How to talk to worried teen about the future of this country/world

[Anonymous]

My 16 y/o DD recently learned that Roe v Wade will likely be repealed this summer and she is really upset and confused how/why it is happening. With this, all the weird stuff happening in Florida, climate change, and the war in Ukraine she admitted that she’s really stressed out about what her future looks like.

Of course, these things and more keep me up at night too, but I didn’t tell her that.

We don’t watch the news at home ever, so she’s hearing about this through social media. I told her that we all need to limit the doom scrolling and focus on enjoying the here and now because most of it is far beyond our control. I stressed the importance of voting. Besides getting her offline as much as possible, what can I do?

Please, I don’t want this to be a political discussion. It just kills me to see my kid already feeling the weight of the world and I don’t know how to help.

[Anonymous]

Tell her to get off social media, and maybe have her see a therapist if you think that would help. And also, get her involved in clubs and programs. It will either keep her busy or she may feel like she is contributing to making the world better.

[Anonymous]

It’s adolescence, OP. I’m the grandmother of a teen and I was just telling him what the Vietnam lottery was like. How we all sad glued to the TV knowing that the first fifty birthdays they called would be going off to Viet Nam. My brother’s birthday was called eleventh and he was drafted. He survived Viet Nam but was definitely changed by it. Our next door neighbor was an early birthday and never came home. I told him what it was like to campaign for Bobby Kennedy and celebrate his winning the California primary when someone walked into the room sobbing that he’d just been shot in the head and died. My dad used to tell stories about the Great Depression when no one had shoes or enough to eat. And then the rising fear of Hitler and the telegram received after his high school graduation that started, “Now is the time for all good men…”.

Avoiding the truths of the world does no one good. Tell your child to be the change she wants to see in the world and get busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s adolescence, OP. I’m the grandmother of a teen and I was just telling him what the Vietnam lottery was like. How we all sad glued to the TV knowing that the first fifty birthdays they called would be going off to Viet Nam. My brother’s birthday was called eleventh and he was drafted. He survived Viet Nam but was definitely changed by it. Our next door neighbor was an early birthday and never came home. I told him what it was like to campaign for Bobby Kennedy and celebrate his winning the California primary when someone walked into the room sobbing that he’d just been shot in the head and died. My dad used to tell stories about the Great Depression when no one had shoes or enough to eat. And then the rising fear of Hitler and the telegram received after his high school graduation that started, “Now is the time for all good men…”.

Avoiding the truths of the world does no one good. Tell your child to be the change she wants to see in the world and get busy.

This post is a gift! Thank you!

[Anonymous]

I do think it’s good to put things in perspective for teens-global warming is scary, political disagreements run high, but on the other in this country hand strep throat is very unlikely to kill you and you likely won’t bury 10 of your thirteen children before you die at 42.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s adolescence, OP. I’m the grandmother of a teen and I was just telling him what the Vietnam lottery was like. How we all sad glued to the TV knowing that the first fifty birthdays they called would be going off to Viet Nam. My brother’s birthday was called eleventh and he was drafted. He survived Viet Nam but was definitely changed by it. Our next door neighbor was an early birthday and never came home. I told him what it was like to campaign for Bobby Kennedy and celebrate his winning the California primary when someone walked into the room sobbing that he’d just been shot in the head and died. My dad used to tell stories about the Great Depression when no one had shoes or enough to eat. And then the rising fear of Hitler and the telegram received after his high school graduation that started, “Now is the time for all good men…”.

Avoiding the truths of the world does no one good. Tell your child to be the change she wants to see in the world and get busy.

This post is a gift! Thank you!

+1. It’s giving perspective and helping them take action.

[Anonymous]

Yep, listen and take action (more than just voting). Social media is actually helpful in making change happen and finding where for her to get involved. I’

I really think we’re failing our kids by coddling them and putting them on medication when we could be empowering them. Enough with the terminal uniqueness of this generation. Every generation had challenges. Things are certainly not the bleakest that they have ever been - not by a long shot.

PS my mother’s first boyfriend was one of the first birthday’s called in the lottery. He was sent to Viet Nam at just 18 and died there. Now that’s something to stress about!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 16 y/o DD recently learned that Roe v Wade will likely be repealed this summer and she is really upset and confused how/why it is happening. With this, all the weird stuff happening in Florida, climate change, and the war in Ukraine she admitted that she’s really stressed out about what her future looks like.

Of course, these things and more keep me up at night too, but I didn’t tell her that.

We don’t watch the news at home ever, so she’s hearing about this through social media. I told her that we all need to limit the doom scrolling and focus on enjoying the here and now because most of it is far beyond our control. I stressed the importance of voting. Besides getting her offline as much as possible, what can I do?

Please, I don’t want this to be a political discussion. It just kills me to see my kid already feeling the weight of the world and I don’t know how to help.

[Anonymous]

You are doing your teen a huge disservice in telling her to stop looking at things that scare her. Tell her to get to work changing the country and do not buy into the lie that our kids hard it so hard!! Enough. Tell her to get off her ass and do something. And so should you.

[Anonymous]

I like the Obama quote about the arc of history bending towards justice. I think it is generally true but it’s hard to feel it when we’re in a moment where it feels like it’s heading in the wrong direction.
This is weird but if you watch things like game of thrones and think about the fact that it actually represents the dominant thinking about torture, rape, murder, etc., just a thousand years ago….it does make you feel like we are making some progress. The more history you read the more you realize the curve of the arc.

[Anonymous]

Your 16 YO daughter is worried about Roe being overturned, and you don't see that you have a bigger problem? smh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your 16 YO daughter is worried about Roe being overturned, and you don't see that you have a bigger problem? smh

Stop. You’re just embarrassing yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We don’t watch the news at home ever, so she’s hearing about this through social media.

I think it can be helpful and important to talk about current events, with a little of the history and current context. And yes, reminding kids that every generation has had things to stress about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your 16 YO daughter is worried about Roe being overturned, and you don't see that you have a bigger problem? smh

I would if she WASN’T worried.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the wisdom of the Grandmother PP. Also, if there are issues of particular importance to your daughter, maybe she can find a way to get involved. Feeling powerless exacerbates anxiety and depression. It can help to take action, working with like-minded people.