Drinking: cutting back vs. quitting

[Anonymous]

I was feeling pretty good about myself because I hadn’t had a drink in a month. Yesterday I was at a party where it would stand out if I didn’t at least have a beer in my hand so I had one and nursed it for 2 hours. I feel fine and it’s not like I have shakes and am craving a drink today, so I’m still gonna say I haven’t been drinking for a month😁. Is that ok? Or am I playing with fire? How do you know what the right approach is? I always told myself I don’t want to be someone who can’t have a glass of wine at a steakhouse, or a beer at a super bowl party…. I just want to be healthier and stop treating alcohol as a way to unwind/relax.

I’ve come this far and I’m feeling great. I don’t want to blow it!

[Anonymous]

Tell yourself whatever helps keep you on your healthy path. Great job!

[Anonymous]

Honestly I think the true test is that you had one beer and that was it. You are doing great. And if you are in a situation like that again, and you find it much harder to stop at 1 (or whatever you decide is ok) then reassess and decide if you want to drink at all in social situations.

[Anonymous]

Why do you need to say that you haven’t been drinking for a month? I don’t get it. I rarely drink but I don’t count the time in between drinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to say that you haven’t been drinking for a month? I don’t get it. I rarely drink but I don’t count the time in between drinks.

I hear you but I don’t think I’ve turned the corner yet. I don’t feel I’m at the place where I can not think about it and be like “hey no big thing” yet. I started drinking more the last 2+ years—almost daily (whether it was a couple glasses of wine while cooking dinner, some beers while watching tv at night, etc.). So for me it feels really awesome to not be drinking. TBH I wasn’t really intending to stop, it just kind of happened and I remember the last drink I had, so I figured I’d just keep track in my head. No looking back now!

[Anonymous]

Did you have a drinking problem before? Or did you just decide to limit or stop drinking for health and wellness reasons? If the latter, it really doesn't' matter. You're not collecting chips. Do what you want.

I almost never drink since having a kid. It just disrupts my sleep too much and can trigger migraines, which have gotten bad in the last few years (even when I don't drink). But I'm not sober and I drink at weddings or dinners out with friends whenever I want. I'm not breaking any rules. I just do it knowing it might not make me feel the best the next day, so I don't do it all the time. It's not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you are on the right track. I drink hooch every once in awhile and always go back to normal in a day or two. And the volume is nothing like it was before. It’s a lot healthier for me to realize I can do this and have control vs. completely avoiding it. Makes traveling for pleasure a lot more fun. And usually I do it at the tail end and do all my outdoor type stuff early (running, hiking, etc..)

[Anonymous]

OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

[Anonymous]

I would go longer without drinking before adding it back in so you well and truly lose that instinct/urge to drink. Several months to a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

I wouldn’t have any concerns about OP’s drinking if she hadn’t specifically said she was going to keep saying she hadn’t been drinking for a month when she did, in fact, have a drink.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

DP. OP is doing fine, but it’s also not true that she hasn’t had a drink in a month. Having to tell herself something she knows isn’t true does sound odd. Why not say she hasn’t drunk to excess or something else that is true?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

DP. OP is doing fine, but it’s also not true that she hasn’t had a drink in a month. Having to tell herself something she knows isn’t true does sound odd. Why not say she hasn’t drunk to excess or something else that is true?

Do you suck at verb tense? Yesterday “I had not.” That’s the time frame. Before then. It wasn’t inclusive. JFC.

People on here are amazing. OP is doing great. Unbalanced thinking like this is more toxic than the alcohol. OP should be listening to people that have been through this and not finger waggles that torture verb tense to create a lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

DP. OP is doing fine, but it’s also not true that she hasn’t had a drink in a month. Having to tell herself something she knows isn’t true does sound odd. Why not say she hasn’t drunk to excess or something else that is true?

Do you suck at verb tense? Yesterday “I had not.” That’s the time frame. Before then. It wasn’t inclusive. JFC.

People on here are amazing. OP is doing great. Unbalanced thinking like this is more toxic than the alcohol. OP should be listening to people that have been through this and not finger waggles that torture verb tense to create a lie.

WTF is your problem? She said, “I’m still gonna say…” no one is arguing about verb tenses, we are simply saying that continuing to say sue hasn’t been drinking for a month is no longer true. Because….it is no longer true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it would be a lie to say you haven’t had a drink in a month. The fact that you feel a need to lie about it your drinking is a red flag, even if you managed that one drink without obvious issues

Let me guess, you also think if you ever drank more than six beers in a day you are going to die.

OP is doing fine. It’s extreme unbalanced thinking like yours that makes people like OP think they are not on track. The nerve to call them out as a lier is amazing. What’s hiding in your closet?

DP. OP is doing fine, but it’s also not true that she hasn’t had a drink in a month. Having to tell herself something she knows isn’t true does sound odd. Why not say she hasn’t drunk to excess or something else that is true?

Do you suck at verb tense? Yesterday “I had not.” That’s the time frame. Before then. It wasn’t inclusive. JFC.

People on here are amazing. OP is doing great. Unbalanced thinking like this is more toxic than the alcohol. OP should be listening to people that have been through this and not finger waggles that torture verb tense to create a lie.

DP. That is not the verb tense OP used. OP said, “ I feel fine and it’s not like I have shakes and am craving a drink today, so I’m still gonna say I haven’t been drinking for a month😁.”