How to drop the night feeding - 9 month old

[Anonymous]

Hi all, FTM here. I have a 9 month old who still feeds in the night. Peds told us at her age she doesn’t need a feed at night and should be able to put herself back to sleep. She eats well during the day and is very healthy. We tried and are still trying not to give her a feed at night but she’ll cry her eyes out until we give in. Any tips to help kick the middle of the night feed. Part of me also wonders if she’ll wean herself off eventually. Any tips would be appreciated.

[Anonymous]

Would start by gradually increasing amount at each daytime feeding. Easier to track if you bottle feed, obviously

[Anonymous]

I would listen to your pediatrician, btw. If you don't get your kid sleeping through the night by about a year old, it gets harder and harder

[Anonymous]

Sleep Easy Solution.

Short version: track, for a week or two, what time she wakes to eat and how much she eats (minutes if nursing, ounces if bottle feeding).

Then, wake her one hour BEFORE the earliest time she wakes (so - if she wakes between 3 and 4, wake her at 2. Feed her slightly less than her max. If she nurses for 15-20 mins, nurse for 18 mins. If she wakes up crying at any other point, let her cry it out (with checks, Ferber style). The next night, wake her at 2 again (yes, you’ll need to set an alarm) and nurse for 16 mins. Then 14, 12, etc until it’s 2 mins. Then the next night, don’t wake her at all. Done.

Went super smoothly for both my kids.

[Anonymous]

You trained her to cry until you give in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You trained her to cry until you give in.

Do you have any helpful advice or did you just decide to wake up this morning and be an ass?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you all for the feedback and helpful plan to help us kick the nightly feed. Appreciate it and I hope it works.

[Anonymous]

Is she nursing or is this a bottle?

I’m asking because years ago, I had to instantly wean my son from his nighttime feed. Instead of nursing, I gave him a cold bottle. He threw it at me and never woke up at night for that feed again.

[Anonymous]

How old was your baby when the cold bottle worked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would start by gradually increasing amount at each daytime feeding. Easier to track if you bottle feed, obviously

Increase daily drinking, decrease night drinking. If she nurses for 10 minutes, go to 8, then 6 etc. Or if it's formula, go from 15 oz to 12 oz etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You trained her to cry until you give in.

+1. I sympathize. I was in the same boat with DC1. The only thing that worked was letting them cry it out. It was really hard and took almost a week but ultimately worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You trained her to cry until you give in.

Do you have any helpful advice or did you just decide to wake up this morning and be an ass?

She is right - you can try to decrease the amount of feeding, but there will likely be some version of cry it out in OP’s future. Pretending these “gentle sleep solutions” work for every baby if only the mom did it right is wrong.

[Anonymous]

Cold turkey is best. You kiss her goodnight at 7pm, say, "see you in the morning sweetheart" and do not go in until at least 6am. There may be some tears for a few nights, so wear earplugs if necessary. Easier to do it now - if you let it go on much longer you'll be trying the same with a strong-willed toddler.

[Anonymous]

OP, I just want to let you know that I went through this exact situation. DD was 9 mo, pediatrician was like "she should not be feeding at night" but nursing was the only thing that would calm her and I simply do not have it in me to do actual CIO.

I have two questions for you:

1) What is your daily schedule like? Do you work, is it full time, is it out of the house? In other words, what are YOUR sleep requirements? I think in retrospect the focus on getting my DD to STTN by my pediatrician was based on the expectation that doing one night feed was greatly disruptive of my sleep schedule. But I was working part time in the afternoon and was home with the baby in the morning for the whole first year. Which meant that I took a morning nap with the baby every morning at 8:30 or 9am. I was sleeping great, the 3am feed didn't bug me at all and since the baby never woke up DH, I did not view it as a problem.

2) What time does you baby wake up in the morning after doing a night feed? Mine would sleep until 7am. I later learned that many people whose babies "STTN" at this age also regularly woke up ready for breakfast before 6am. Truthfully, I'd rather do a sleepy night feed at 3am and go straight back to sleep than wake up at 5am to feed and then struggle to fall back asleep.

My kid naturally eliminated the night feed around 10 or 11 months. I think I did a dream feed for a while to help make it happen? But only like a week or two. We never did CIO.

[Anonymous]

How much is she drinking at night? I had an off-the-charts for size baby who was still feeding 1x overnight and he would down a full bottle and still want more. He had been eating solids for months, got plenty during the day. But was a BIG boy.