should I learn before signing up my kids for class?
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Anonymous
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My kids are scared and not willing to try many sports, like swimming, biking, ice skating, kid rock climbing, just like anything that is related to water/foot not touching the ground. They don't want to learn any musical instruments as well.
I can't do any of those above. And, they are not willing to let me signing them up for classes, and my oldest is 7, and youngest is 3. Should I just go ahead to take adult classes and learn them to prove them if I can do them, they can do that as well? I am interested in all the things I mention above, and I had taken some classes 10 plus years ago and I failed miserably. As parents, do you know many skills or classes that your kids are good at or know of? |
Anonymous
| Maybe find activities that your kids enjoy, rather than ones you think they should enjoy? |
Anonymous
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Everyone should know how to swim and ride a bike. Sign kids up for swim lessons even if they don't want to learn. Not saying they need to be competitive swimmers but they should absolutely learn.
I find it a little odd that your kids don't want to learn to do anything. Are there any activities they enjoy? |
Anonymous
| I should also add that sometimes kids are scared to try something new but once they do it they end up really enjoy it. It is always good to expose kids to new things, even things they are initially reluctant to try. They won't love everything but they may end up liking things they never thought they would. It is also great to build confidence by trying thigs you never thought you could do and succeeding. |
Anonymous
| Rock climbing is so random. Why must they take that? If you're interested, then you do it. |
Anonymous
| See if you can find all ages classes so they can so you being excited about learning too. When I was young and my parents washed us to start music, my mother started piano lessons at the same time as us and I think that kept me going longer than I would have without it. |
Anonymous
| I also think it can be cool to learn beside your kids and admit that you are nervous/scared too. My husband and I have bother learned to do new activities because of our kids. I learned to ski so I could go with my kids. They had learned to snowboard with their father a few years before I started. It has been good for them to see me overcome fears and progress. They love cheering me on, seeing how far I have come and that I can now keep up with them. |
Anonymous
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Swimming is a must--they don't have to have perfect form or be fast but they need to be able to not drown. And if you really can't swim, then yes, you should take a class too.
I think biking is a good thing to know as well (though the 3yo is still young for it of course). It's nice if you can do it because then you can bike together. But it's not a hill to die on for me like swimming is. Anything else, no, I don't feel compelled to learn. My daughter loves rock climbing and I'm terrified of heights so there's no way I'm doing that! I'm also pretty much tone deaf, so music lessons for me are also a non-starter. My kids have never wanted me to learn something with them though. We do plenty of activities and projects together, so they're happy to do other stuff without me. That said, we didn't really do much in the way of lessons until they were elementary school age. I'm a little surprised your 7yo isn't feeling peer pressure around swimming or riding a bike though. |
Anonymous
| Enroll them in the things they like, not things you want them to like. |
Anonymous
| My friend and her son recently both learned how to play chess. Seemed like a such a fun experience they shared. |
Anonymous
I think this is hard thought because kids don't always know what they like. You learn what you like by trying new things and moving out of your comfort zone. It sounds like OP's kids don't even want to try things. |
Anonymous
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op here. My 7 year old has a few interests which are chess, board games, weekly soccer class, playground, screen time and math workbooks. He does not want to try new things because he is scared and he also thinks that he can't do it or do well. He is also afraid of getting hurt.
DH is not pushing him to try new things, so it leaves me doing it or nothing will be done. I don't need him to be excel in that but I just want him to try to see if he likes it or at least have a taste what that is. He makes his little sister scared of trying many things because she imitates him. My 3 year old can climb up wall of 10 feet without any rope/help, and she is not scared of height and more fearless. |
Anonymous
Great advice. This was our experience. Also, could they do this activity with a classmate or daycare friend? That may help motivate them. And IMHO swimming is a must regardless of how much whining they do. |
Anonymous
sign him up. |
Anonymous
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Instead of signing up for classes, maybe you could do some low-level activities together, and then sign them up for the things they’re interested in. I agree that swimming is a must, for safety reasons. If necessary, start real slow, maybe a small, inflatable “pool” in the backyard to splash in (just don’t leave the 3 year old unattended), then work your way up to a public wading pool, before you even broach the subject of lessons.
For biking, the best way I’ve heard to learn is to take the pedals off the bike and get them used to balancing and coasting with their feet on the ground. You might try taking them on hikes at Great Falls and letting them scramble around on the rocks, but stay off the Billy Goat Trail. I recommend everyone check with the rangers before they try it to make sure they’re comfortable with the challenge level (I did it once and swore never again - admittedly I’m a wimp.). Since your kids are scared to begin with, that is not where you want to start easing them into things. Just do things for fun before even thinking about classes. Look at YouTube videos and try dancing/martial arts in the living room. Get a ball/frisbee/kite and play in the back yard or park. Get some play skates (and helmets), and skate around the neighborhood. (Pads may help them feel better). Gymnastics centers may have open gyms where kids can bounce on a trampoline, jump in a foam pit, balance on a beam on the floor, etc., in an unstructured, fun atmosphere for an hour or two versus a formal lesson. Maybe try bowling with bumpers or take them to a bounce place. Just get them used to having fun doing new things. Don’t worry about teaching them an instrument if they’re not interested. When they’re older (4th grade in MCPS), the school will offer opportunities and they can pick an instrument then. In the meantime, play different types of music and dance around the house, sing together, take them places to hear music (libraries, festivals, etc.). Give them ways to make music (toy drums, harmonicas, kazoos, xylophones, keyboards, etc.) as long as the music is coming from them and not pre-programmed music that plays automatically. If you want to take lessons for your own edification, I think it would be great if they saw you enjoying the experience of music and sharing it with them, but if you’re enduring it just to ser them an example, I think it will be counterproductive. Look at events at libraries, museums, nature centers, rec centers, craft stores, hardware stores, sports places, etc. Check the bulletin boards at the library. You might go through the catalog of classes offered by your local recreation department and see if there’s any that appeal to them (or you), but just do things that sound like fun. I don’t think you have to excel in things to motivate your kids. In fact, showing them that you can enjoy doing thimgs you don’t excel at might be more motivating. Just keep it fun and encourage whatever interests they develop. |