feeling very foolish

[Anonymous]

My team lead has been rude and disrespectful to me for months now. She made some crude comments and was rude to me even before a new team member. Team lead also has a favorite and all my work's credit is usually given to lead's favorite. I requested to be moved to a different project and will soon move out of this team. New team member is my back-fill and I have been sharing knowledge with her about the project during the transition period. She observed the team's interactions and reached out and sympathized with me. I trusted this new team member and shared a lot of things and how I feel in this team. Recently, I am noticing the new team member's tone and attitude changed and she is just taking advantage of the situation.

I regret confiding in the new team member. Sadly this is not my first job and I am at an associate level at work. I feel like a fool.

[Anonymous]

Well, you've learned your lesson haven't you? Do not share negative views of others and/or their work at work. Certainly not with new people.

[Anonymous]

I have been you, OP. It really is a bummer.

I’ve learned to keep my head down and only speak positives at work. Work is not where I have been able to find friends, unfortunately.

Hopefully you will be moved to a new team in 2024 and can start fresh.

[Anonymous]

You learned a hard lesson but think of it this way, you learned something valuable about your new coworker - she can’t be trusted. That is good to know now early on so that you will know how to deal with her moving forward. Also, since you are likely to move on to a new job soon, you shouldn’t have to deal with this wrong.

[Anonymous]

That sucks OP. Sorry to hear it. It's a hard lesson to learn, but you really need to be cautious about what you share.

[Anonymous]

Also consider, if everyone seems to behave the same way, what you might change about yourself that maybe triggers that attitude.