Burden of inheritance
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Anonymous
| Are there any habits or traits which you learned from your parents and would hate for your children to learn. |
Anonymous
| None so devastating as medical and/or psychiatric diagnoses, OP. We have one child with special needs, and another one who does not. It's so much easier to go through life if you're within the range of normal, regardless of your personal habits or traits. |
Anonymous
| I’m pretty sure all the things I struggle with are genetic and not learned. |
Anonymous
| I agree but should've been more clear that this query is about behavioral inheritance not genetics or wealth. |
Anonymous
Right? I came here to read about someone who was put out because they inherited a fortune. |
Anonymous
|
Oh, lots. My dad has a lot of narcissistic traits. He grew up in a large, abusive family with an alcoholic and absent father and never really learned what empathy was or the concept of caring for others. Sometimes I feel bad for him even though his behavior screwed me up a lot when I was young, because he just never really had a chance. But I do think I've escaped that fate, thankfully, and don't really see it passing on to my kid (though it is something I think about).
I worry more about traits from my mom. She has very low self-esteem and chronic depression, and I have definitely inherited those to a degree. But unlike my mom, I have pursued treatment for both and do work pretty hard at them. It is hard at times but my approach to it is so different than my mom's. She can be very defeatist about it, specifically because they are heritable traits, to where she's like "oh well, this is just how everyone in our family is." But I don't accept that and I think I've come a long way. But I also do assume it's highly likely my kid will acquire them. My goal is just to be responsive to signs and supportive in ways my mom wasn't -- making sure she has access to therapy or medication if necessary, providing a calm and supportive home life where it's possible to talk about difficult feelings and address them instead of ignoring and suppressing. I also worry she will wind up with acne like I did, but as with the mental health, I intend to be more supportive in helping to address it than my parents were. |
Anonymous
Damn, me too! |
Anonymous
And see if I could relieve some of the burden for them in Cabo. |
Anonymous
Same |
Anonymous
| For example, drinking, rage, shyness, overconfidence etc. |