my sister said to me...

[Anonymous]

I am a size 12. Not small but not obese. I used to be thinner. My sister is the same size as me.

My dh makes good money, maybe not by DCUM standards.
Anyway, my sister looks at me and is telling me I should lose weight. She is obsessed with weight- everyones weight. Then she says " aren't you afraid DH will leave you for someone thinner?" I said no.

Anyway, why the hell.would she say that? To try to make me insecure?

[Anonymous]

Why didn’t you ask her why she doesn’t lose weight? After all her husband is sure to dump her for her weight and attitude.

[Anonymous]

"I'm not discussing my weight with you."

[If she persists]

"Karen, are you feeling self-conscious about your weight? It seems like you are really focused on weight, and are trying to project that onto me. I already said I'm not discussing my weight with you. This topic is taking up a lot of space in your head, but not in mine."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a size 12. Not small but not obese. I used to be thinner. My sister is the same size as me.

My dh makes good money, maybe not by DCUM standards.
Anyway, my sister looks at me and is telling me I should lose weight. She is obsessed with weight- everyones weight. Then she says " aren't you afraid DH will leave you for someone thinner?" I said no.

Anyway, why the hell.would she say that? To try to make me insecure?

Probably because she's afraid of the same thing, and she's hoping you can commiserate.

I would say "Is that something you worry about? I actually don't worry about that."

If she says yes then you can give her some moral support because that's a terrible thought to have rolling around in your head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a size 12. Not small but not obese. I used to be thinner. My sister is the same size as me.

My dh makes good money, maybe not by DCUM standards.
Anyway, my sister looks at me and is telling me I should lose weight. She is obsessed with weight- everyones weight. Then she says " aren't you afraid DH will leave you for someone thinner?" I said no.

Anyway, why the hell.would she say that? To try to make me insecure?

Probably because she's afraid of the same thing, and she's hoping you can commiserate.

I would say "Is that something you worry about? I actually don't worry about that."

If she says yes then you can give her some moral support because that's a terrible thought to have rolling around in your head.

+1

[Anonymous]

She's got a sad life if that's how she thinks about people, herself included. I would just feel very sorry for her and not give it another thought.

[Anonymous]

What does your DH's income have to do with anything?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does your DH's income have to do with anything?

She was definitely alluding to the fact that he has options and is a good catch.

She doesn't know what he makes but we do okay financially

[Anonymous]

12 isn't obese?

how tall are you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a size 12. Not small but not obese. I used to be thinner. My sister is the same size as me.

My dh makes good money, maybe not by DCUM standards.
Anyway, my sister looks at me and is telling me I should lose weight. She is obsessed with weight- everyones weight. Then she says " aren't you afraid DH will leave you for someone thinner?" I said no.

Anyway, why the hell.would she say that? To try to make me insecure?

He husband was too friendly with a thinner woman. It is not personal if she is doing it to everyone. Quite frankly it sounds like personality and tact isn't her forte, but how is your relationship otherwise? I know my older brother and I look like twins and when I saw a photo of him with my near identical face atop a chubby body, it freaked me out that would be me soon like nothing else. A sibling is the single best motivator there is her doctor or husband's AF told her to. One guy said when he saw his rip twin, he finally said no more excuses and committed to healthier living. If she's normally no like this, try to move past her foot-in-mouth insensitive comment in case her husband is leaving her or her doctor is making her lose weight. If and only if she is really alright, tell her how insensitive her comment was and to next time be straight with you because you'll always be there for her.

If she's normally a jerk, the issue is her. It sounds like you have an enviable life--devoted unshallow husband and financial security. Don't sweat it OP-size 12 is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a size 12. Not small but not obese. I used to be thinner. My sister is the same size as me.

My dh makes good money, maybe not by DCUM standards.
Anyway, my sister looks at me and is telling me I should lose weight. She is obsessed with weight- everyones weight. Then she says " aren't you afraid DH will leave you for someone thinner?" I said no.

Anyway, why the hell.would she say that? To try to make me insecure?

Probably because she's afraid of the same thing, and she's hoping you can commiserate.

I would say "Is that something you worry about? I actually don't worry about that."

If she says yes then you can give her some moral support because that's a terrible thought to have rolling around in your head.

You sound like such a nice person. That is a great way to frame it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:12 isn't obese?

how tall are you?

i am 5 ft 9 in

[Anonymous]

In my limited experience, sisters can be the biggest assholes in the room.

[Anonymous]

Hmm. Most women in my family are like this, OP. Obsessed with weight. My mother is significantly underweight. She considers anyone plumper as FAT. And that, to her, is worse than death.

So... learn to ignore, I guess?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my limited experience, sisters can be the biggest assholes in the room.

+1