nice—thank you!

(So many people lose sight of the unique individual who resides in that aging body)

[Anonymous]

After one parent is gone, in many cases the timing is right to get to know the surviving elder on a more personal basis. My Mom talked a lot more about her life as a independent young woman and life before my Father.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nytimes.com/2023/12/22/style/modern-love-christmas-grayspeak-grandmother-possibility.html?mwgrp=a-dbar&unlocked_article_code=1.H00.U0UX.4UxhzdRux_OK&smid=url-share

I loved this essay. I would like to do better in conversations with my mother, and this is food for thought.

Aw great share OP. Thanks 🙏🏻

My grandma used to talk about the oranges too, reading this made me miss her. ❤️

I'm going to tell my kids about this.

[Anonymous]

Why would anyone talk down to elders? The whole article seems to come from someone who feels they are intellectually superior and pride themselves on reaching what is an obvious conclusion - treat people as you wish to be treated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After one parent is gone, in many cases the timing is right to get to know the surviving elder on a more personal basis. My Mom talked a lot more about her life as a independent young woman and life before my Father.

My mother died first, and had no time as an independent young woman before my father. She met him at 16 and married at 19. My father has nothing interesting to say. I tried to become closer with him, but he's always been a brick wall and nothing has changed sadly.

[Anonymous]

I remember working in the summer with my grandfather who was in his 80’s. I’d have lunch with him in his office and we’d just talk about everything and nothing. But I wasn’t smart enough to ask him about his experiences at my age or during WWI or the Depression.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I remember working in the summer with my grandfather who was in his 80’s. I’d have lunch with him in his office and we’d just talk about everything and nothing. But I wasn’t smart enough to ask him about his experiences at my age or during WWI or the Depression.

Many people of that time didn’t want to revisit those memories. My best friend in school had grandparents who survived the Nazi camps and they wouldn’t entertain any questions about that period of their lives.