1st world problems but why can’t I ever get a nice gift
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Anonymous
| 23 years and two kids and I can count on one hand, the number of nice gifts. My 44th birthday and I asked for a gold paperclip chain…I received one but it’s freaking shitty costume. Last year it was nothing. I’m literally the mom with the empty stocking. I don’t always go all out but generally buy nice gifts. I gave him a Longine watch last year. I’m next expecting anything crazy but a 14k gold necklace isn’t above our means. Except for wedding and engagement, I buy all of my own nice items. I know I should just give up but it makes me feel like shit. |
Anonymous
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My daughter sent me a presentation with items she wants including sizes, colors, prices, and links to them. As a result, she's going to be happy come gift opening times.
Don't expect people to read your mind. Send them links to stuff you want. Ask them to buy you one or more of them. Then you'll hopefully get something you like and want. |
Anonymous
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yeah, I think you need to be more specific. RE the jewelry. Your DH was probably like "Oh, here's exactly what she wants and I'm so smart buying this bargain one", totally not thinking through what the difference was between the real thing and a cheap knock off. My DH also does stuff like that so usually I either tell him I don't want anything, and just shop for myself, or I send him a specific link and tell him I've already researched it and need that exact thing.
It's frustrating, but at some point I just gave up. |
Anonymous
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I would not want my husband picking out an expensive piece of gold jewelry like a paper clip chain.
The great joy of being an adult is buying what you want when you want it. |
Anonymous
| I thinks it’s the fact that he will spend on nice things for himself, bought a 10 year old $300 catchers gear and gave me a $30 necklace. |
Anonymous
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Sorry op but this isn’t about the gifts. You’re feeling unappreciated in other ways and/or aren’t happy about other things.
My Dh is a very sentimental gift giver but most of his gifts are awful or just plain weird (I got a Godzilla eating lawn gnomes…). I’ve tried not exchanging gifts, but he likes to and my parents thought that was terrible of him not to give me a gift even when I didn’t want one. So I either give him a specific list. Or better yet, I buy it for myself and just hand him the box when it arrives in the mail (I don’t open the outer package). This year it’s the Chanel ballet flats that will be mine Christmas morning. |
Anonymous
I assume the 10 year old plays baseball and needed specific equipment. |
Anonymous
OP should buy you BetterHelp. |
Anonymous
| Sorry OP, it’s pretty lousy you aren’t getting more thoughtful and nice gifts at least once in awhile. |
Anonymous
| You want some whine with that cheese…? Get your own gift and call it a day. |
Anonymous
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I buy my own 1-2 presents and put them in my stocking and under the tree. And I buy books for everyone and they are not for Santa so we all have something to read and so my kids know that I’m making some of the fun happen.
There are two people in the whole world who buy me good presents- my aunt-in-law and my best friend from college. That’s more than most people and I am very happy to have them in my life. Because my DH basically panics and goes into shutdown mode for my bday and Christmas, I am good about buying myself what I want at random times during the year. I don’t wait for him to figure it out or get it right, so I got myself a paper clip bracelet last spring and a not-ridiculously-expensive tennis bracelet in October and both have made me very happy and now I have them in time to wear to dressy holiday events. Treat yo’self, OP. And if you don’t understand that reference, we need to catch you up and set a treat yo’self day for you. |
Anonymous
| I gave up and buy my own gifts or send links to exactly what I want. It's better than being disappointed but I feel you - I wish my dh could just get it together for a nice gift 2 or 3x a year |
Anonymous
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I agree that sending your hubby a few links are a great idea.
And I totally empathize your desire for receiving a nice gift 🎁. Nice gifts make us feel good in general. If your husband is not only a great husband to you but also a wonderful Father to your child(ren) then be grateful that you are so blessed because not everyone has a person like this in their life. And that is worth so much more than a $300 bracelet! |
Anonymous
Are you 80? Who still says that? What’s next, “bye Felicia?” 
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Anonymous
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I get it. When someone gets you a good gift (not an expensive gift, a good gift) it makes you feel like they understand you and have thought about what you would like.
I’ve been happily married to my wonderful husband for 20 years, but he has given me nothing for several gift giving occasions, and given me just terrible gifts for others. I sat him down after an occasion where he got me nothing and told him how much it made me feel unappreciated. He legitimately thought that I didn’t need or want anything. I told him that I wanted/needed to feel appreciated, valued, and seen. I explained that I expected a gift only three times a year (birthday, Christmas, and Mother’s Day). That I didn’t need anything for our anniversary or valentines. He created a repeating reminder on his calendar for a month before those three events. And he created a notes app list where he keeps ideas or suggestions I mention. It has been a 100% turn around since we sat down and had an actual conversation about gifts. Please do this. Communicate with your husband. |