Help! Catholic funeral on Sat and need some advice

[Anonymous]

My brother-in-law recently passed and his funeral is on Saturday morning. It's in a Catholic church and they'll be doing a full mass. There will also be a viewing before the service at the church starting at 9 a.m. I'm trying to help my sister with some logistics here and we had a question as neither of us are Catholic.

For a viewing at the church in the morning, should we provide coffee and donuts or some other light breakfast fare? Or would that be considered wrong? After the burial we will all be returning to the church for a lunch but we weren't sure if we should also provide some sort of breakfast option?

Thanks for any advice!

[Anonymous]

They’re serving lunch IN the church? Somehow I doubt that.

[Anonymous]

The viewing is typically at a funeral home NOT the church. Usually water and tea and coffee during the viewing , which the funeral home will provide, but keep in mind the viewing is sorta an "open house" - type thing where people will mingle and pass through so no need to go overboard.

There's usually some sort of a reception after the burial (Mass, funeral procession to cemetery). Some opt to have it catered at a nearby restaurant or some opt to have light sandwiches at the funeral home at said cemetery (funeral homes have lots of rooms).

You really need to have your sister speak with the Church and funeral director. That's what they are there for . The funeral director can make some great suggestions and take on the logistics so she can focus on other things

[Anonymous]

Second what pp said. I wouldn’t expect food at the viewing. A hosted meal after the services and burial is common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They’re serving lunch IN the church? Somehow I doubt that.

It’s probably in a community room or basement of the church.

[Anonymous]

I’m from the northeast so I’m only familiar with viewings being held the couple of days before the burial. They are usually in the afternoon and evening, with a break in between. No food served.

[Anonymous]

Catholics fast for the period immediately before mass. So, there wouldn't be a tradition of food at that time.

A repast (meal) after in the church hall is pretty common.

[Anonymous]

No breakfast

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They’re serving lunch IN the church? Somehow I doubt that.

It’s probably in a community room or basement of the church.

That's where it was for the funeral mass I attended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My brother-in-law recently passed and his funeral is on Saturday morning. It's in a Catholic church and they'll be doing a full mass. There will also be a viewing before the service at the church starting at 9 a.m. I'm trying to help my sister with some logistics here and we had a question as neither of us are Catholic.

For a viewing at the church in the morning, should we provide coffee and donuts or some other light breakfast fare? Or would that be considered wrong? After the burial we will all be returning to the church for a lunch but we weren't sure if we should also provide some sort of breakfast option?

Thanks for any advice!

In my experience - the viewing at 9 is for family/those who are like family and is typically at a funeral home. They might have someone say a prayer and then the family will drive to the church. I have never experienced it where there is a viewing at a church prior to a mass - but this could be regional / driven by local customs. If you volunteered to help - just call the parish and they will help you and explain how things typically work.

I have gone back to the church for a lunch after the service at the cemetery. In my experience, this is hosted by the parish and is typically in what I call the "Church Hall" (as opposed to the physical building of the church). Typically the lunch is facilitated by a committee the church has established and they might have sandwiches available for people.

[Anonymous]

Agree with others, usually no food at the viewing (but we have food at a wake, which is a confusing distinction).

[Anonymous]

We had a wake at the funeral home for my dad the day before the funeral (no food) and then a contemplative hour in the chapel with the casket before the funeral and then the funeral and the reception in the church hall including a light lunch. All closed casket. Burial was family only later that day at Arlington.

There are different ways to go. Ask the pastor and funeral director for guidance.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been to a Catholic funeral recently and there was an open casket (viewing) at the church before the mass/funeral service, it was in the entry area or what you might call the lobby area. As a previous poster had said, usually the open casket is just at the funeral home where the wake is. But this was different from other Catholic funerals I have attended and sounds like what you are describing.

I would not feel obligated, or even like it was appropriate, to serve coffee or tea at this time. People can come in, greet the family, mill about in the lobby area, and then also proceed to the actual church area and sit in the pews before the service.

I’m sure the area at the church where you will be having lunch it’s not the same exact place where you’re having the mass. Most churches have like a community room or gathering space for exactly this type of thing.

Sounds like what has already been planned is spot on and you don’t need to do anything extra before the mass. That time before the mass is more somber so messing around with drinks or food would be unusual. People might need to use the bathroom beforehand and they can do that very easily. They will be coming straight from their cars or transportation so ostensibly they can take care of any caffeine/food/hydration needs beforehand.

After the funeral service and the burial is definitely the time when people probably would be looking for some food and beverages and connection and community—that tends to be less formal than everything else that day, which is usually just the right way to cap off the whole set of rituals.

Very sorry for your loss.

[Anonymous]

At both catholic funerals I've been to in the last few years, there was a viewing before the mass in the church, mass, burial and then a luncheon after. No food provided at viewing before the mass.

At previous catholic funerals I've attended, the viewing was at the funeral home the night before the mass/burial/luncheon. It's possible there were some refreshments, I don't remember. But if you go this route, the funeral home would guide you.

[Anonymous]

It is increasingly common for visitation to be at the Church. Sometimes there is a non-Mass liturgy. Sometimes things are less formal. You should ask the mortician to be sure, but given that it is in the morning right before Mass (again, increasingly common) it would be unusual to have food, both in light of the communion fast noted by a PP and because people would have to leave the visitation to go get it.