Drama Everything

[Anonymous]

Long story short, a few years ago I discovered my DW was having an affair. I confronted her about it, we did counseling and I thought all was fine after that. Fast forward a few years. I discovered last year that she had been having yet another affair with a co-worker - this went on from basically April 2019 - November 2019. Needless to say, I've now told her I am ending our marriage. She needs to seriously work on herself. I've moved out of the house and have my own place. Now, she calls me whenever she has a house problem - the plumbing or whatever. Frankly, I don't give a damn. She can call her former co-worker or whatever other man she was shtupping to fix the house. I am done.

There is a song called Drama Everything by Blue October that aptly describes how I feel when she calls/

Let me start with I've let you go
But you don't get it, though
Politely I've asked you to leave,
But still you follow
It's hard when you're full of heart
When the house you built just falls apart
Well keep the paint fresh, keep the outside clean
Be sure the neighbors see you wear that ring
Don't tell them a thing, they don't know you like me
You're the girl that cries water in the basement
Everybody stop, wait, look, see
You're the girl that could lie to my face
And fabricate a flood to get through to me
I went away and you found a replacement
So call him, don't call me
To the girl that cries water in the basement
You drama everything

I will admit I feel a bit of schadenfreude as she struggles with the house upkeep and feels overwhelmed. But she can always hire a plumber or a handyman. She no longer has a husband and it's her fault.

[Anonymous]

Pretty much. She chose to have an affair, you left and it's on her to figure out the workings of her daily life. It's not really fair to you to endure all the other problems she may or may not have.

[taketothebank]

She can call her former co-worker or whatever other man she was shtupping to fix the house. I am done.

Brother, I am sorry this happened to you. It will get better, just give it time.

You will look back and see that the day you told her goodbye may have been one the hardest, but it was also one of the best.

[Anonymous]

Do you still own the home jointly? Don't cut off your nose to spite your face.

[Anonymous]

If you don't have kids there is no reason for her to have your.personsl number, change it .

All communication is through your lawyer.

She has got some nerve!


Wishing you healing and better future luck in love.

[Anonymous]

Never put your d!ck in crazy.
But quoting lyrics is kinda a jr. high thing. Are you sure you're okay?

[Anonymous]

If you still own the house with her, I would not want to ignore a plumbing issue. Perhaps you could hire a plumber and split the cost? That would only be if you are still listed on the deed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you still own the house with her, I would not want to ignore a plumbing issue. Perhaps you could hire a plumber and split the cost? That would only be if you are still listed on the deed.

NP. Agree. I completely get the anger and desire for her to learn to deal with things for herself instead of treating you like a handyman. But if you and she both own the house and/or you have kids living in it, try to look at the longer term picture here. You want maximum value if you sell the house and split the proceeds eventually so upkeep matters. And if your kids are living there, and will go on living there, well, I'd at least tell her to join one of those online "we'll help you find a plumber/electrician/painter" websites that consolidate names of local businesses.

If you have no kids and the house isn't in your name, well, just tell her Google is her new best friend.

[Anonymous]

What she wants is for me to call the plumber or whatever she needs and then pay for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What she wants is for me to call the plumber or whatever she needs and then pay for it.

Woman here. Her lazy cheating @ss needs to take care of that. She screwed in your bed and now she can lie in it.

She lied and used you and still thinks you will always be there to bail her out. That ship has sailed.

She betrayed and lied and cheated and made a mockery of you and the marriage. Now she can learn to live on her own or get one of the many men she bangs to help her out.

[Anonymous]

For some reason there are a lot of divorced women who just don’t get that they are no longer the responsibility of their former husbands. I am a divorced woman and my XH is the very last person on the planet I would call for anything. And we had an amicable divorce. That’s what friends and YouTube and, in worst case scenarios, professional hired help, is for. But I know a lot of divorced men who still have XW’s try to get them to help them out. Boundaries need to be established. But I’ll never understand the phenomena.

[Anonymous]

Ok, let me help you out here. When she calls, don't answer. When she leaves a message, delete it. You are feeding into the drama and dependency because on some level you enjoy it, but it isn't healthy for you. Find it in yourself to just step away.