Mood disorder, emotional regulation and traditional schools

[Anonymous]

Does anyone have experience with a child with mood disorder and emotional regulation issues and the rigidity of a traditional public school versus a Montessori school? Any pros/ cons to each for this type of child?

[Anonymous]

Do you mean a Montessori public, where there would be 504/IEP rights?

I think with Montessori they do want the kids to work through disagreements more independently and generally be more independent, so if your child needs a lot of adult presence it might not be the best fit. Unless you had an IEP with an additional adult present.

[Anonymous]

Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you mean a Montessori public, where there would be 504/IEP rights?

I think with Montessori they do want the kids to work through disagreements more independently and generally be more independent, so if your child needs a lot of adult presence it might not be the best fit. Unless you had an IEP with an additional adult present.

Yes, public with 504 rights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

That is what I am struggling with. I am not sure if DC needs more structure than Montessori or if she would push back even harder.

[Anonymous]

Most Montessori's do not do well with kids who have special needs/delays. But, a mood disorder generally isn't diagnosed this young. You need to get an evaluation and therapy.

[Anonymous]

My kid is a little like this and goes to a private progressive. For a while it was rocky bc they do as others have said, expect independent self regulation and collaboration (Eg they don’t direct the situation themselves organically). However they do focus on social emotional curriculum and soft skills and that can also help equip someone who struggles with these things in a way that will benefit them long term. Eg in the workplace having been immersed in a collaborative environment as a child, they will be better able to handle group projects and interpersonal relationships and challenges - which in my opinion are actually more important skills than academic for success

[Anonymous]

How old is the child OP? Is this school in the DC area? More details would help us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old is the child OP? Is this school in the DC area? More details would help us.

DC will be going to K in a DCPS school. (Sorry for the delayed response)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

That is what I am struggling with. I am not sure if DC needs more structure than Montessori or if she would push back even harder.

As a special educator who hasn’t worked in Montessori, but has gotten kids who were counseled out of montessori, in my experience the combination of rigidity without structure in Montessori has been really hard for kids.

[Anonymous]

Neither for our kid. Non-public was the only setting that helped.

Traditional DCPS (with an excellent, excellent teacher -- that wasn't the issue) was a nightmare for our kid. Too much going on.

Small class size with experienced adults all over the building was the only thing that helped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

That is what I am struggling with. I am not sure if DC needs more structure than Montessori or if she would push back even harder.

I guess the thing is that unless you are lucky, your typical public classroom has a lot less structure, routine, and predictability than you expect. There's lots of moving back and forth between different small groups. The 'workshop model', for example, is very popular locally and it does ADHD kids no favors. The choice may not be traditional vs. Montessori, but whatever's happening in your local school vs. Montessori.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

That is what I am struggling with. I am not sure if DC needs more structure than Montessori or if she would push back even harder.

I guess the thing is that unless you are lucky, your typical public classroom has a lot less structure, routine, and predictability than you expect. There's lots of moving back and forth between different small groups. The 'workshop model', for example, is very popular locally and it does ADHD kids no favors. The choice may not be traditional vs. Montessori, but whatever's happening in your local school vs. Montessori.

To add, we sent our most ADHD kid to a small religious (Christian) traditionally-oriented school for K and he did much better than we expected. I think all three of those factors were useful, in different ways.

Small: there's less going on, more attention from teacher, anxiety dialed down by there being fewer classmates (anxiety is typically comorbid with ADHD), fewer options for distraction.

Religious: Ritual, prayer, meditative practice. There are times you are sitting quietly, but you are being taught to do a thing while sitting quietly - helps exercise focus.

Traditional: Order and structure. More explicit teaching, less expectation that learning will be absorbed by osmosis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some kids with those concerns really prefer the structure and routine and predictability of a traditional classroom, especially if they have anxiety. Some kids struggle with the long blocks of time and the flexibility of Montessori, because it can be overwhelming if kids aren't yet able to manage it internally. It really just depends on the child.

That is what I am struggling with. I am not sure if DC needs more structure than Montessori or if she would push back even harder.

I guess the thing is that unless you are lucky, your typical public classroom has a lot less structure, routine, and predictability than you expect. There's lots of moving back and forth between different small groups. The 'workshop model', for example, is very popular locally and it does ADHD kids no favors. The choice may not be traditional vs. Montessori, but whatever's happening in your local school vs. Montessori.

Every kid is different, of course, but just chiming in to say that my kid who has ADHD goes to a school that uses the workshop model, and kid likes it and does well with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is a little like this and goes to a private progressive. For a while it was rocky bc they do as others have said, expect independent self regulation and collaboration (Eg they don’t direct the situation themselves organically). However they do focus on social emotional curriculum and soft skills and that can also help equip someone who struggles with these things in a way that will benefit them long term. Eg in the workplace having been immersed in a collaborative environment as a child, they will be better able to handle group projects and interpersonal relationships and challenges - which in my opinion are actually more important skills than academic for success

My son now with an ADHD diagnosis (that mostly presents as emotional dysregulation) also had some similar struggles in a very progressive preschool because the unstructured nature of it actually required a lot of independent self regulation and collaboration with peers. His teacher who very much believes in the model identified that he does actually do better with teacher directed activities. I think because it has clear boundaries, a clear task and direction from the teacher. This was all hard for me to reconcile a little because he also has a hard time with direction and not being able to do exactly what he wants And I personally love the idea of classrooms that are less rigid, follow kids interests etc. But I think in a group setting, it is too much for him to regulate across different groups, tasks, peers, etc. I've had to really consider that more structure may be better for him.

It's hard to figure out - we considered applying to the public montessori in our area but based on the experience above decided against it. Son's therapist also said she has seen kids struggle with the montessori approach with a similar profile. For all the reasons folks have shared. They are simultaneously rigid (must complete the task a certain way, I don't think my child would do well with this) while also requiring a lot of regulation. For my kid at least, I also worried he would just pick certain activities over and over and not the ones that are harder for him which I've heard can be an issue in Montessori so particularly an issue for kids with ADHD.

Wish I could report out to you, but we haven't gotten there yet. Starting public K in a regular classroom with IEP supports next Fall. Hoping the structure and clear boundaries is a good fit for him but I'm sure the large classroom will be a struggle.