How long do you usually wait to to reply to a text from a relative or friend?

[Anonymous]

When a relative or a friend sends you a text to say hi with a general update or an invite to get together, how quickly do you usually reply?
How long is an acceptable response time, if the message doesn't need an urgent reply?
If you are the sender, how long do you wait before you phone the person?

My question is more about the etiquette of texting.

[Anonymous]

I think waiting more than 24 hours is too long. Within 2-3 hours is ok I think. But I dont text with too many people to know whats right or wrong.

[Anonymous]

I rarely have my phone near me, so I check it every few days when I think about it. By then there are various messages to prioritize, so often I never get around to it. If people are going to start making up rules of "etiquette" that require me to be tethered to a device, count me out.

[Anonymous]

check out the "one sided texting" thread. that might give you some insight.

[Anonymous]

Thanks. When I send a text to someone I typically give them 7 days to reply before I send a follow up message. I don't like phoning (unless it's super urgent) because people are working and they're busy on weekdays and they're busy again at weekends.

I don't always reply quickly either, especially when I'm tired or feeling low.

I do make an exception for elderly relatives, who prefer a phone call to a text.

[Anonymous]

It depends, if it is a quick answer usually I try and do it straight away. If it is more of a catching up text sometimes I have to be in the right frame of mind but I usually respond within 24 hrs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I rarely have my phone near me, so I check it every few days when I think about it. By then there are various messages to prioritize, so often I never get around to it. If people are going to start making up rules of "etiquette" that require me to be tethered to a device, count me out.

This is fascinating. May I ask how old you are? I have my phone on me all the time to ensure I get calls from children/ camps/ etc. therefore I’m prompt on replying. Do you use a landline or prefer people don’t contact you at all?

[Anonymous]

Personally, I respond same day, usually within a few hours. Most of my friends/relatives are texters like me so their response time is usually the same. I have one friend that might not respond until the following day and that's normal for her. There is no right or wrong answer to this, everyone is different. If you're texting someone that doesen't respond at all, takes a week, or always responds with one word and never initiates, well that's another issue. They either don't text or don't want to text with you.

[Anonymous]

I’ll be honest. It 100% depends on who s sending and what they are sending. My kids communicate via text so I always check it frequently unless I’m doing something outside, at the gym, r it isn’t charged.

Immediate response goes for things that are time sensitive and real questions from normal people only.

Several days or over a week go for people that are just sending an update on something I didn’t ask for an update, questions that I have already answered and sender is fishing for a different answer, or people I don’t like.

No response for people just sending cat pictures, randomness thoughts that don’t need a response or links to things.

[Anonymous]

I never purposely wait. It's not a game. But I don't have conversations over text. I'll exchange quick info or make plans by text, that's it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I rarely have my phone near me, so I check it every few days when I think about it. By then there are various messages to prioritize, so often I never get around to it. If people are going to start making up rules of "etiquette" that require me to be tethered to a device, count me out.

This is fascinating. May I ask how old you are? I have my phone on me all the time to ensure I get calls from children/ camps/ etc. therefore I’m prompt on replying. Do you use a landline or prefer people don’t contact you at all?

55, kids are teens. No landline. I don't need to be tethered to the kids by phone. They've never had trouble reaching me or spouse or getting our attention. Same with our parents before we had these phones. I guess we are in person with each other and our friends so often the phone just isn't the primary means of communicating?

[Anonymous]

OP.
And how about someone (friend) who used to reply within 24 hours, then 3 days, then a week, then 2 or 3 weeks, then only after prompting? This friend had a major operation 3 or 4 years ago- she was very unwell - and I don't know if I should ask her out again. She's perfectly friendly when I see her but she doesn't initiate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never purposely wait. It's not a game. But I don't have conversations over text. I'll exchange quick info or make plans by text, that's it.

Same but some people will pose questions as a way to get into a conversation. If it’s not a real question I will either not respond or wait a week, I don’t want to be dragged into a daily text conversation.

[Anonymous]

If it's something that merits a response, such as an actual invitation (a proposed date/time/location, not a "we should get together sometime), I respond within 24 hours.

If it is a picture of your lunch or "You should watch 'The New Show, It's Great'" I don't feel a response is always needed, and I frequently ignore. I don't like to text just to chat. If you want to call, call. If you want to meet, let's make a plan. I can't stand when people treat texts as social media, like I really don't care that you're at a concert.

[Anonymous]

Unless I’m traveling or something truly without phone access, I respond soon as I have time but always within the same day even if it’s to say I’ll get back to them later with specifics.