| Currently beginning the egg freezing process and my Dr. had me come off birth control to do the initial diagnostics. Obviously, I’m ready to get this process over with, but it could be several months. I’m still single and dating (looking to build a family obviously). I keep hearing that third date means sex, etc., but I’m not sure how to handle it with new dates. I’m going to ask my doctor about it next time I’m in the office, but I’m not sure how I should handle intimacy in the meantime. Anyone been through this and have advice? |
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It could be several months, or it could be 4-6 weeks. You may only need one round, depending on how your body responds to the drugs and how your "harvest" goes.
How to handle intimacy in the meantime? Go by your doctor's advice rather than what "everyone says" about 3rd dates, and know that your body and your feelings may also naturally tell you to pause on sex when you're ripening 10-50 follicles at once as opposed to one. I was seeing a guy (no set yet) when I did my injections. I got to know him, and found I had other reasons for not getting naked in front of him than the fact that my belly was a bloated pincushion. Now I'm on the other side and in the position of having frozen eggs and being over 35 on dating apps. I don't put it in my profile. I'm figuring out how to address it in person. Good luck! I hope the process goes smoothly for you. I'm so, so glad I did it. |
over 35 PP from above with more thoughts -- once you start your injections and monitoring appointments, your priorities will likely shift toward optimizing the process over dating. And just reality -- depending on your protocol, you're looking at two weeks of twice-daily injections, near-daily transvaginal ultrasounds, and a biohazard sharps container in your bathroom. This is not conducive to romance and you will likely not be at your horniest.
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| Oh good god. I have done tons of online dating and third dates does not mea sex unless you really want it to. I never have sex that early. |
| Condoms?!?! |
Lol, +1 to this. As another poster pointed out, you’ll probably want to take a break from dating during the retrieval process. I went through IVF. The retrieval process itself is fairly short- daily injections in the morning and at night for about 6 days, then a trigger shot and 36 hours later was retrieval. But with specific times for the shots and frequent in office ultrasounds and bloodwork, your mind is going to be elsewhere during that short window. When you resume dating, just use condoms until your bc is effective again. Not to mention condoms protect against stds, so there’s that… |
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Good lord. Do NOT have sex while you’re doing IVF. You will end up pregnant with 15 babies by some guy who you’ve only known for 3 dates.
And PPs are right that you won’t want to have sex during IVF anyway (or egg freezing, which is basically IVF). You are going to be busy with carefully-time shots, daily medical appointments, bloated. It’s not a super fun time. |
| I didn’t have sex during the egg freezing process. I cant remember now but I think they tell you when not to. I did two rounds. I ended up getting pregant and having a baby at 40 and didn’t need them. Good luck! |
Honestly unless you’re getting sti screenings at date number two this should be a no brainer if you’re having sex at date number three. STIs can ruin your fertility faster than aging. And the kind of garbage that believe that third dates automatically mean sex are probably not the father you want for these babies anyway
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This^. |
| DW got pregnant at 44… |
You don’t owe anyone sex on a third date. |
Don't think of yourself as "old." Age is but a number! |
Good lord! Get a self esteem workbook and only have sex if YOU want to and/or you aren’t at risk of getting pregnant with triplets if there’s a birth control mishap! Sex on third date as a requirement is propagated by gross incel-ish divorced eff-wits and men who think like that aren’t marriage material. (Not that there is anything wrong w third date sex! It’s just not a requirement for normal adults who are suitable mates.) |
+ a million! |