How do you split the bill when going out with friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

Lobbyists, lawyers, hedge fund managers, traders, surgeons, sales people, executives can all earn high six figures or seven figures.

We had a family friend who had a newspaper stand who earned about 400k. You would be surprised at how much people who own multiple franchises earn.

I agree with you -- the money IS out there. But there is a reason that those income ranges are the top 1% or top 0.5% nationally -- it's actual statistic, not something we just say. So all I'm saying is that with the number of people on DCUM consistently claiming to be at $1 million or $800k or whatever, it would require that every 0.5%-er in the country is on DCUM every day on the Money forum or the parenting forums or whatever. Seems unlikely bc not all of those 0.5%ers live in DC or even on the east coast and you'd think at least some of them have something better to do -- work; vacation; shop, whatever.

The DC area seems to have a lot of country club and families who can pay 30k for private school. They all have money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

Lobbyists, lawyers, hedge fund managers, traders, surgeons, sales people, executives can all earn high six figures or seven figures.

We had a family friend who had a newspaper stand who earned about 400k. You would be surprised at how much people who own multiple franchises earn.

I agree with you -- the money IS out there. But there is a reason that those income ranges are the top 1% or top 0.5% nationally -- it's actual statistic, not something we just say. So all I'm saying is that with the number of people on DCUM consistently claiming to be at $1 million or $800k or whatever, it would require that every 0.5%-er in the country is on DCUM every day on the Money forum or the parenting forums or whatever. Seems unlikely bc not all of those 0.5%ers live in DC or even on the east coast and you'd think at least some of them have something better to do -- work; vacation; shop, whatever.

The DC area seems to have a lot of country club and families who can pay 30k for private school. They all have money.

Geez. It seems like I just suck. Better get to bed so I can get back to my $40k/year grind tomorrow morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Split it, evenly, down the middle. Nothing infuriates me more than women who insist on itemizing. "You had the steak but I only had the salad and water ..." AHHHHHHHHHH!

That's probably because you are ordering the steak and she is getting the salad and water. Pay your own way. I pay my share, taxes and tip. You pay yours.

I was going to say the same thing - it is always the people who order more who want to split the check evenly. I never talk about my money issues, but there's a reason I order an appetizer as my main dish and only get water, and no dessert.

You are the cheap one. Stay home.
Signed, waiter.

[Anonymous]

With most of the groups I go out with, we all just throw in what we owe. Now that we're all in our late 30's-early 50's, we have more money and the tab almost always comes out a few dollars over the tab + 20% tip. I can't remember the last time we had to dig for extra money.

A lot of waiters will do separate checks without asking and I love that, though I do try to bring cash whenever I'm going out with a big group, to make it easier on the server.

I'll split the check if it's just a few of us and we ordered similarly. But with a big group, what people order can be very different, especially with liquor in the mix.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With most of the groups I go out with, we all just throw in what we owe. Now that we're all in our late 30's-early 50's, we have more money and the tab almost always comes out a few dollars over the tab + 20% tip. I can't remember the last time we had to dig for extra money.

A lot of waiters will do separate checks without asking and I love that, though I do try to bring cash whenever I'm going out with a big group, to make it easier on the server.

I'll split the check if it's just a few of us and we ordered similarly. But with a big group, what people order can be very different, especially with liquor in the mix.

YEs, I say this is how I knew we were finally grown up -- when there is extra money and everyone just says to leave it for the server. When we were young, it was really annoying, because the total would come up short and you'd look around and think, "Which one of these friends is a cheap glass bowl?"

[Anonymous]

Either separate checks or even split.

[Anonymous]

Usually split the bill. But with the people we go out with most often, if one person drank more or ordered significantly more food, they say, "I'll go ahead and leave the tip for the entire table." It works out.

[Anonymous]

Depends on who I'm going with and how often. But usually, we split it down the middle but my group doesn't usually drink any alcohol and we tend to order the same types of things so price is not dramatic.

If I'm going with folks who I know are cheap then I'll get a separate check.

[Anonymous]

We pay for what we eat or drink. If the restaurant can't split the bill, one person pays and we Venmo her. Maybe it is a generational thing, but in my circle of friends splitting a bill evenly just isn't something that's done.

[Anonymous]

White friends, separate bill, or that pile of cash on the table at the end thing.

Asian friends, we fight for the check and take turns paying. No one keeps count.

[Anonymous]

I pay for my stuff plus a tip unless I'm treating my friend to eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With most of the groups I go out with, we all just throw in what we owe. Now that we're all in our late 30's-early 50's, we have more money and the tab almost always comes out a few dollars over the tab + 20% tip. I can't remember the last time we had to dig for extra money.

A lot of waiters will do separate checks without asking and I love that, though I do try to bring cash whenever I'm going out with a big group, to make it easier on the server.

I'll split the check if it's just a few of us and we ordered similarly. But with a big group, what people order can be very different, especially with liquor in the mix.

YEs, I say this is how I knew we were finally grown up -- when there is extra money and everyone just says to leave it for the server. When we were young, it was really annoying, because the total would come up short and you'd look around and think, "Which one of these friends is a cheap glass bowl?"

Great typo!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With most of the groups I go out with, we all just throw in what we owe. Now that we're all in our late 30's-early 50's, we have more money and the tab almost always comes out a few dollars over the tab + 20% tip. I can't remember the last time we had to dig for extra money.

A lot of waiters will do separate checks without asking and I love that, though I do try to bring cash whenever I'm going out with a big group, to make it easier on the server.

I'll split the check if it's just a few of us and we ordered similarly. But with a big group, what people order can be very different, especially with liquor in the mix.

YEs, I say this is how I knew we were finally grown up -- when there is extra money and everyone just says to leave it for the server. When we were young, it was really annoying, because the total would come up short and you'd look around and think, "Which one of these friends is a cheap glass bowl?"

Great typo!

It's a Carolyn Hax expression, not a typo. Wish I could remember to use it in real life in the heat of the moment!

[Anonymous]

Divide by 2?

[Anonymous]

I always get separate checks because my friends always drink when I go out with them, but I won't drink and drive, so I almost never drink. Often their drinks alone total at least an extra $30 per person. They don't seem to have a problem with everyone paying their exact share. We all don't have gobs of money to throw around so they understand that it's unfair to make me (or someone else not drinking) pay $30+ extra.