Is this braggy?

[Anonymous]

My sister is pregnant with her first baby. She got pregnant at 32 at first try. She has had no morning sickness and is active and fit even now into 6 months of pregnancy. She is tiny and doesn’t even look pregnant.

I was hanging out with her the other day and she kept saying how lucky she is and how lucky her baby is to be born yo her and her husband etc etc

It irritated me. I felt triggered. I know she is lucky. I’ve been TTC for 2 years and lost both tubes and am waiting to try IVF all the while being 4 years older than her.

So tired of hearing about her uniform luck!

[Anonymous]

She sounds extremely self-absorbed, and insensitive.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think framing things as “lucky” sounds braggy necessarily. It’s a concession you didn’t do anything to deserve it. It implies the opposite really.

It’s possible her point was more along the lines of, I appreciate that it could have gone differently and I don’t inherently deserve any of this.

If not for your struggles I don’t think you’d think anything of it.

[Anonymous]

Eh, keep in mind she might get a baby like mine was who didn't sleep through the night until about 14 months old. I worked out the day before I went into labor and stayed tiny and just looked like I had a basketball in my shirt. You never know.

[Anonymous]

If she knows everything you said in your post, I think it's incredibly self-centered and self-absorbed of her. But, if she doesn't know what you're going through or maybe knows only some of what is happening with you, I would say she's just excited and sharing.

[Anonymous]

Karma is waiting for her.

[Anonymous]

I immediately thought she sounded like she felt guilty for becoming pregnant so easily.

[Anonymous]

Every woman I know who didn’t have morning sickness immediately said “I know, I got so lucky.” It’s not a brag. It’s more like an apology that I didn’t get lucky (and boy did I not get lucky).

I’m wondering if there’s any honest thing she could say about her pregnant that wouldn’t seriously irk you given your tremendously bad luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think framing things as “lucky” sounds braggy necessarily. It’s a concession you didn’t do anything to deserve it. It implies the opposite really.

It’s possible her point was more along the lines of, I appreciate that it could have gone differently and I don’t inherently deserve any of this.

If not for your struggles I don’t think you’d think anything of it.

You don’t think her saying “how lucky her baby is to be born to her and her husband” is braggy and you think “it implies the opposite really?”

Oof. No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every woman I know who didn’t have morning sickness immediately said “I know, I got so lucky.” It’s not a brag. It’s more like an apology that I didn’t get lucky (and boy did I not get lucky).

I’m wondering if there’s any honest thing she could say about her pregnant that wouldn’t seriously irk you given your tremendously bad luck.

Agree. Don't think she sounds braggy. This was me. At 33, got pregnant first time using ovulation sticks. Didn't look pregnant. No morning sickness.Everything was super easy and smooth but.... then had severe preeclampsia and delivered at 29 weeks. And now, my son is 6 years old and we've been trying for 5 years. Lost tubes four years ago, diminished ovarian reserve and IVF doesn't work well, miscarriages, spent lots of money, lots of retrievals and transfers, and still no baby. So you never know. She could be in OP's boat down the road and really did just get very lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think framing things as “lucky” sounds braggy necessarily. It’s a concession you didn’t do anything to deserve it. It implies the opposite really.

It’s possible her point was more along the lines of, I appreciate that it could have gone differently and I don’t inherently deserve any of this.

If not for your struggles I don’t think you’d think anything of it.

You don’t think her saying “how lucky her baby is to be born to her and her husband” is braggy and you think “it implies the opposite really?”

Oof. No.

This is the only part that sounds off to me. The rest is a bit insensitive but is she supposed to pretend she isn’t pregnant or lie and say she’s having a horrible time? Would that really make you feel better?

[Anonymous]

It’s very insensitive to you. She needs to understand her audience while speaking about her fertility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think framing things as “lucky” sounds braggy necessarily. It’s a concession you didn’t do anything to deserve it. It implies the opposite really.

It’s possible her point was more along the lines of, I appreciate that it could have gone differently and I don’t inherently deserve any of this.

If not for your struggles I don’t think you’d think anything of it.

You don’t think her saying “how lucky her baby is to be born to her and her husband” is braggy and you think “it implies the opposite really?”

Oof. No.

I don’t think we have nearly enough context to say. I remember thinking something like that in the global context of born in a developed nation with English as a first language. And I still do think that’s awfully good luck for me and my offspring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she knows everything you said in your post, I think it's incredibly self-centered and self-absorbed of her. But, if she doesn't know what you're going through or maybe knows only some of what is happening with you, I would say she's just excited and sharing.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every woman I know who didn’t have morning sickness immediately said “I know, I got so lucky.” It’s not a brag. It’s more like an apology that I didn’t get lucky (and boy did I not get lucky).

I’m wondering if there’s any honest thing she could say about her pregnant that wouldn’t seriously irk you given your tremendously bad luck.

Agree. Don't think she sounds braggy. This was me. At 33, got pregnant first time using ovulation sticks. Didn't look pregnant. No morning sickness.Everything was super easy and smooth but.... then had severe preeclampsia and delivered at 29 weeks. And now, my son is 6 years old and we've been trying for 5 years. Lost tubes four years ago, diminished ovarian reserve and IVF doesn't work well, miscarriages, spent lots of money, lots of retrievals and transfers, and still no baby. So you never know. She could be in OP's boat down the road and really did just get very lucky.

Me too. Pregnant at 24 on accident. Pregnant at 33, first try, miscarriage, first try again. Pregnant at 35, first try then miscarriage, miscarriage, miscarriage, miscarriage, miscarriage, you get it. IVF and still no rainbow.