How Often do you throw out “stuff”?

[Anonymous]

Since becoming a mom, stuff keeps coming into my house. Kid gets a gift in the mail every other day, and out grows clothes constantly, and im finding that I am just pushing things into corners. Are you doing a good job keeping kid stuff to a minimal or are you becoming a corner pusher?

My house used to be so neat.

[Anonymous]

I feel like I can embrace every other aspects of parenting except for the "stuff." I get done in by sentimentality, not wanting to be wasteful, and seeing the potential in every random thing to become a future arts and craft project or useful in some other way.

[Anonymous]

All. The. Time.

Embrace that you will regret some of the stuff you get rid of. You may have to re-buy some things. That is okay and worth it.

[Anonymous]

I struggle so much with the The Stuff. I've found it has gotten a little better as my kids have gotten older (like 3+) - clothes get ruined vs. being reusable, they move from mega-blocks/duplos to legos, they're doing 100+ piece puzzles instead of 24, etc. But it's still a challenge.

I do find I do better if I have good destinations for stuff (bonus if I can make some money). For example, a multiples club consignment sale, a neighborhood listserv where I can sell stuff for a bit here and there. Or a donation/giveaway destination where I know it will be put to good use - for example, a group that gives to kids in my community, my Buy Nothing group, sibling/friends kid, a family who fits well with us for hand me downs. And I try to make regular rotations to the clothing recycling bin (for rag/recycles stuff and shoes) and keep a donation box going to get rid of every few weeks.

But it's still a daily battle against the stuff. And we're losing.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand this but I’m a minimalist and yes have kept with that lifestyle with kids. Your kid should not be getting a gift every other day, that’s weird. If something arrives for mine and it’s something I think we’d keep (we get some from a certain grandparent that I don’t), I have a box in my closet it goes until the next birthday/holiday. And every single time they get new toys (only on birthday or holidays), we get rid of old ones - either donation/trash or another bin in the garage if they’re still nice and could be played with later. Number one is not accumulating stuff and it sounds like you have a problem with that. Also, if you’re having more babies, get an organizing system for clothes. Obviously throw anything out that is old/“play” or you’re over, and put the rest in vacuum sealed bags based on age. Anything temporary -especially large baby toys- I borrow or buy used so I can get rid of it asap after we’re done. It’s really not that hard, but definitely goes against the “normal” American way of having a toy room filled to the ceiling with pieces of toys no one knows what goes to what and hasn’t been played with in months. That would give me a panic attack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I can embrace every other aspects of parenting except for the "stuff." I get done in by sentimentality, not wanting to be wasteful, and seeing the potential in every random thing to become a future arts and craft project or useful in some other way.

This is me exactly. I’m getting better, but man. It’s tough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand this but I’m a minimalist and yes have kept with that lifestyle with kids. Your kid should not be getting a gift every other day, that’s weird. If something arrives for mine and it’s something I think we’d keep (we get some from a certain grandparent that I don’t), I have a box in my closet it goes until the next birthday/holiday. And every single time they get new toys (only on birthday or holidays), we get rid of old ones - either donation/trash or another bin in the garage if they’re still nice and could be played with later. Number one is not accumulating stuff and it sounds like you have a problem with that. Also, if you’re having more babies, get an organizing system for clothes. Obviously throw anything out that is old/“play” or you’re over, and put the rest in vacuum sealed bags based on age. Anything temporary -especially large baby toys- I borrow or buy used so I can get rid of it asap after we’re done. It’s really not that hard, but definitely goes against the “normal” American way of having a toy room filled to the ceiling with pieces of toys no one knows what goes to what and hasn’t been played with in months. That would give me a panic attack.

So people send your kids gifts and you don’t let the kids know about it? What do you say to the gifter? I would not dream of doing that to my parents or in-laws. It brings them so much joy to send the kids things. Of course sometimes “I’m not sure” what happened to those gifts once the kids have played with them for a little while.

We live in the city and certainly do not have a playroom, or room to rotate toys or store a ton of toys to be played with later. But it takes time to organize and with 2 working parents and little kids, time is also in short supply.

[Anonymous]

My kids are grown but I wish I had kept a few special books and favorite toys. When your kids are grown, they may cherish them. When I say few I mean 1-3 not 10-15 books and toys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand this but I’m a minimalist and yes have kept with that lifestyle with kids. Your kid should not be getting a gift every other day, that’s weird. If something arrives for mine and it’s something I think we’d keep (we get some from a certain grandparent that I don’t), I have a box in my closet it goes until the next birthday/holiday. And every single time they get new toys (only on birthday or holidays), we get rid of old ones - either donation/trash or another bin in the garage if they’re still nice and could be played with later. Number one is not accumulating stuff and it sounds like you have a problem with that. Also, if you’re having more babies, get an organizing system for clothes. Obviously throw anything out that is old/“play” or you’re over, and put the rest in vacuum sealed bags based on age. Anything temporary -especially large baby toys- I borrow or buy used so I can get rid of it asap after we’re done. It’s really not that hard, but definitely goes against the “normal” American way of having a toy room filled to the ceiling with pieces of toys no one knows what goes to what and hasn’t been played with in months. That would give me a panic attack.

So people send your kids gifts and you don’t let the kids know about it? What do you say to the gifter? I would not dream of doing that to my parents or in-laws. It brings them so much joy to send the kids things. Of course sometimes “I’m not sure” what happened to those gifts once the kids have played with them for a little while.

We live in the city and certainly do not have a playroom, or room to rotate toys or store a ton of toys to be played with later. But it takes time to organize and with 2 working parents and little kids, time is also in short supply.

If you insist on accepting gifts, you have to make time to deal with them. That means getting rid of old toys as new ones come in. If you can’t, you have to tell them not to send them. But don’t blame the gifts. It’s your responsibility. The less time you have for organizing the more ruthless you have to be about purging, even if you don’t maximize reuse or selling. That’s the way of the world. Time or money.

[Anonymous]

I’m the one who said to be ruthless but I have some crutches. Getting rid of baby clothes makes me emotional. So I have a “purgatory” tote. When I clean out a size, I recycle anything cotton that I can’t hand down to someone right now. Stores and swaps and donations don’t want used onesies. Then I put the nicer things in a tote box with a lid because they make me emotional. The next time we go up a size, I start by going through the tote. It’s usually easier for me to purge donations at that stage. Then I have room in the tote for the next size stuff.

If you’re planning on having more and want to save clothes I think that’s fine but you need some labeled bins somewhere. If space is at a premium just rebuy the onesies and such when the time comes. Only save good pants, sweaters, that kind of thing.

[Anonymous]

Not enough. I actually find it harder as they have gotten older. With little kid stuff I had a lot more control over what came into the house and way less push back when i got rid of stuff. Plus there was just way less stuff.

Now with tweens and elementary kids, there are endless papers, art projects coming home, homework around all the time, crafts always being done (and the supplies) A lot more clothes and shoes in general.

[Anonymous]

^ and all the sports stuff, special shoes for various sports, the equipment, the uniforms, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are grown but I wish I had kept a few special books and favorite toys. When your kids are grown, they may cherish them. When I say few I mean 1-3 not 10-15 books and toys.

They will not cherish them. It's ok for you to keep a few things. But be honest with yourself that you are keeping this stuff FOR YOU. Not for them.

My mom had saved a box of clothes. There were maybe 2 items in the entire box that were still in good shape and cute enough that I put my kid in them. She wore them each for one season. So 35 years of saving stuff in a box may not have been worth that.

I have a small box of things I can't get rid of. But I am pretty honest with myself that this box is FOR ME. I have no expectations my kids will want these items when they are older. Babies and toddlers don't even remember wearing the baby/toddler clothes!

[Anonymous]

Join your neighborhood Buy Nothing group. Then post bags of stuff as you clear out each season.

I get rid of toys, clothes, shoes, furniture, old sheets, random things cluttering my closets. It's great!

[Anonymous]

Oh the 🏆 trophies. What to do with the trophies