| married for 18 years. don't really want to celebrate today anymore. is it ok / normal? |
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Married 5 years. We checked in last week that neither of us wanted to buy a present or cards or candy or flowers or anything. But we're going to have a nice steak dinner with a good red wine which is not our typical Monday so we're still "celebrating" somewhat.
As long as you're both fine with it there's not a timeline. |
| Been married 12 years. We had a date night a week ago and decided to call it our Valentine's day celebration. Tonight we'll have heart shaped pizzas with the kids. No gifts or cards. |
| Married 18 years. Yesterday DH brought roses home from his grocery store run. I remembered to order a box of chocolates. We said "Happy Valentines Day! I love you!" and we're good. I think we'll go out to dinner tomorrow night because our kid is off doing something else. That's it. |
| We do a date night the weekend before and exchange cards today- sometimes chocolate is involved. 28 years and counting. |
| We don't. Another superficial day |
| We are having steak and wine too, at home. We never go out or buy stupid shit just because it's valentines day. We prefer to show love/commitment throughout the year by treating each other with respect, spending time together, etc. |
| Everyone is different. Some married couples stop, some continue, some flaunt and inflate their love and celebrations on social media. One couple from my social circle was shouting about their love on valentine's day but filed for divorce next month so you never know. Just do what works but a little surprise can be good for the relationship. |
| Around year 5 for us. After that we just had a nice dinner at home with some chocolates or special dessert. |
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I think what matters more is how your partner feels. If they're over it, be over it together. If they want the flowers and chocolates though it's really a low effort thing and I say just do it.
I personally don't care about Valentine's Day for me, but it's my husband's birthday so of course I always have some presents and a cake for him. |
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Definitely different for everyone, but I will say that I wish the answer was 10 years! This is our 14th valentines after being married and I really wish we could just be done with it. I feel like Christmas, birthdays, and anniversaries are enough. DH feels a lot of pressure to make Valentines special for me, and I see it stresses him out a bit. But I don't care! It is now a kids' holiday to me. I like heart-shaped cookies and hand-made valentines and sweet notes to friends and all that with them.
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No timeline is accurate. Going on 23 years this year. Some years we do more, some less. This year, DH sent me flowers at work (which I've sometimes nixed in advance depending on the year / expense) and we have cards. Bought mine last night. Picking up take out on the way home for us and our teen daughter.
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| Married 22 years. Traded cards and candy. Will have a special dinner. |
Life is made of a bunch of mundane and superficial days all strung together. DH got us reservations for an overpriced prix fixe menu downtown. I did my hair and makeup and put on a dress so we can swing straight in after work while the au pair is still on duty. We will probably chat about how lucky we are to have wonderful children and each other. |
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Never? Because we've always done very low-key celebrations, therefore they are sustainable and what we're comfortable with. Today we're eating a special home-made dessert. |