Help me decide what to do with my parents ashes
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Anonymous
| Both my parents are deceased and have been for 10 years. I have had their urns on my fireplace mantle for that long. I’m moving and think it may be time to let them go. I’m not religious and completely understand the ashes are just pulverized remains at this point but I feel a little funny about it. I am headed on vacation in the next week and I am strongly considering releasing them in a nice place there (legally and with permission). In the end something must be done with them at some point because obviously I won’t be around forever to keep them in my possession. Neither I nor they were tied strongly enough to an area that I feel it would make sense for me to place them in a columbarium or bury them so I feel my choices are release their ashes or keep them for now. What would you do? |
Anonymous
| My SIL has my brother's ashes in an urn on the mantle but she also had some put in heart shaped lockets for those of us who wanted one including me and my sister and his adult children. Mine is hanging from my rear view mirror in my car, I love seeing it everyday and thinking of him. |
Anonymous
| Contact a funeral home and ask anout how tobury the ashes at sea. Apparently a particular process. |
Anonymous
| We buried them at a cemetery |
Anonymous
| I released my dad's ashes into a river. (I'm from a culture where the river/ocean is traditional. The idea is so that their soul can be completely released from any connection to their earthly remains and be free.) |
Anonymous
| Same situation. I take them with me and spread them periodically. I don't bother making a big thing of it or checking in with anyone before I do. My loved ones weren't into paying more taxes/fees than they had to, so they'd be annoyed if I had to do so because I checked legalities first. |
Anonymous
|
Don’t be this fan who thought it was a good idea to dispose of his family member’s ashes at Heinz field (without permission).
https://www.steelernation.com/steelers-fan-spreads-ashes-at-heinz-field-steelers-condemn |
Anonymous
| We spread my parents ashes at sea in a place that had significance to them (we were way past the 3 miles from land point) and it was a biodegradable urn. We've had friends do similar. If you choose this route, please ensure you pay attention to the wind. My friend had a VERY unfortunate spreading of her husband's ashes due to the wind. |
Anonymous
This can cause a clash of cultures. In New Zealand, the Maori do not like ashes being released into waterways, which they regard as sacred. The Hindu community prefers to release ashes into waterways, causing conflict between the two communities. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| Similar situation OP. My parents ashes have been sitting in the black boxes we got from the crematory on a shelf in a closet for 10 years. My parents were not religious and made no plans at a cemetery or any final wishes. We still own the house where they lived so when the current tenant leaves I think we will bury their ashes in the yard under a newly planted tree. |
Anonymous
So be private about it. I'll assume OP is posting from the DMV. Not rubbing it in the face of a Maori shouldn't be too hard. |
Anonymous
What? Why? |
Anonymous
| I plan on dispersing my mothers ashes one solo cup at a time in places that were significant to her and I. |
Anonymous
Because if you are being legal about it, there are rules such as being 3 miles out to sea and filing a report with the EPA afterwards. https://www.epa.gov/ocean-dumping/burial-sea |