What does “know your worth” mean and how do you make someone realize it?

[Anonymous]

Everyone always says “know your worth”. In regards to dating, “make a man know your worth” etc. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. What does that mean to you? How do you not let a man determine your worth? What does it actually mean and please give me examples. Please give me stories/examples/everything because I don’t think I know what I’m doing with this. Are there certain things I should or should not be saying about myself to a man I want to date?

[Anonymous]

It's a short hand for don't put up with crappy treatment.

[Anonymous]

I have no idea what people mean when they say that but I do know what it means when I say Know Yourself and Love Yourself. It means to pay close attention to yourself and understand your needs, wants and values very well. To build strong boundaries based on that knowledge and to enforce those boundaries consistently with yourself ( yes ego or fear makes you violate your own boundaries) and others.

In a nut shell, strong boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a short hand for don't put up with crappy treatment.

+1. How do you treat someone you respect, OP? Expect the same for yourself, and don't date someone who doesn't give you the level of respect that you would give someone else.

[Anonymous]

You can't make someone treat you well, but you can put up boundaries on what you'll tolerate and what you won't.

"Know your worth" to me, is don't settle. Don't stay with a cheater. Don't stay with someone who calls you names. Don't stay with someone who puts all emotional labor on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea what people mean when they say that but I do know what it means when I say Know Yourself and Love Yourself. It means to pay close attention to yourself and understand your needs, wants and values very well. To build strong boundaries based on that knowledge and to enforce those boundaries consistently with yourself ( yes ego or fear makes you violate your own boundaries) and others.

In a nut shell, strong boundaries.

All of this but I would also add know your morals and your personal beliefs. If you know that cheating is not something you'd do, then don't put up with someone who cheats on you. Know what your deal breakers are. Don't compromise your values for someone else.

[Anonymous]

All of the above BUT if we are talking about the dating market your worth is determined by your options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can't make someone treat you well, but you can put up boundaries on what you'll tolerate and what you won't.

"Know your worth" to me, is don't settle. Don't stay with a cheater. Don't stay with someone who calls you names. Don't stay with someone who puts all emotional labor on you.

I basically agree with this definition. Knowing your worth and communicating that to someone else means only accepting respectful treatment. Making someone else know it means them understanding that if they treat you badly, you will leave because your integrity is worth more to you than being in a relationship with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All of the above BUT if we are talking about the dating market your worth is determined by your options.

I agree that on the dating market, your "worth" is determined by your price point, crudely. I read this question as one related to personal integrity, which should be intrinsic and not motivated by your "options."

[Anonymous]

You cannot “make someone” know your worth. If that is what you think this is about, you have missed the entire point. Knowing your worth is entirely about yourself — and not putting up with nonsense, drama, etc.

And it isn’t just about a significant other. It is about not letting yourself be abused/taken advantage of with family, work, etc.

It is about being confident in what you bring to the table.

[Anonymous]

What do you want and need out of a relationship? Knowing your worth means knowing what you want/need and not putting up with someone who doesnt give you what you need.

Lets say you want someone who is going to text you good morning every day. Thats what you need, which you can express through being happy/appreciative when you receive texts. He will want to make you happy and repeat doing things that make you happy. He thinks you are worth it.

If you need to be monogamous to sleep with someone, say to them “i am really enjoying getting to know you and want to take this to the next level. Im not seeing anyone else while we get to know each other and want the same from you.” If he agrees, he respects your wishes. He thinks you are worth it.

Stuff like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of the above BUT if we are talking about the dating market your worth is determined by your options.

I agree that on the dating market, your "worth" is determined by your price point, crudely. I read this question as one related to personal integrity, which should be intrinsic and not motivated by your "options."

Being single is an option that is often forgotten, and is the essence of "know your worth". Don't degrade yourself just to avoid being single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of the above BUT if we are talking about the dating market your worth is determined by your options.

I agree that on the dating market, your "worth" is determined by your price point, crudely. I read this question as one related to personal integrity, which should be intrinsic and not motivated by your "options."

Being single is an option that is often forgotten, and is the essence of "know your worth". Don't degrade yourself just to avoid being single.

Exactly. being single is never as bad as being in a bad relationship

[Anonymous]

Your actions also show your self worth, which will translate into how you are treated.

If you “let” a dude text you at 2am and come over to your house after the bar to hook up, even though you dont go on dates, you are showing him that that is what you want/need. If youre cool w this type of relationship, no problem. But if you want more and dont make him give you more in order to hook up, you arent putting yourself first and knowing your worth. So why would he?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of the above BUT if we are talking about the dating market your worth is determined by your options.

I agree that on the dating market, your "worth" is determined by your price point, crudely. I read this question as one related to personal integrity, which should be intrinsic and not motivated by your "options."

Exactly this. You can believe you deserve a high value match all you want but unless you meet certain criteria you really don’t.