Food demands when helping out a friend?

[Anonymous]

I’m watching a classmate/sort of friend of DS after school this week, while his mother attends to some appointments with her parent. It’s been planned for a week. All of a sudden I just received a text that this boy is a picky eater, and can I have specific snacks available so he can eat after school! I’m a bit astounded. I don’t mind providing snacks, but I’m not being paid by this mom, I’m just being kind, and this just feels audacious! Of course I will stop on my way home and grab him something so he doesn’t go hungry, but how would you handle this tonight? Mom is dealing with a lot of stress, so I don’t want to pile it on. But it’s like, pack a snack? Throw me some cash? What should I say?

[Anonymous]

I don’t have that available and don’t think I’ll have a chance to get to the store. Would you please send him with a snack (or the week’s snacks on the first day). Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have that available and don’t think I’ll have a chance to get to the store. Would you please send him with a snack (or the week’s snacks on the first day). Thanks!

+1

That’s what I would do.

[Anonymous]

What snacks is she asking for?
I do think it’s kind of presumptuous for her to ask. I like to offer options to guests but it would be from what we consider snacks in our house. I’m not buying a bottle of Oreos for someone else’s kid to eat after school.

[Anonymous]

She will probably offer to reimburse you when she picks him up and expect you to decline any payment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have that available and don’t think I’ll have a chance to get to the store. Would you please send him with a snack (or the week’s snacks on the first day). Thanks!

+1

That’s what I would do.

PP just to add - the timing would bother me much more than the request. I go grocery shopping on Thursday. I’m not making a special trip for your kid. If I’d known before Thursday, I would have been happy to buy some snacks for the kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have that available and don’t think I’ll have a chance to get to the store. Would you please send him with a snack (or the week’s snacks on the first day). Thanks!

This was my suggestion, but if you’re going to the store anyway, just grab the snacks. What difference does it make? If he ate your regular snacks, you’d have to replenish them sooner than you otherwise would, so there’s no real doerence unless the snacks are obscenely expensive or hard to find.

I would never ask for cash unless the expense actually impacted my life.

[Anonymous]

Wow. I'd write back and say we don't have any [whatever the requested snack was] right now, but he is welcome to bring a snack or I can offer him choice from what we do have. Seriously. If he won't eat anything you have, he will not starve to death. Also, plenty of picky kids are remarkably less picky at someone else's house. I have a really picky kid and I would never ask this of you in a million years. If this kid literally only eats one snack, THEY HAVE IT WELL STOCKED AT THEIR HOUSE!!! So he should bring it with him. There is no way I would go buy this form the store. You are doing more than enough.

[Anonymous]

I would just get the snacks, then be very wary about agreeing to do favors in the future.

[Anonymous]

She must be really stressed, or she's just kind of a crap parent. Because I have a picky eater and it is EASIER to pack food for her to take somewhere than to try and give someone instructions on what she'll eat and hope they get it right. Even if I said "she'll always eat peanut butter and jelly," the truth is that she will even reject that if the bread is too dark or they try to serve her natural peanut butter or grape jelly.

My kid has never gone to someone else's house for any reason without a lunchbox with food for her in it that I know she'll eat. She's gotten a little less picky in the last year or so, but I still send it "in case of emergencies" because I don't want anyone dealing with my hangry kid, and I also don't want my kid sitting their starving because the food doesn't look or taste right to her.

But I guess if I had a sick parent and was super stressed and panicking, maybe I'd... nope, I'd still pack my kid food because, again, trying to explain to someone what my kid will and won't eat would be MORE stressful than just going to the grocery store on Sunday night and packing snacks for my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have that available and don’t think I’ll have a chance to get to the store. Would you please send him with a snack (or the week’s snacks on the first day). Thanks!

+1

That’s what I would do.

Me too.

[Anonymous]

I would cut the other parent some slack if her life is chaotic right now, OP. What she should have done is brought you the snacks, but she's stressed out, so...

I would buy some of the requested items, but try him on your usual food, since this is not an allergy or food intolerance situation. Monitor how he does. If he has a reaction or literally does not eating anything at all, then yes, you do need to feed him what he's used to. One of my children has food intolerances, including a lactose intolerance, but it's really hard to identify the other foods that make her cramp and have diarrhea. You don't want to make him suffer either.

[Anonymous]

Oh hell no, so rude. Pack the desired snacks with your kid, lady.

[Anonymous]

I would cut her a break if she is typically a solid friend/neighbor...but it is really an annoying request. Has this kid been to your house before? Have there been any eating issues?

[Anonymous]

Another vote to tell her you won’t be able to get to the store and to send him with whatever snacks he specifically wants. Otherwise, he is welcome to eat what is in your house