Meet and greet with new babysitter (and other logistics)

[Anonymous]

Hi all - clueless FTM here looking to find a babysitter for occasional evenings for my infant. I am just curious about logistics for finding someone you trust, assuming you are finding them in places like care.com, babysitter FB groups, etc. Do you have a meet and greet? (Do you pay for it? Do you have it in your home?) How many references do you request/call? What questions do you ask the sitter before you work with them?

I’m probably overthinking but I’m nervous to leave baby with a non-family member!

[Anonymous]

I do a Facetime/phone call before meeting them. But otherwise I give them my address and stay for 5-10 mins to show them around, introduce them to kid, etc. when they first come -- but no "meet and greet" visit separate from the actual first date night. I did that (and requested references) only for a full-time nanny I hired (I checked 2-3 references for her too). For Care.com sitters I look at reviews. For sitters through neighborhood friends, etc. I take my friends' recs as sufficient vouching.

I have a large, tall, scary-looking husband and a Ring camera (outdoors at least) so I assume that's enough of a deterrent. I really don't think most people are out to steal from me or hurt my kid. Having a regular sitter rotation is wonderful, OP -- it'll be awesome for your marriage and quality of life!

Questions I ask sitters before they start:
-What is your rate? How would you like to be paid (cash, Venmo, etc.)?
-What kind of experience have you had with children? What ages?
-What kind of transportation will you use to get to my house? (Hiccup with some younger sitters -- they may want you to pay for Uber, drive them home, or rely on public transit that is often delayed. I'm car-free but find sitters with cars more reliable.)

I show them where everything is in the house, the Netflix/smart TV controls/wifi PW for when the kid is asleep, where to put dirty diapers. I leave two sheets of paper on the fridge: kid's routine/schedule and emergency info (phone numbers, backup contacts, any allergies/medical info, nearest hospital/ER).

My favorite sitters have generally been a bit older, taken a lot of initiative and sent me a few cute pics without bombarding me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do a Facetime/phone call before meeting them. But otherwise I give them my address and stay for 5-10 mins to show them around, introduce them to kid, etc. when they first come -- but no "meet and greet" visit separate from the actual first date night. I did that (and requested references) only for a full-time nanny I hired (I checked 2-3 references for her too). For Care.com sitters I look at reviews. For sitters through neighborhood friends, etc. I take my friends' recs as sufficient vouching.

I have a large, tall, scary-looking husband and a Ring camera (outdoors at least) so I assume that's enough of a deterrent. I really don't think most people are out to steal from me or hurt my kid. Having a regular sitter rotation is wonderful, OP -- it'll be awesome for your marriage and quality of life!

Questions I ask sitters before they start:
-What is your rate? How would you like to be paid (cash, Venmo, etc.)?
-What kind of experience have you had with children? What ages?
-What kind of transportation will you use to get to my house? (Hiccup with some younger sitters -- they may want you to pay for Uber, drive them home, or rely on public transit that is often delayed. I'm car-free but find sitters with cars more reliable.)

I show them where everything is in the house, the Netflix/smart TV controls/wifi PW for when the kid is asleep, where to put dirty diapers. I leave two sheets of paper on the fridge: kid's routine/schedule and emergency info (phone numbers, backup contacts, any allergies/medical info, nearest hospital/ER).

My favorite sitters have generally been a bit older, taken a lot of initiative and sent me a few cute pics without bombarding me.

Care.com reviews are not reliable. They started allowing anyone to post reviews, including people who aren't care.com members, so people had their friends blow up their pages with positive reviews. I was very disappointed with the two "5-star" nannies I found on care.com. They were both lazy and phone addicted.

[Anonymous]

I agree that Care.com is not reliable!

We typically do the first couple date nights after bedtime (our kids never wake during the night). So id put them to bed then the sitter would come and hand like 7:30-10:30 while we did a close by dinner. Once I knew they were reliable, punctual, etc we moved to them actually being with the kids and it's been great.

Ask what their policies are- cancellation, minimum number oof hours per booking, etc

[Anonymous]

With an infant, we waited until they were on a reliable sleep schedule (about 4 months) and then we had someone come over at bedtime so we could go out. That person has never needed to do anything other than keep an eye on the monitor, and we can still go out from 8-11 (and a lot of babies go down at 7, then you've really got a full evening).

[Anonymous]

Please find a neighbor, OP. Post “Babysitter Needed” signs, or post on your neighborhood listserv.

[Anonymous]

Thanks all - this is helpful. Good to know about Care.com. Any specific questions you ask their references beyond the obvious?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do a Facetime/phone call before meeting them. But otherwise I give them my address and stay for 5-10 mins to show them around, introduce them to kid, etc. when they first come -- but no "meet and greet" visit separate from the actual first date night. I did that (and requested references) only for a full-time nanny I hired (I checked 2-3 references for her too). For Care.com sitters I look at reviews. For sitters through neighborhood friends, etc. I take my friends' recs as sufficient vouching.

I have a large, tall, scary-looking husband and a Ring camera (outdoors at least) so I assume that's enough of a deterrent. I really don't think most people are out to steal from me or hurt my kid. Having a regular sitter rotation is wonderful, OP -- it'll be awesome for your marriage and quality of life!

Questions I ask sitters before they start:
-What is your rate? How would you like to be paid (cash, Venmo, etc.)?
-What kind of experience have you had with children? What ages?
-What kind of transportation will you use to get to my house? (Hiccup with some younger sitters -- they may want you to pay for Uber, drive them home, or rely on public transit that is often delayed. I'm car-free but find sitters with cars more reliable.)

I show them where everything is in the house, the Netflix/smart TV controls/wifi PW for when the kid is asleep, where to put dirty diapers. I leave two sheets of paper on the fridge: kid's routine/schedule and emergency info (phone numbers, backup contacts, any allergies/medical info, nearest hospital/ER).

My favorite sitters have generally been a bit older, taken a lot of initiative and sent me a few cute pics without bombarding me.

Care.com reviews are not reliable. They started allowing anyone to post reviews, including people who aren't care.com members, so people had their friends blow up their pages with positive reviews. I was very disappointed with the two "5-star" nannies I found on care.com. They were both lazy and phone addicted.

Different experience here. The three regular sitters/nannies I've found from there have been great. One of them I would love to hire as full-time nanny, just could not afford her rate. The only issue I've had with a Care.com sitter/nanny was one who would not get COVID vaccinated, and this was at a point in the pandemic where that was a make-or-break issue.