4yo talks nonstop, it's driving me bonkers

[Anonymous]

She's funny and sweet and I enjoy a lot of what she's saying but the near constant stream of consciousness talking is driving me up the wall. There's also a decent amount of whining mixed in sometimes and that's especially irritating, but really it's just that I would like a break from the sound of her voice. I find myself tuning her out all the time. I feel terrible about it but it's just so hard to listen to someone talk nonstop from sun up to sun down. Really feeling it on a rainy Saturday.

Are other people's preschoolers like this? Can people with older kids say whether a talker like this eventually... stops talking so much. We've discussed the idea that she doesn't have to share all her thoughts, that sometimes she can just keep them to herself. It hasn't sunk in yet. Is there any other way to get her to talk less without, you know, crushing her spirit? Love her so much, just need a little peace and quiet.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Mine drove me insane! And then in 10 years she won’t speak much. So record her now so you can look back. 💗

[Anonymous]

lol yes!
my kid talks all the time, asks me dozens of questions throughout the day.

[Anonymous]

ADHD. That was my kid too!

[Anonymous]

My mom says I was like this until I turned 8. Then I barely spoke again until I turned 18.

[Anonymous]

My oldest in particular was a talker at that age. Talked all.the.time. She slowed down some when she learned to read, which was mercifully around age 5. She still talks a lot, at age 10, but the benefit is that I know what’s going on with her and her friends, when most of the moms of her friends say their daughters don’t say a word to them.

I also have two boys, ages 8 and 6, who can talk a lot, if not quite as much as DD. I’m a psychologist by training, and am starting to wonder if I took “listen so kids will talk” to an extreme, haha.

[Anonymous]

Does she take a nap still? If not, does she have alone/quiet time in her room? That helps with my 4yo! Still a work in progress because she continues to come out of her room to ask questions, even though she has an okay to wake timer and knows she’s supposed to wait until the end of quiet time to ask.

I can’t say it slows down any time soon. My oldest is 6 and he is still very chatty. He loves to talk about sports and ask me endless questions about certain teams, who they are playing next, what time is the game, etc — and I really don’t keep up with sports! I do my best to feign interest, but I don’t worry about tuning him out. I love that he’s so into it, but I agree it’s exhausting to hear someone else’s voice all day!

[Anonymous]

Mine hasn’t stopped talking in 10 years.

10
Years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:ADHD. That was my kid too!

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's funny and sweet and I enjoy a lot of what she's saying but the near constant stream of consciousness talking is driving me up the wall. There's also a decent amount of whining mixed in sometimes and that's especially irritating, but really it's just that I would like a break from the sound of her voice. I find myself tuning her out all the time. I feel terrible about it but it's just so hard to listen to someone talk nonstop from sun up to sun down. Really feeling it on a rainy Saturday.

Are other people's preschoolers like this? Can people with older kids say whether a talker like this eventually... stops talking so much. We've discussed the idea that she doesn't have to share all her thoughts, that sometimes she can just keep them to herself. It hasn't sunk in yet. Is there any other way to get her to talk less without, you know, crushing her spirit? Love her so much, just need a little peace and quiet.

No advice for the chattiness but starve the whining for attention. “I can’t understand what you need when you whine.” Then, unless she’s in some sort of direct physical danger, walk away. Do this every time and be consistent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine hasn’t stopped talking in 10 years.

10
Years

And yes mine is adhd too.

[Anonymous]

My daughter talked nonstop too. She even talked nonstop alone playing with her dolls, etc. Actually from the time she could babble until 9 or 10 years old NONSTOP!! She got more shy as she matured. Now I LOVE our conversations. She's so articulate and thoughtful.

.....and yes I tuned her out too. It's survival mode. Don't feel bad about it. Just say yes and repeat something every now and again. Mine didn't even notice I wasn't listening.

[Anonymous]

Ha. My parents would pay me to be quiet on long car rides.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter talked nonstop too. She even talked nonstop alone playing with her dolls, etc. Actually from the time she could babble until 9 or 10 years old NONSTOP!! She got more shy as she matured. Now I LOVE our conversations. She's so articulate and thoughtful.

.....and yes I tuned her out too. It's survival mode. Don't feel bad about it. Just say yes and repeat something every now and again. Mine didn't even notice I wasn't listening.

OP here and yes, my DD also talks the whole time when she’s playing on her own! A lot if it is adorable (she makes up songs and stories and some of them are epic) but it definitely adds to that feeling like she never, ever stops talking.

I am grateful for it sometimes. She tells me everything that happens at school, for instance. Some of my friends complain they have no idea what goes on at preschool versus daycare, when they got more info from teachers. But DD downloads her whole day to me every day. I guess at least she feels comfortable talking to me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine hasn’t stopped talking in 10 years.

10
Years

13 years here. We call it radio mode. Its like a switch has been flipped. Just straight monologues. I wonder if she’s getting enough air (kidding)

ADHD and ASD.