The unimaginable grief of losing babies

[Anonymous]

Today, my heart just stopped.

I've had 5 losses in 2 years. One was second trimester. Around the time that happened to me a friend had a stillborn. I supported her in her grief.

Well it happened again to her. She had another stillborn. She also lost her uterus.

Full stop, I can't. My heart is shattered for them. I've got nothing good to say.

I'm just here because I don't know how to not just hold that grief and my own grief and just want reality to be something other than it is.

[Anonymous]

I’m so sorry OP. For both of you. I’m not a wordsmith but please know that a stranger is thinking of you both and sending warm and healing thoughts.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry OP. My sister had many losses too. She actually just adopted a newborn a few months ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m so sorry OP. For both of you. I’m not a wordsmith but please know that a stranger is thinking of you both and sending warm and healing thoughts.

Thank you, I said something similar to her. I didn't say sorry, I said how beautiful her child is, how much I love her and how glad I am that she is alive.

I didn't want to talk about the pain or I can't imagine or why you. Because none of that seems right to say and I know she's already saying that to herself.

I know grief is so dang personal that maybe she does want to hear something that I can't imagine saying. I know she doesn't want to talk and needs space so that's the gift I can give at the moment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm so sorry OP. My sister had many losses too. She actually just adopted a newborn a few months ago.

Thanks for sharing. I hope my friend finds what she desires next on this journey. Whatever that next is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so sorry OP. For both of you. I’m not a wordsmith but please know that a stranger is thinking of you both and sending warm and healing thoughts.

Thank you, I said something similar to her. I didn't say sorry, I said how beautiful her child is, how much I love her and how glad I am that she is alive.

I didn't want to talk about the pain or I can't imagine or why you. Because none of that seems right to say and I know she's already saying that to herself.

I know grief is so dang personal that maybe she does want to hear something that I can't imagine saying. I know she doesn't want to talk and needs space so that's the gift I can give at the moment.

It’s hard in times like this to not fill the void. It’s our natural reaction to want to make things better but I think often in doing so we say the wrong thing.

Sometimes we just have to say - I’m here for you and I love you. And giving her the space she needs is the best thing too.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I know from experience that this time is tough.

[Anonymous]

I’m so sorry, OP, for you and your friend. That sounds devastating.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry OP for you and your friend. An acquaintance of mine recently lost her son at 37 weeks. I barely knew her but my heart stopped for her and I cried for her and thought of her for days and still do. It is just so cruel and I cannot even imagine the pain of meeting and losing your child on the same day. I believe in God but this is one situation that I find very hard to accept.