"Maybe she will decide to be the best mom ever and stay home..."

[Anonymous]

Said a friend in reference to another friend of ours who is pregnant. I was shocked and hurt at the assertion that in order to be the "best mom ever" you need to stay home?
Is this a common line of thought?

[Anonymous]

Whether or not she actually thinks being the best mother means doing nothing but that (either for this particular friend, or for all mothers in general), I really don't think she meant to criticize you, OP. If you really want to look for offense, you're going to find it every single day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whether or not she actually thinks being the best mother means doing nothing but that (either for this particular friend, or for all mothers in general), I really don't think she meant to criticize you, OP. If you really want to look for offense, you're going to find it every single day.

This. Calm down. Don’t try to make an issue out of nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whether or not she actually thinks being the best mother means doing nothing but that (either for this particular friend, or for all mothers in general), I really don't think she meant to criticize you, OP. If you really want to look for offense, you're going to find it every single day.

This. Run your own race. If someone isn’t talking about you, don’t find ways to make it about you. That’s just asking for trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Said a friend in reference to another friend of ours who is pregnant. I was shocked and hurt at the assertion that in order to be the "best mom ever" you need to stay home?
Is this a common line of thought?

OP are you a working mom?

[Anonymous]

Maybe she was being sarcastic

[Anonymous]

It’s just an off-note comment with no ill intent. You have to be able to let that sort of thing bounce off or you will make yourself miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Said a friend in reference to another friend of ours who is pregnant. I was shocked and hurt at the assertion that in order to be the "best mom ever" you need to stay home?
Is this a common line of thought?

I would take it to mean she will decide to quit work so she can devote all her energy to parenting and being a Pinterest-perfect SAHM. Not that she will actually BE the best mom ever.

[Anonymous]

I don’t get what’s so offensive about this. I say this as a working mom…unless your family is otherwise near poverty, you are going to be a better mother if you SAH. On the flip side, you are going to be a better doctor/lawyer/teacher/whatever if you forgo having a family in order to dedicate your life to your career.
Saying otherwise seems kind of presumptuous.

[Anonymous]

This is the kind of thing insecure stay at home moms say. Just ignore. Go take a look at your retirement account, you’ll feel better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Said a friend in reference to another friend of ours who is pregnant. I was shocked and hurt at the assertion that in order to be the "best mom ever" you need to stay home?
Is this a common line of thought?

I would take it to mean she will decide to quit work so she can devote all her energy to parenting and being a Pinterest-perfect SAHM. Not that she will actually BE the best mom ever.

This is actually how I would read it too. “Best Mom Ever” sounds like the mug on the office…

[Anonymous]

I am betting this was said somewhat tongue-in-cheek.

Think about this. What does it even mean to be the best mom ever? Every kid needs a different kind of mom. And, oh yeah, moms need stuff too. Where is dad in this? What if mom is pretty good and also has a great job so that she has a retirement fund and can put money away for college, and dad picks the kid up from school every day and teaches him to cook? Who is the "best mom ever" in that scenario? Sounds like a good deal.

Best mom ever is a chump title, basically. It's like the perfect attendance award. Good job, you did everything that everyone else wanted you to do! Congratulations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Said a friend in reference to another friend of ours who is pregnant. I was shocked and hurt at the assertion that in order to be the "best mom ever" you need to stay home?
Is this a common line of thought?

I would take it to mean she will decide to quit work so she can devote all her energy to parenting and being a Pinterest-perfect SAHM. Not that she will actually BE the best mom ever.

This is actually how I would read it too. “Best Mom Ever” sounds like the mug on the office…

That's how I'd take it too. Totally snarky comment about the friend. Is she already being an over-the-top "best pregnant woman ever"?

[Anonymous]

Your friend is not a nice person.

[Anonymous]

I think you do need to stay at home in order to be “the best mom ever.” That being said, you can be a pretty good mom without staying at home. I’m not sure that it’s worth giving up your entire adult life in order to be “the best mom.”