Please help us understand the youth sports culture in the US

[Anonymous]

My spouse and I are immigrants and don’t understand the obsession with youth sports in the US. We have 2 kids: one is naturally athletically gifted and the other , not so much, but is very academically competitive .

We were surprised when our not so athletic child was waitlisted at several high schools who accepted other kids in his class who had lower grades and lower standardized test scores but were good athletes.

I understand these kids will get recruited by good colleges and make the schools look good.

But what’s the end game ? If it’s a college scholarship, the math doesn’t add up. By the time, one pays for years of coaching and travel to get to the level where their child can be recruited, they could have easily saved that money over the years and paid for a college tuition.

Is it to keep kids out of trouble /boost their confidence/ stay healthy/ make friends with similar interests ? If so, why practice sports which such intensity , travel for tournaments, risk burning the child out …

This is a genuine question and not intended to throw shade at anything or anyone. We are simply trying to understand the culture better.

[Anonymous]

OP, it's you who is being extreme. "Obsessed", the use of that word. Believing you know all about other students and their academic qualifications.

[Anonymous]

Schools are looking for well-rounded kids. Maybe your academic child seemed less well-rounded.

[Anonymous]

Another immigrant here. It is hard to understand! Sports, played at any level, seem to be prized above all other things, and that is just the culture here.

[Anonymous]

Academics at any private high school worth applying to 100% outweigh sports. You are looking for a reason that your kid got rejected and want to blame sports. Your child may seem to you to be more intelligent than other children who got in but I would have to ask: 1) why do you think you know how smart any other kid is? 2) Do you know anything else about those children who were chosen over yours? What are their interests, their drives, their personalities? I would guess that your child does not seem to have the same characteristics that matter more to the school. Most of them want students who can not only do well academically but also contribute positively to the life of the school. This does usually mean having interests outside of class. This shows they have grit and stamina and can do the work while also having a life. Please stop assuming athletic kids are dumb. That would be a good lesson to teach both your "gifted" athlete and your smart kid.
Signed,
Mom of a kid who was recruited to multiple Ivy league schools for his sport and performs in the classroom wonderfully (and is a really nice young man who cares about the world)

[Anonymous]

Our teen is on a travel sports team for the simple reason that she would do nothing but stare at her phone throughout her waking hours not spent in school if it wasn't for her sport. It gets her out of the house, it's fun to go watch games, it's her only hobby. Travel sports also come with the benefits of exercise, getting some sunshine and making friends.

[Anonymous]

Immigrant mom nerd here.

The sports thing is multifaceted. They want kids that value a community and team work but they also want kids that can be newsworthy.

Smart kids are great. Maybe your kid will win the National spelling bee- but that’s even more highly unlikely than a kid winning state championships. And that’s what really places private schools- making championships and getting sponsors. And it’s hard to do!

So think of it from the schools perspective. There aren’t that many Regeneron like competitions locally and they don’t get a lot of coverage. But having the best baseball team or football team is easier to do because there are state and division level competitions that get press coverage. Which leads to sponsorships local and otherwise.

So those kids get priority. The majority of them are also going to be pretty good students too.

[Anonymous]

Immigrant mom nerd again:

The other thing is that the schools know these kids have very supportive and wealthy parents if they are in travel sports.

It’s is very very very time consuming to do these sports and it takes a ton of money (hotels every weekend for games sometimes) and a ton of time management from the parents and the kids. Do not assume these kids are “dumb athletes” - they probably would do as well as your kid in school if they weren’t at practice 3 hours a day.

So it’s not just that your kid got passed over because they weren’t sporty. It’s because if they are in travel sports (which kinda needs to happen to even get onto high school teams now) they are wealthy, very involved parents. It might not appear that way, but my experience we are talking 7 figures in secret.

[Anonymous]

NP. The answer is straightforward. In college, athletes do better financially on average after graduation and they donate more. Academically, especially at competitive schools, they aren’t as good on average as the very top academic students but they aren’t far behind and hold their own academically, while also playing their sport at a very high level. Essentially, they launch successfully out of college at a higher rate than the rest of the student population and so bring more money back.

High schools recognize this so the competitive ones recruit athletes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. The answer is straightforward. In college, athletes do better financially on average after graduation and they donate more. Academically, especially at competitive schools, they aren’t as good on average as the very top academic students but they aren’t far behind and hold their own academically, while also playing their sport at a very high level. Essentially, they launch successfully out of college at a higher rate than the rest of the student population and so bring more money back.

High schools recognize this so the competitive ones recruit athletes.

Can you please post some sources for this? i’ve read many articles stating the exact opposite. Only 2% of college athletes go pro and many have difficulty transitioning post-grad to life outside of sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. The answer is straightforward. In college, athletes do better financially on average after graduation and they donate more. Academically, especially at competitive schools, they aren’t as good on average as the very top academic students but they aren’t far behind and hold their own academically, while also playing their sport at a very high level. Essentially, they launch successfully out of college at a higher rate than the rest of the student population and so bring more money back.

This. Athletes are leaders. They also are well rounded and disciplined. Good at time management. A good athlete will bring money to universities.

In addition:

Think about it. In a modern workforce TEAMS get it done. We could have funded a small African nation’s defense budget with our soccer expenditure but it isn’t really for the soccer - it’s for the training she would only receive in a high level corporation a decade later. I do not know a single D1 athlete who did not end up at 6 figures (or higher).

Colleges recognize this so the competitive ones recruit athletes. The nerds in short are not really worth much in aggregate. They are likely selected much like a lotto ticket. 1 out of million might end up as Zuck.

It must be hard to accept but universities are businesses here and fundraising is their sales. Athletes are key to the system.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. The answer is straightforward. In college, athletes do better financially on average after graduation and they donate more. Academically, especially at competitive schools, they aren’t as good on average as the very top academic students but they aren’t far behind and hold their own academically, while also playing their sport at a very high level. Essentially, they launch successfully out of college at a higher rate than the rest of the student population and so bring more money back.

High schools recognize this so the competitive ones recruit athletes.

Can you please post some sources for this? i’ve read many articles stating the exact opposite. Only 2% of college athletes go pro and many have difficulty transitioning post-grad to life outside of sports.

For women

https://www.thestreet.com/csuiteadvisors/stories/c-suite-contributor-lisa-strasman-women-in-sports-better-leaders

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Immigrant mom nerd again:

The other thing is that the schools know these kids have very supportive and wealthy parents if they are in travel sports.

It’s is very very very time consuming to do these sports and it takes a ton of money (hotels every weekend for games sometimes) and a ton of time management from the parents and the kids. Do not assume these kids are “dumb athletes” - they probably would do as well as your kid in school if they weren’t at practice 3 hours a day.

So it’s not just that your kid got passed over because they weren’t sporty. It’s because if they are in travel sports (which kinda needs to happen to even get onto high school teams now) they are wealthy, very involved parents. It might not appear that way, but my experience we are talking 7 figures in secret.

NP. The bolded is making the point it's tdying to debunk.
If my kid spends 3 hours a day deep diving into a brainy academic topic (well, when not if), they grow smarter than yours, every time. Sprinkle on top some rec level sports and they are well-rounded and healthy.

OP is absolutely right that it's an American cultural quirk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My spouse and I are immigrants and don’t understand the obsession with youth sports in the US. We have 2 kids: one is naturally athletically gifted and the other , not so much, but is very academically competitive .

We were surprised when our not so athletic child was waitlisted at several high schools who accepted other kids in his class who had lower grades and lower standardized test scores but were good athletes.

I understand these kids will get recruited by good colleges and make the schools look good.

But what’s the end game ? If it’s a college scholarship, the math doesn’t add up. By the time, one pays for years of coaching and travel to get to the level where their child can be recruited, they could have easily saved that money over the years and paid for a college tuition.

Is it to keep kids out of trouble /boost their confidence/ stay healthy/ make friends with similar interests ? If so, why practice sports which such intensity , travel for tournaments, risk burning the child out …

This is a genuine question and not intended to throw shade at anything or anyone. We are simply trying to understand the culture better.

It’s hard for the parents involved to see your point of view because they don’t know anything else, but it’s valid and it’s all true.

[Anonymous]

I can answer this one:

Large high schools. And few athletic opportunities for anyone who does not make high school teams.

My kids are involved in sports, and I can’t think of many parents who are expecting scholarships, or for their kids to play in college at all.

Most parents want their kids to have a shot at playing a sport in high school, however…and many or most of those require years of travel experience prior to high school- soccer, lacrosse, baseball, softball, volleyball for sure. Football and basketball don’t- but tend to require a certain size or physique (eliminating many kids). Sports like golf, tennis, swim usually require years of advanced training also.

It doesn’t leave many options for the rest. Just cross country or track and field.

It isn’t about college scholarships for most- it is more about making high school teams.

Why do people want their kids to play on high school teams? To have focus, a social group, productive way to spend free time, something to put on college apps. Obviously there are other extracurricular avenues- but sports are a big one for sure.

If there were more high school teams (A & B teams etc) or recreational/intramural /non school league options I think you’d see some of the crazy youth sports focus dwindle.