if you have a super stubborn kid who didn't want to potty train - when / how did you finally do it

[Anonymous]

Tried when ds2 was 2.75 and he was ok for 2 days and then on the 3rd day absolutely refused to sit on the potty and would just go on the floor. no bribes etc could get him to budge so i decided to wait. now at 3.25 he's clearly physically ready but a hard no on sitting on the potty for any incentive (screen time, treats etc). I've mainly stopped talking about it other than to neutrally say he can do certain things he wants to do that his older brother does once he's potty trained (eg "yeah baseball would be really fun. the class is only for potty trained kids, so we'll have to wait")

I'm going to need to force it by this summer for a school he's starting in the fall....and i'm very very nervous it'll be a battle of wills that i can't win

[Anonymous]

Do you have a relative that is a potty training wiz? My aunt is a potty training wizard. Like, you leave your kids with her and they magically come back completely potty trained

[Anonymous]

First, get a big reward in a box with the picture on it that he can open when he’s in underwear. The Hot Wheels Garage worked for my son.

Second, no more diapers. Use up the box you have telling him at every change that they’re almost all gone. Start changing him in the bathroom where the potty is.

Third, just put him in u dearest when you’re out and bare butt when you’re home. Make clean up from a potty accident take forever and involve a shower off.

Nothing punitive. Take a totally neutral “this is how it is” stance. And stick with it.

No diapers at naps either. I’d advise no diapers at night just until he’s using the potty but that not for the faint of heart.

And stop asking him to use the potty. Act like you don’t care. But keep reminding him of how long clean up takes and the big reward when he’s in underwear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First, get a big reward in a box with the picture on it that he can open when he’s in underwear. The Hot Wheels Garage worked for my son.

Second, no more diapers. Use up the box you have telling him at every change that they’re almost all gone. Start changing him in the bathroom where the potty is.

Third, just put him in u dearest when you’re out and bare butt when you’re home. Make clean up from a potty accident take forever and involve a shower off.

Nothing punitive. Take a totally neutral “this is how it is” stance. And stick with it.

No diapers at naps either. I’d advise no diapers at night just until he’s using the potty but that not for the faint of heart.

And stop asking him to use the potty. Act like you don’t care. But keep reminding him of how long clean up takes and the big reward when he’s in underwear.

This. Pick a day when the diapers are gone, remind your kid continually, and stick with it. Do not waver. You have one shot for this method to work.

[Anonymous]

You have to convince them that they want to (not that you want them to). Figure out something that everyone in the house using the potty gets for using the potty, and they too can have it when they go to the potty (peer pressure in a good way).

Maybe it is special soap for handwashing afterward (doesn't this smell good? Oh, only people who use the potty can use the vanilla sugar soap), or a food item they covet (oh, the big bag of chocolates are only for people who use the potty), etc. You have to figure out what motivates them.

[Anonymous]

Making them responsible for cleaning up did it for us. Kid had to take off wet clothes , rinse, and bring to washer. Get dry clothes and put on. No attention from parents. Even better if parent can be doing something fun while ignoring..

[Anonymous]

Get rid of all diapers. It’s use the potty or deal with a long, boring clean up.

[Anonymous]

We made our son sit on the toilet in his diaper when he had to go #2. At one point cut a hole in the back of the diaper, and then he realized it did not hurt to poop in the toilet. Don't know where he got that idea initially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of all diapers. It’s use the potty or deal with a long, boring clean up.

This. For us it’s not optional and it’s no turning back. I also follow the “start no later than 27 months” rule but that ship has sailed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of all diapers. It’s use the potty or deal with a long, boring clean up.

This. For us it’s not optional and it’s no turning back. I also follow the “start no later than 27 months” rule but that ship has sailed.

^^^we did the naked method.

[Anonymous]

https://www.babycenter.com/child/potty-training/potty-training-in-three-days-or-less_10310078

But it’s less likely to work after 3 because kids get way more stubborn.

[Anonymous]

We just got rid of all the diapers cold turkey. He got it fast but then became quite resistant for a several week period. It was hard. Sometimes I cried about his stubbornness at night. But we didn’t back down, and eventually he just stopped resisting, ironically right when his baby sister was born. He just started going voluntarily most of the time. So glad we didn’t quit.

We had some particularly BAD moments too, like a couple times where he deliberately peed on the floor out of rage. Potty training sucks, hang in there.

[Anonymous]

Our DD is also very strong-willed and I dropped the rope (full confession: I am a big rope-dropper, and get that this is not everyone's personality). Over the year when she was 3 she slowly started asking to wear panties and to go to the bathroom more and more. In our case it seemed a big tipping point was when I bought her a bunch of 'princess' dresses from Target as she told me quite seriously that "princesses don't wear diapers." I let her wear those princess dresses freaking everywhere! She just turned 4 and diapers have fully gone away without any fuss or stress.

I also noticed she would cue into what other kids around her were doing on playdates. I think there's a really strong chance that, given your kid *knows* how to use the potty, he'll do it once he's in school in a way he may not do around you at home. It's remarkable how strongly we humans are influenced by our peers.