Strict elementary school rules

[Anonymous]

I have had kids in our current elementary school for over 5 years. We’ve seen a lot of changes over the past few years that to me, seem strict and unnecessary.

Some examples include, assigned seating at lunch (not just table, but actual seat), no going home with friends on other busses, ended Halloween parade/celebration, and more recently no playing tag or two touch football at recess because they don’t want students to “touch each other”.

Am I alone in thinking this is a little strict and excessive?

[Anonymous]

No touch has been normal for years, same with halloween parties as not everyone celebrates halloween and I can understand no going home on other buses as too much possibility for issues.

[Anonymous]

I can’t speak to your particular school, but sadly these rules tend to happen because many kids massively misbehave. So it’s possible that kids playing touch football ended up getting in fights, or kids at lunch tables ended up shouting and throwing food. People think they know their kids but they can’t imagine how they act in large groups.

[Anonymous]

Our school went to assigned seating for certain grades after a lot of thought and warnings. Kids were throwing food and jumping on tables. Many parents supported this but it was only temporary.

It's disappointing about Halloween but it really depends on the school community. I don't think you can fault admin for choosing not to allow it if that's what everyone wants. If you think your community would support having Halloween celebrations then you can organize parents to ask that it be reinstated.

Our school also banned touch football after some kids were too rough and got into fights.

Are some of these changes holdovers from last year when they had problems?

[Anonymous]

No friends on buses is usually due to overcrowded buses. DC was at a school that had that policy and it was three to a seat all the time and sometimes kids had to stand or even sit in the aisles which I'm not sure is allowed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t speak to your particular school, but sadly these rules tend to happen because many kids massively misbehave. So it’s possible that kids playing touch football ended up getting in fights, or kids at lunch tables ended up shouting and throwing food. People think they know their kids but they can’t imagine how they act in large groups.

This. I did lunch duty before and after Covid and the difference is huge. Kids do not care about respecting the adults in charge of them anymore and there are no repercussions allowed at school and nothing being done at home. The number of kids who can't sit down for the 20 minutes they get to eat and get up repeatedly despite being asked to sit is astounding. They make a huge mess and are shocked when we point it out and ask them to clean up.

I agree school isn't as fun anymore, but part of that is the shift in parenting....it may be easier for you in the moment to let things slide instead of being consistent about behavior, or giving your kids a screen instead of teaching them that being bored at the store or in a restaurant is okay and they can still behave, but long term? It's messing up your kids and a lot of others as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t speak to your particular school, but sadly these rules tend to happen because many kids massively misbehave. So it’s possible that kids playing touch football ended up getting in fights, or kids at lunch tables ended up shouting and throwing food. People think they know their kids but they can’t imagine how they act in large groups.

This. I did lunch duty before and after Covid and the difference is huge. Kids do not care about respecting the adults in charge of them anymore and there are no repercussions allowed at school and nothing being done at home. The number of kids who can't sit down for the 20 minutes they get to eat and get up repeatedly despite being asked to sit is astounding. They make a huge mess and are shocked when we point it out and ask them to clean up.

I agree school isn't as fun anymore, but part of that is the shift in parenting....it may be easier for you in the moment to let things slide instead of being consistent about behavior, or giving your kids a screen instead of teaching them that being bored at the store or in a restaurant is okay and they can still behave, but long term? It's messing up your kids and a lot of others as well.

+1 That’s a great observation. My DH is surprised by how many parents let their kids behave so wildly, and apparently for years they have been mistreating a specials teacher they didn’t like. I wasn’t aware until a parent thought the teacher was in the wrong, but after further discussion, it became clear to me the students were awful. Just because you don’t like the teacher doesn’t mean you can deliberately be obstructive. They were ganging up on her and she was losing her cool unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Did Halloween celebrations end at all schools? It's certainly not happening at my DC's school.

I like the idea of a storybook parade that happens in other states. It gives the kids the opportunity to dress up and do something different for the day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t speak to your particular school, but sadly these rules tend to happen because many kids massively misbehave. So it’s possible that kids playing touch football ended up getting in fights, or kids at lunch tables ended up shouting and throwing food. People think they know their kids but they can’t imagine how they act in large groups.

This. I did lunch duty before and after Covid and the difference is huge. Kids do not care about respecting the adults in charge of them anymore and there are no repercussions allowed at school and nothing being done at home. The number of kids who can't sit down for the 20 minutes they get to eat and get up repeatedly despite being asked to sit is astounding. They make a huge mess and are shocked when we point it out and ask them to clean up.

I agree school isn't as fun anymore, but part of that is the shift in parenting....it may be easier for you in the moment to let things slide instead of being consistent about behavior, or giving your kids a screen instead of teaching them that being bored at the store or in a restaurant is okay and they can still behave, but long term? It's messing up your kids and a lot of others as well.

Screens are a cancer...in 2015 i went for a nature walk with a friend. I had an infant and she had an 18 month old toddler. We were pushing our buggies and before we even set off she planted her phone in front of her child with one of those Baby Bum videos. Why would you need to amuse your kid before he had even started fussing? He could have just zoned out and looked at his surroundings. Now these kids are in elementary school and bored constantly.

[Anonymous]

Touch football too often turns into trip or tackle football. Fields are rock hard clay, especially this year. Let 'em play soccer (and just elbow each other).

Lunch seating usually gets assigned when certain kids have trouble sitting next to certain other kids without escalating.

These are normal consequences to kids having trouble finding the proper limits themselves.

Bus stuff for a variety of reasons - lost kids, full buses, etc.

[Anonymous]

Our principal canceled Halloween parade according to him many families can’t celebrate this holiday. Now PTA took over as a separate event, and some neighboring elementary schools also do the trunk or treat or a costume party to families who want to dress up. I think it’s fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did Halloween celebrations end at all schools? It's certainly not happening at my DC's school.

I like the idea of a storybook parade that happens in other states. It gives the kids the opportunity to dress up and do something different for the day.

No, some schools still have them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t speak to your particular school, but sadly these rules tend to happen because many kids massively misbehave. So it’s possible that kids playing touch football ended up getting in fights, or kids at lunch tables ended up shouting and throwing food. People think they know their kids but they can’t imagine how they act in large groups.

This. I did lunch duty before and after Covid and the difference is huge. Kids do not care about respecting the adults in charge of them anymore and there are no repercussions allowed at school and nothing being done at home. The number of kids who can't sit down for the 20 minutes they get to eat and get up repeatedly despite being asked to sit is astounding. They make a huge mess and are shocked when we point it out and ask them to clean up.

I agree school isn't as fun anymore, but part of that is the shift in parenting....it may be easier for you in the moment to let things slide instead of being consistent about behavior, or giving your kids a screen instead of teaching them that being bored at the store or in a restaurant is okay and they can still behave, but long term? It's messing up your kids and a lot of others as well.

Screens are a cancer...in 2015 i went for a nature walk with a friend. I had an infant and she had an 18 month old toddler. We were pushing our buggies and before we even set off she planted her phone in front of her child with one of those Baby Bum videos. Why would you need to amuse your kid before he had even started fussing? He could have just zoned out and looked at his surroundings. Now these kids are in elementary school and bored constantly.

Screens are fine. Lax parenting and teachers/admin are the issue.

[Anonymous]

My DCPS elementary school in the 1980s didn’t allow touch football.

Assigned seating doesn’t seem like such a bad thing, since figuring out where to sit for lunch can cause a lot of social angst. I do think they should shift who sits where though so kids can meet more people.

The bus thing could be logistical. What if the bus is too crowded.