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No idea where to begin! My DD is just at the start of high school, but I can’t believe how much I’m already hearing about college. Sounds like a totally different scene than when I was applying. What’s important to know?
Also, I hear people talking about ultra high SAT scores in this area. In my day, the kids who got 1400 or 1500 were rare, even at top prep high schools. What’s changed? Any advice welcome! |
| If you are looking for what college admissions was like in 1985, you have come to the right place. |
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Don’t take what you hear on the boards too seriously (ie take everything but esp the more extreme things with lots of salt).
Be upfront about your budget and what schools are in range for it— and understand likely costs by checking on net price calculators. Can start trying to find opportunities to check out campuses, so your child can start to understand urban vs rural etc., but otherwise I wouldn’t focus on it too much right now. |
| Take the snobs and try-hards in this forum with a gigantic grain of salt. There's more to choosing a college than reputation, and the vast majority of kids are not going to attend an "elite" university - or even want to. |
| Take the advice offered on this board with a large grain of salt. |
I'm sensing a theme here.
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| Try searching through fairly recent threads - there have been several what I wish I had known when my kid started this process posts. |
| Agreed this forum is not the place to get honest and candid feedback. It seems full of people whose kids have 5.0 GPA and 1590 SAT with an axe to grind because they didn’t get into their birthright university. If you want honesty, talk to your HS college counselor and other upper-classman parents who have actually gone through the process at your school and maybe a college consultant. If you get anchored to realistic expectations earlier in the process, it doesn’t come as quite the shock later on. |
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To me, the biggest change is how many versions of early results there are. It’s now a multi-stage process for many kids, with lots of trade-offs involved. At a minimum, it makes sense to apply to one (private and/or reach) school EA (non-binding) and to any public school DC is interested in that has early notification or rolling admissions by late October. If your kid is eligible (typically high stats plus some element(s) of low income/first gen/underrepresented), make sure you check out Questbridge at the beginning of junior year.
When I applied, my parents’ attitude was use the best state school you will get into as a baseline and you’ll have to justify anything more expensive than that. I still think that’s not a bad model, especially for kids/families looking to avoid or minimize debt. But below a certain HHI level, privates with generous financial aid may now be cheaper than most public schools. The most sensible process/strategy is often really income-differentiated, with at least 3 scenarios (FA, “merit” aid, full pay). Merit aid basically functions as a discount to induce kids whose stats or demographics are better than/different from the norm at any particular college to head to a place that their parents wouldn’t otherwise be willing to pay full freight for. Can be a great choice (saves money and means your kid is likely to be high-performing) if the school is appealing, given your kid’s aspirations and interests. |
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Be realistic when creating a college list.
Acceptance rates play a much bigger part than you might think. Just bc a student seems to fit a school's profile, if a ton of people apply, many qualified students will be deferred/waitlisted/denied. Don't be caught off guard by this. Check acceptance rates in each school's CDS (common data set). Don't believe google searches of acceptance rates. Reaches are reaches for absolutely everyone. Determine targets and safeties not just by your child's stats, but by acceptance rates. Don't assume a school is a target bc your child's stats seem to exceed their range. Help your child see that that there are so many options for them, not just their "dream school". Many gems await! Many kind folks on this board. Best to you and yours! |
Also know that public high schools don’t have budgets for decent college counselors- so don’t actually depend on them for anything. And college consultants cost an arm and a leg. |
| Don’t get too caught up in prestige, just let your kid find the best fit. |
| When my DC was in middle school (a small catholic), DC and one other child were the tippy top of the class. By HS, it was clear that her friend was the one truly insanely gifted both intellectually and from a work ethic perspective. Scored 1590 in the SAT. Fast forward to college applications and her friend had her choice of 5 ivys, Georgetown and Tufts. My DC applied to the second tier down and with a mid 1400’s, had many choices herself. They were genuinely happy for each other and they each targeted the right set of schools for them. The safety’s for her friend were my DC’s reaches - but all good! It all worked out! My advice is, if you have a ‘smart’ kid, really get a handle on just how smart. Don’t overreach. Don’t compare. Know your kid. Help them navigate the insane process that is college applications. There will be an awesome set of reach target and safety schools for your kid and if you do it right, you’ll have choices. |
| 100% |
| Stop researching, talking about and thinking about college at this age. Let them be in high school and be in the moment. Appreciate today and not stress about tomorrow. It's a huge life lesson, and one kids need these days. |