4th of July disappointment- has yours changed, too?

Anonymous
Yes, this is the dumbest thing ever, but I’m feeling down about the 4th of July (of all holidays!)! I grew up in a midwestern town with a neighborhood parade and multiple nights of town-sponsored evening fireworks shows. Everyone went to both and neighbors hosted a massive potluck dinner. Since then I’ve lived in places like Boston with epic celebrations. Now I live in a different town and I think I moved to the wrong place. No local parade. Fireworks are illegal but there aren’t municipal shows, so people just buy them on reservations and set them off one at a time at 3 am until school starts again. I tried to organized a bbq with friends and a day on the beach, but everyone is on vacation or visiting relatives.

Is the 4th of a July a big community event where you live, or is the phenomenon of it being just another long weekend for travel something you’re seeing, too? I know we see a patriotic holiday through a much more complicated lens than we used to, but it’s basically been erased from the social calendar of my circle and I’m sad.
Anonymous
Not much happens in my nova neighborhood. This year we happen to be going to a cookout at a neighbors but that is not the norm. Last year we went to see family in VT for the 4th and it was exactly as you describe. My kids had so much fun and what to go back.

In general, I just think people don’t host/plan things the way they used to. Is your old hometown the same or has it changed too?
Anonymous
We go to fireworks shows all weekend and have a potluck on the 4th, mostly with other immigrants. We’re not celebrating the US, we’re celebrating our friendships and enjoying the fireworks.
Anonymous
Good question! I checked with my mom out of curiosity. My hometown celebration has stayed the same if not increased in size and importance. The only change is that there seems to be big drama there about safety during the parade- as the parade has grown, too many kids are standing too close to the passing vehicles to catch thrown candy, so the police are implementing new safety rules. Every single neighborhood used to have their own community association and parade, so it can only get so crowded. My guess is that maybe other towns have cancelled their celebrations so people from neighboring areas are coming to watch “our” parade.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:We go to fireworks shows all weekend and have a potluck on the 4th, mostly with other immigrants. We’re not celebrating the US, we’re celebrating our friendships and enjoying the fireworks.


That’s the part that gets me as an immigrant family. We want to celebrate! After years of delays with the past administration, my husband finally has his American citizenship and he doesn’t even get a good 4th to celebrate it. We have every other summer weekend to do friend stuff.
Anonymous
DC of course has a big, free event…but that does not have a small town feel at all.

I went to a celebration once in Wisconsin. It was adorable. Very Norman Rockwell—but my with water-skiing or water Ballet. Maybe next year head to Lily Lake , Wisconsin 😀
Anonymous
Big here but I am a 4th of July scrooge.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Big here but I am a 4th of July scrooge.


Ha, I like that you admit it. I dislike pretty much every other holiday because of the family obligations and am a total Scrooge when it comes to Thanksgiving especially. I wait all year for the 4th and don’t want it to turn into a obligatory-family-visiting-weekend holiday, too!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:DC of course has a big, free event…but that does not have a small town feel at all.

I went to a celebration once in Wisconsin. It was adorable. Very Norman Rockwell—but my with water-skiing or water Ballet. Maybe next year head to Lily Lake , Wisconsin 😀


Of course the Mall fireworks in DC don't feel small-town. Nor should they.

If you're in the DC region, you can find plenty of town fireworks along with concerts, food trucks, historic site events, etc. etc. Just get out of the "Mall fireworks" bubble:

Mount Vernon has two nights of fireworks over the Potomac River, outside the historic mansion, the weekend before the 4th. Food, colonial ice cream making, re-enactors, George Washington gives a speech, etc.
Mount Vernon is open on July 4 as well and has "daytime fireworks" plus a band concert, Revolutionary re-enactors and fife and drum corps, tours of the house, a naturalization ceremony, the entire estate is open....
Herndon, Fairfax, Vienna, Falls Church all have fireworks shows plus bands for hours and food. Arlington has a parade.
The Capitol Hill neighborhood has had a July 4 parade in the past, so there's a "small town" thing within DC.
Probably tons of the same in varous MD towns as well.

When people complain here about the 4th I wonder if they even bother to look at listings for the many many events around the area!

to the OP who is not in this area: Look at towns around yours.
Anonymous
The 4th is much bigger here than it was further south.
Anonymous
I'm in the midwest, we still have our parade but there are no firework shows anymore because they've gotten too expensive. People shoot them off in the street and it's chaotic. Most people spend the weekend with family so we never get any party invites. I agree it's disappointing but I feel this way about all holidays since we don't have a big family like others seem to.
Anonymous
I live in San Francisco. Any time the Giants win, there are fireworks set off, so I hear them all the time. I used to live in NY and there were fireworks in the city but we only went once. I've never cared about this holiday.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm in the midwest, we still have our parade but there are no firework shows anymore because they've gotten too expensive. People shoot them off in the street and it's chaotic. Most people spend the weekend with family so we never get any party invites. I agree it's disappointing but I feel this way about all holidays since we don't have a big family like others seem to.


Thanks! I actually think that’s what’s getting to me but I hadn’t really sorted through that feeling until I read your comment. I don’t have a big family so it’s fun to have a holiday that doesn’t revolve around extended family and relatives. But it seems like it has turned into a family holiday (probably because of people’s career demands, geographically dispersed families, and limited time off) and it stinks. I don’t need year-round reminders that I have a small family. We surround ourselves with close friends, but they have their own extended families that are an understandable priority over us. I guess should question new acquaintances and ask how many siblings they have and how many of their relatives are still living!
-OP
Anonymous
Our Arlington neighborhood had a huge party every year with a massive fireworks show, neighbors cooking out, potluck, kids playing everywhere. Such a treat and great for the community of the neighborhood. Unfortunately, one or two Debbie Downers had to ruin it this year… fireworks are too scary, apparently.
Anonymous
I am an immigrant. There is a local event but it gets boring after years of attending. No one in my circle selebrates oe maybe they don’t invite me, so I mostly use it for travel now.
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