Trying to catch a break as a part-time nurse and primary parent

[Anonymous]

I have terrible knee pain, and lets just say it's becoming hard to parent my kids without using the tv. I work a non traditional schedule so most of the time, I am home with the kids aged 2 and 6. We have a membership to a gym close by that has childcare so I try to utilize that a few days a week because my son loves it. I hate that gym, personally. There's nowhere comfortable to sit and read. It feels cramped. Hardly any mirrors around. I am considering joining a nicer gym like Lifetime fitness, but it's a further drive. It's around 20 minutes. I was also thinking of hiring a babysitter mother helper two mornings a week and working out doing physical therapy at home. I'm kind of torn because lifetime would giving me more chances to meet mom's and it feels more social/fun. I am new to the area and I live pretty far out. We move a lot and I always get depressed. The community we live in now is mainly people from my husbands culture. They are nice, but I don't think I'll be included in their get-togethers. They speak in another language at the bus stop. I have only been living here for two weeks. I can't do both lifetime and a twice-a-week babysitter. I work the third shift 3 days a week, and two days are Sat and Sunday. I have to put myself first because my body is a mess right now. I have had chronic pain for over a year. I'm not overweight. What would you do in my position? Make the crappy gym work because its closer and kid loves it and baby sitter the other two days so I can do physical therapy exercises in my bedroom? I need to install a large mirror so that I can see myself exercising. Moving really drained everything from me.

[Anonymous]

Babysitter until the fall and then do preschool

[Anonymous]

3 shifts a week = full time, doesn't it?

I would pick either short term solution for now (gym or babysitter) but start looking right now (like Jan 2023) for part time preschools for the 2 yo. You should be able to get 9-12 two or three days a week for a very reasonable monthly price if you go with a church or synagogue. Its also a great place to meet other moms.

[Anonymous]

^^meant to include that signups for FALL preschool are happening now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:3 shifts a week = full time, doesn't it?

I would pick either short term solution for now (gym or babysitter) but start looking right now (like Jan 2023) for part time preschools for the 2 yo. You should be able to get 9-12 two or three days a week for a very reasonable monthly price if you go with a church or synagogue. Its also a great place to meet other moms.

OP here. Thanks. I got a call back for a preschool tour but they won't have spots until August. I think I am going to go with Lifetime because I am already going crazy being home so much. My son is soooooo active. I need to wear him out swimming or running around the basketball court. It's been so cold and rainy. I can't take him to the outdoor playground in this weather.

[Anonymous]

Yes you can take him to a playground or for a walk in this weather. What do you think those of us without cards do, or that have dogs that need exercise? But warm clothing and be ok being outside. Back to the parenting struggle….are you constantly primary parent if not at work? Because you should get a break too. If you would 3rd shift on weekends maybe you handle kids Sat mornings before work and he does Sundays before you work. What you do with the kids on your morning is up to you both but I would get them out as much as possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes you can take him to a playground or for a walk in this weather. What do you think those of us without cards do, or that have dogs that need exercise? But warm clothing and be ok being outside. Back to the parenting struggle….are you constantly primary parent if not at work? Because you should get a break too. If you would 3rd shift on weekends maybe you handle kids Sat mornings before work and he does Sundays before you work. What you do with the kids on your morning is up to you both but I would get them out as much as possible.

[Anonymous]

RN here. Yes take care of yourself. I didn’t when working night shift and had a severe health issue. Better now but work clinic hours. As a nurse we always take care of there, then mother and wife. At least 1 day a week take care of you.

[Anonymous]

3 nights a week. Full time girl. You deserve a break!

[Anonymous]

It is a concern that you both work FT yet can’t afford childcare. Theoretically you should be able to afford FT childcare for your 2yo, which you could choose to allocate towards gym + PT childcare

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:3 shifts a week = full time, doesn't it?

I would pick either short term solution for now (gym or babysitter) but start looking right now (like Jan 2023) for part time preschools for the 2 yo. You should be able to get 9-12 two or three days a week for a very reasonable monthly price if you go with a church or synagogue. Its also a great place to meet other moms.

I only work 8-hour shifts. This is OP.

[Anonymous]

I vote to take care of yourself first. Get a babysitter and get the physical therapy you need.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I vote to take care of yourself first. Get a babysitter and get the physical therapy you need.

Op here. I spoke to a lovely retired lady who lives very close. She sounds great and mentioned her community has a pool the kids may be able to use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:3 shifts a week = full time, doesn't it?

I would pick either short term solution for now (gym or babysitter) but start looking right now (like Jan 2023) for part time preschools for the 2 yo. You should be able to get 9-12 two or three days a week for a very reasonable monthly price if you go with a church or synagogue. Its also a great place to meet other moms.

OP here. Thanks. I got a call back for a preschool tour but they won't have spots until August. I think I am going to go with Lifetime because I am already going crazy being home so much. My son is soooooo active. I need to wear him out swimming or running around the basketball court. It's been so cold and rainy. I can't take him to the outdoor playground in this weather.

I would still take the slot for August (there or somewhere else, but get signed up for the Fall now, or all the spots will get taken.) Then join Lifetime until then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:3 shifts a week = full time, doesn't it?

I would pick either short term solution for now (gym or babysitter) but start looking right now (like Jan 2023) for part time preschools for the 2 yo. You should be able to get 9-12 two or three days a week for a very reasonable monthly price if you go with a church or synagogue. Its also a great place to meet other moms.

OP here. Thanks. I got a call back for a preschool tour but they won't have spots until August. I think I am going to go with Lifetime because I am already going crazy being home so much. My son is soooooo active. I need to wear him out swimming or running around the basketball court. It's been so cold and rainy. I can't take him to the outdoor playground in this weather.

I would still take the slot for August (there or somewhere else, but get signed up for the Fall now, or all the spots will get taken.) Then join Lifetime until then.

Op here. I am looking into it.