"Real-life" examples of alimony paid/received?

[Anonymous]

I am trying to get some "real-life" examples of what alimony looks like in different situations. Would greatly appreciate anyone who's gone through this answering the following questions to help me do that:

-What was the length of your marriage?
-What was your income...and what was your spouse's income...at the time of separation/divorce or when terms were negotiated/litigated?
-What was the monthly amount of alimony determined to be paid or received?
-For what duration?
-Were there any terms that would cause that alimony to change? (For example, if the lower-earning spouse earned over a certain income?)
-What state are you in?
-I am asking these questions assuming a 50/50 split of assets, but if that's not the case in your situation and an uneven division of assets had an impact on how you structured alimony, I would be interested in hearing how you worked that.

I know that many will advise to consult a lawyer, but just hoping some of you will be willing to answer these questions.

Thank you.

[Anonymous]

NYC, paid $3k/month for 3 years. Marriage was 14 years long.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am trying to get some "real-life" examples of what alimony looks like in different situations. Would greatly appreciate anyone who's gone through this answering the following questions to help me do that:

-What was the length of your marriage?
-What was your income...and what was your spouse's income...at the time of separation/divorce or when terms were negotiated/litigated?
-What was the monthly amount of alimony determined to be paid or received?
-For what duration?
-Were there any terms that would cause that alimony to change? (For example, if the lower-earning spouse earned over a certain income?)
-What state are you in?
-I am asking these questions assuming a 50/50 split of assets, but if that's not the case in your situation and an uneven division of assets had an impact on how you structured alimony, I would be interested in hearing how you worked that.

I know that many will advise to consult a lawyer, but just hoping some of you will be willing to answer these questions.

Thank you.

17 years
I made $235,000. She had a real estate license and only worked sporadically. Mainly because she didn't really like to work.
She cheated. I used that information to leverage an acceptable (to me) settlement. Offered alimony of $2,300 for seven years. Plus child support on 50/50, even though the kids basically lived with me 80% of the time. Total monthly payment around $3,400. This was based on an assignment of income of $55,000 a year to her -- a figure in between two she gave on worksheets to a different lawyer (and left those sheets laying around the house before I realized we were getting divorced).
Virginia.
My lawyer included clauses to say alimony was non-modifiable and she forfeited any right to seek more after the initial seven years.
50/50 split of assets.

Keep in mind proof of the affair gave me all the leverage because if we went to court she risked getting nothing. She denied the affair, but didn't know the evidence I had (from a PI) and so basically wasn't willing to take it to court. Her lawyer made her sign papers indemnifying them since they seemed to think she could get more (although I don't think she was as honest with them about her adultery, which might have affected their advice). I'm only mentioning this because I'm not sure this is a typical arrangement.

She initially sought twice as much for 10 years. We just outright rejected that.

Never saw the inside of a courtroom.

[Anonymous]

Not a lwyer, but just a comment that proof of an affair can be helpful in VA (where PP was), but isn't used in courts in MD or DC.

[Anonymous]

No fault divorce. He made $350K I made $150K imputed income. 10y marriage led to 3y alimony at $2500/m. Child support is <$2K.

[Anonymous]

Women, these figures of alimony and child support don't sound all that great, do they? How in the world can a woman maintain a mortgage payment on a $1 million house, car payment, etc. without a career of her own. A man is not a plan.

[Anonymous]

Married 24 years to a doctor. Got alimony for life. $10,000 a monthfor the first 8 years and it goes down after that. In the end I get $3,000 a month life.

[Anonymous]

At fault divorce. Received full custody. $1000 received in Virginia for 2 kids per month. Ex had median salary for area. It's pathetic. Virginia is very backwards on this.

[Anonymous]

This is the third time you’ve asked this in the last few months. Pay for an attorney.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married 24 years to a doctor. Got alimony for life. $10,000 a monthfor the first 8 years and it goes down after that. In the end I get $3,000 a month life.

what happens if the doctor dies?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am trying to get some "real-life" examples of what alimony looks like in different situations. Would greatly appreciate anyone who's gone through this answering the following questions to help me do that:

-What was the length of your marriage?
-What was your income...and what was your spouse's income...at the time of separation/divorce or when terms were negotiated/litigated?
-What was the monthly amount of alimony determined to be paid or received?
-For what duration?
-Were there any terms that would cause that alimony to change? (For example, if the lower-earning spouse earned over a certain income?)
-What state are you in?
-I am asking these questions assuming a 50/50 split of assets, but if that's not the case in your situation and an uneven division of assets had an impact on how you structured alimony, I would be interested in hearing how you worked that.

I know that many will advise to consult a lawyer, but just hoping some of you will be willing to answer these questions.

Thank you.

17 years
I made $235,000. She had a real estate license and only worked sporadically. Mainly because she didn't really like to work.
She cheated. I used that information to leverage an acceptable (to me) settlement. Offered alimony of $2,300 for seven years. Plus child support on 50/50, even though the kids basically lived with me 80% of the time. Total monthly payment around $3,400. This was based on an assignment of income of $55,000 a year to her -- a figure in between two she gave on worksheets to a different lawyer (and left those sheets laying around the house before I realized we were getting divorced).
Virginia.
My lawyer included clauses to say alimony was non-modifiable and she forfeited any right to seek more after the initial seven years.
50/50 split of assets.

Keep in mind proof of the affair gave me all the leverage because if we went to court she risked getting nothing. She denied the affair, but didn't know the evidence I had (from a PI) and so basically wasn't willing to take it to court. Her lawyer made her sign papers indemnifying them since they seemed to think she could get more (although I don't think she was as honest with them about her adultery, which might have affected their advice). I'm only mentioning this because I'm not sure this is a typical arrangement.

She initially sought twice as much for 10 years. We just outright rejected that.

Never saw the inside of a courtroom.

You offered too much, should have dragged her through court

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married 24 years to a doctor. Got alimony for life. $10,000 a monthfor the first 8 years and it goes down after that. In the end I get $3,000 a month life.

what happens if the doctor dies?

Life insurance policy usually

[Anonymous]

None of these talk about retirement you are usually entitled to alimony AND part of their retirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women, these figures of alimony and child support don't sound all that great, do they? How in the world can a woman maintain a mortgage payment on a $1 million house, car payment, etc. without a career of her own. A man is not a plan.

Because alimony is different from the division of assets. A $1M home is sold if she can’t pay mortgage and she gets half. Cars can be sold and more affordable models purchased. And, you get alimony even if you do work.

I agree women should have a plan but they should never *ever* waive alimony to which they are entitled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married 24 years to a doctor. Got alimony for life. $10,000 a monthfor the first 8 years and it goes down after that. In the end I get $3,000 a month life.

For life or rather until doctor retires, presuming that retirement assets are equally divided?