Is being asked to coordinate staff events a red flag?

[Anonymous]

Just need to see if I’m being unreasonable or not.

I’m in kind of a rut at work - transitioned to this department about a year and a half ago and it is not a natural fit, although I’m trying. Everyone is extremely busy and frankly the culture kind of sucks, which higher ups are trying to remedy by having monthly(ish) gatherings.

I was tapped to plan and execute these events, which I’m okay to do, but I have to say, it feels a bit sexist (I’m a woman - about 80% of our group are men.) The more I think about it the more uncomfortable I am with this: isn’t this an administrative task? Yes, I’m chatty and outgoing but this just doesn’t seem pertinent.

Is this weird or am I overthinking it?

[Anonymous]

You’re overthinking it. It sounds like a good match for your skills and personality so lean into it this year. But, only one year. Make it clear that you want the torch to be passed next year. It is additive to workload, a compliment to be trusted with it, yes administrative but not hugely burdensome, and a nice chance for others on the team to step up. Knock it out of the park, you’ll set the precedence OP.

[Anonymous]

Or that you're one of the few people with social skills if this is engineering or tech. Not to say it isn't also sexist. I think you'd have a hard time pushing back because you said you don't fit in though.

[Anonymous]

Yes

If an org wants an event planned, hire an event planner or hire someone on short term contract to do it

Op - you should be out interviewing and looking to leave asap

[Anonymous]

Do it and act like it's any other assignment.

But analyze what's going on in the next few months. If after a while you sense you are being relegated to b.s. work and marginalized, start looking for a new job. If it's just another task and it has no other meaning, boss will appreciate you doing it without complaining.

I was once given "make-work" type of assistants at a job and could feel it was time to go, so I did.

I've also been a boss and appreciated the employee who would do whatever I asked (and of course it was all above board). Too many people object or need hand-holding before taking on things they are asked to do and often as a manager you just want someone to do something without a lot of analysis.

But pay attention to how much else you are asked to do and how much you are respected but it could mean nothing.

[Anonymous]

They absolutely asked you because you're a woman. I'd agree to do X amount more of them, as being a team player, then ask for a transition to another member of the team. Or suggest everyone do 1x/year or whatever.

[Anonymous]

We usually ask for volunteers. So many of us like helping to plan these kinds of things.

When I was in my 20s I got tasked with months work of filing for the office. We were placed in a room with tons and tons of files. Only women got this wonderful job. My colleague and I had law degrees and the men who weren't chosen had BA degrees. Now that was sexist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re overthinking it. It sounds like a good match for your skills and personality so lean into it this year. But, only one year. Make it clear that you want the torch to be passed next year. It is additive to workload, a compliment to be trusted with it, yes administrative but not hugely burdensome, and a nice chance for others on the team to step up. Knock it out of the park, you’ll set the precedence OP.

spoken like a man

[Anonymous]

If your spidey sense tells you that it's weird, then it probably is.

[Anonymous]

Events like what? New employee orientation could be a chance to shine and improve systems. If you mean birthday parties, f that.

[Anonymous]

This is OP. I know it’s time for me to go - they’re unwilling to provide me formal training and what I do is extremely, extremely specific and I am not looped in to anything new or outside of this one specific realm. That being said, I executed the first event last month, which went well. I’m planning an “all hands” luncheon after the start of the new year.

But yeah, it’s not a good fit and it probably never will be.

[Anonymous]

Yep, they asked you bc you are a woman. I’d do it for one month and then say someone else needs to step up to plan future gatherings.

[Anonymous]

Let me guess most of your coworkers are men with sahm/ teach type wives? I would get out of there asap OP!

[Anonymous]

Teacher not teach

[Anonymous]

Agree this is because you're a woman. If you were staying, I'd suggest you write up a how-to and get management buy-in on a rotation so everybody takes a turn.