What Do You Guys Think About This?

[Anonymous]

I was recently referred to a new NF by a previous family that I had worked for & still have a great relationship with yrs. later.
Both families are long~term friends.

The new NF had said they would be performing a b/g check on me prior to watching their child which I agreed to.
However they ended up needing emergency childcare a few wks. back + I was called in to watch their 18 mos. old child.
I spent about 9 hrs. there overall and both parents went to work outside the home.

On my way out - I had asked the MB what she needed from me to complete the b/g check and she told me that she had changed her mind.
She said since I watched her child that day plus came highly recommended that she would just skip it.

Now two wks. later she has sent me a text asking me for a copy of my DL, SSN and a working email address.
She said that she would be doing a b/g check after all.
While not opposed to being checked (I have had one done w/other families), I am just a little confused as to why she changed her mind.
And also, is the fact that she went back on her word a red flag that her word may not be reliable later on?

The reason I am asking this is because I have had a few bad experiences with NFs prior and just wanted to be selective about picking future families to work for as I do not want to end up in bad situations any longer.

More so since children are involved.

[Anonymous]

She probably just thought better of it and decided to do the check as due diligence. I don't see any red flags here, unless something happened during those 2 weeks - were you still watching the child during that time? Anything out of the ordinary happen?

[Anonymous]

This doesn't seem like a red flag to me either. She probably just changed her mind and decided to go ahead and run the check. We decided not to run a background check on our current nanny because she came highly recommended from a friend of a friend. A couple times right before she started I wondered if I should still do one. I ultimately decided it was unnecessary, but could have easily changed my mind. Even great parents/families are bound to change their minds about all sorts of things related to their children. We're all human and it seems extreme to think something like this could lead to a bad situation. Just my two cents. Good luck OP!

[Anonymous]

I would ask for a background check that she sends you to fill out

No way would I hand someone my SSN and ID that I have only met once

[Anonymous]

She probably said no B/G check in the moment, without checking with her partner and is backtracking. He may be the one who wants it. That's probably all it is. Since it's NBD, I wouldn't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She probably said no B/G check in the moment, without checking with her partner and is backtracking. He may be the one who wants it. That's probably all it is. Since it's NBD, I wouldn't worry about it.

And honestly, you are within your rights to bring it up calmly and politely and ask her why she changed her mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would ask for a background check that she sends you to fill out

No way would I hand someone my SSN and ID that I have only met once

Thx for all the helpful responses!

I had another quick question…..
Don’t families all need to have my SSN in order to process a b/g check?
I only ask because I have had families prior ask me for it & I have always handed it over along w/my DL as photo I.D.

OP.

[Anonymous]

I would not give someone my social security number or my drivers license info even if I had met them once. Something feels sketchy here. Plus the fact that this mom boss would renege on something she previously said definitely is a red flag. It means she is likely flakey and very fickle.

I once had a mom boss who changed her mind a lot. It drove me nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would ask for a background check that she sends you to fill out

No way would I hand someone my SSN and ID that I have only met once

Thx for all the helpful responses!

I had another quick question…..
Don’t families all need to have my SSN in order to process a b/g check?
I only ask because I have had families prior ask me for it & I have always handed it over along w/my DL as photo I.D.

OP.

Yes, a SSN is required to run a background check, but the family can simply email you a background check form to fill out that gets sent directly to the background check company. There's no need for the family to have that information until it's going on your I-9 once they've hired you.

[Anonymous]

Her DH probably insisted on it and she didn't check with him before waiving it initially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her DH probably insisted on it and she didn't check with him before waiving it initially.

I had a similar scenario. Mom and dad weren’t on the same page and dad needed to investigate me more. Due to dad mom is having to start the process over again to look for a nanny. Me personally I would just pass and look for something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was recently referred to a new NF by a previous family that I had worked for & still have a great relationship with yrs. later.
Both families are long~term friends.

The new NF had said they would be performing a b/g check on me prior to watching their child which I agreed to.
However they ended up needing emergency childcare a few wks. back + I was called in to watch their 18 mos. old child.
I spent about 9 hrs. there overall and both parents went to work outside the home.

On my way out - I had asked the MB what she needed from me to complete the b/g check and she told me that she had changed her mind.
She said since I watched her child that day plus came highly recommended that she would just skip it.

Now two wks. later she has sent me a text asking me for a copy of my DL, SSN and a working email address.
She said that she would be doing a b/g check after all.
While not opposed to being checked (I have had one done w/other families), I am just a little confused as to why she changed her mind.
And also, is the fact that she went back on her word a red flag that her word may not be reliable later on?

The reason I am asking this is because I have had a few bad experiences with NFs prior and just wanted to be selective about picking future families to work for as I do not want to end up in bad situations any longer.

More so since children are involved.

She lied to you about this and you can count on her to lie again
I would not work for someone who is a liar. Dodge this bullet.