Poll: Wedding gift amount - spending a fortune to attend!

[Anonymous]

It’s been absolutely forever since I’ve attended a wedding…would appreciate advice on how much I am expected to pay for a gift. This is a second wedding for our friend and we have already purchased flights in addition to $1000 (it’s a ridiculously fancy location) on lodging plus a car rental! I suppose I’m more of the mindset that our presence is their present - but I won’t be a total jerk. Any advice? Thanks!!!

[Anonymous]

$100 and a card

[Anonymous]

I would just give what you normally give unless you can’t afford to, in which case adjust accordingly

[Anonymous]

I'd think it's fair not to give a gift. It's a second wedding, you're already paying a large sum for lodgings and hotels and car rental plus food outside the wedding. A card is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just give what you normally give unless you can’t afford to, in which case adjust accordingly

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd think it's fair not to give a gift. It's a second wedding, you're already paying a large sum for lodgings and hotels and car rental plus food outside the wedding. A card is fine.

No, no, no. In theory, yes, sure, they shouldn’t be expecting a gift and you’re not required to give one. But in actuality, of course you give a gift unless you can’t afford it, but if you can afford to go at those prices, you can afford a gift. Second wedding part is irrelevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$100 and a card

+1

[Anonymous]

Op - here. Thanks! Would $100 total cover the cost of the gift from me and my husband?

[Anonymous]

$250

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op - here. Thanks! Would $100 total cover the cost of the gift from me and my husband?

No, I don’t think so.

[Anonymous]

Second wedding - meh. Your presence is their present.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you shouldn’t have agreed to go.

[Anonymous]

What can you afford? $100-200.

[Anonymous]

We went to my cousin’s destination wedding. It cost over $5000 for just my DH and I since we had to stay at the fancy resort where the ceremony was being held. The couple had a small registry because my aunt pestered them but they said gifts were not expected. I bought a $100 item off their list.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op - here. Thanks! Would $100 total cover the cost of the gift from me and my husband?

No, I don’t think so.

Yes, of course. Presumably they invited you to share in their joy, not as a gift grab.