20yo having sudden sleep issues/anxiety....help

[Anonymous]

My 20 yo is in college, currently in final exams, for 3 nights she has barely slept. She has tried and sleep has just escaped her. She is getting increasingly scared/anxious about getting through her finals. I'm sure some of this is exam stress (although she claims she wasn't particularly anxious going in to exam period.) This has happened from time to time her in past but usually goes away on its own after a day or two. Any ideas for a quick fix and longer term strategies? We know all the standard sleep hygiene recommendations but that doesn't seem to be doing the trick for her right now and I feel at a loss as I get her stress texts about it.

[Anonymous]

For me, very hard cardio works when I get like this

[Anonymous]

Exercise would do her good. Tell her to hit the campus gym for an hour every day. Walk, run, take a spin class, work off the anxiety. It is VERY important to burn it off. The times when you think "I don't have time" is when you need it most.

Also, tell her to take relaxation breaks. Get a cup of tea, turn on calming music, and just stare out the window for 30 minutes (or stare at the ceiling, whatever works). I'm serious. She has to get into a relaxation mode a few times a day during finals week.

Memorizing material out loud is proven to help one remember it better, FYI. When I need to remember details, is say them out loud to myself. It works.

At some point, you either know the material, or not. You either understand it, or not. There is a point of diminishing returns to burning the 3 a.m. oil during finals week. She is likely better off taking a long walk.

[Anonymous]

Is she taking any new OTC medications for illness, such as Sudafed or a nasal corticosteroid like Flonase? These can affect sleep. Otherwise I agree it's likely exam stress - maybe a Calm meditation track (available on Youtube) would help?

[Anonymous]

She can try Unisome or another safe sleep aid for few days to get through exams but after that if it continues even with good sleep hygiene and no academic stress during holidays, she can see a sleep specialist in January.

[Anonymous]

Is there a friends or boyfriend issues going on as well?

[Anonymous]

Is she taking any medications that might affect sleep ? Some allergy meds such as Singular can cause problems.

Daily exercise & a healthy diet are important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me, very hard cardio works when I get like this

This ^. It is likely that there was some degree of procrastination and now there is anxiety and cramming, no matter what she tells you. All pretty typical for college students. We can’t protect our children from every discomfort, more’s the pity. After finals and when things are back to normal, talk about what she can do differently for next time.

[Anonymous]

thanks all, i suspect it is mostly an exam related thing (although this has come up for her before, she has periodic flare ups of anxiety but has always been able to manage it) and we've talked about boosting cardio exercise in next few days etc etc

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me, very hard cardio works when I get like this

This ^. It is likely that there was some degree of procrastination and now there is anxiety and cramming, no matter what she tells you. All pretty typical for college students. We can’t protect our children from every discomfort, more’s the pity. After finals and when things are back to normal, talk about what she can do differently for next time.

This exactly! My DD also having sleep issues in college this week. 2 papers due and 2 exams. Major procrastinator.

[Anonymous]

My dd too. She asked for an extension on a paper, originally due Tuesday but prof said she could turn in tomorrow. Since she has been home she’s done absolutely nothing for paper. Highly stressful to watch.
Public school (mcps) did nothing to prep her for this. I get it op. There were some calls with tears last week. Lots of my friends said the same thing. I wish her the best for a chill winter break

[Anonymous]

And by the way unisom as the worst, for me personally. It made my eyes shut, but my brain was wide awake all night. It was hell!
The sleep hygiene suggestion is valid. Clean up well, some herbal tea, and no screens and a proper bedtime work best. And a book, the kind with real pages and not a book on the iPad! Maybe a low dose of melatonin’s (I have read nothing over 3 mg)

[Anonymous]

Usually when I can't sleep due to anxiety it's because I can't get my heart to stop racing at night. I've found that I need to get my body out of that heightened state. What works best for me is just trying to be extremely calm and relaxed the next day. For me intense workouts only make it worse because it keeps my body in that heightened state. Instead I find relaxing yoga, guided meditation, or going for a long calming walk help. Basically I try to keep my breathing and heart rate as controlled as possible throughout the day.

[Anonymous]

When I was in grad school, I would sometimes get a nearby hotel room for a night or two so I could study in peace without too much distractions.

[Anonymous]

I’m an insomniac and DD is also prone to insomnia. She managed to significantly improve in HS by sticking to a healthy, regular routine and has done very well in college.

And so, going into exams, I remind her:

Have a set bedtime during the week, and a set time to wake up. Give yourself an extra hour or 2 on weekends, but that’s it— even if you brew a cup of coffee and cuddle back in bed with a book.

Have a night time, wind down routine, then get in bed without your electronics.

Eat meals at regular times during exams. Eat healthy. Keep the snacks relatively healthy.

Don’t study in your dorm room all day, and definitely not your bed.

Melatonin. Unison is actually very safe. I used it when pregnant with my OB’s blessing. But, I wouldn’t try it for the first time in the middle of finals. Not everyone has the same reaction.

Keep the exercise routine going.