Talk to me about geriatric care managers

[Anonymous]

Got my mom to agree (sort of)we can hire one to help with my dad.
Got some names of managers.
Advice? Things to look out for?
What should I expect? What can I hope?
Thanks

[Anonymous]

A good one can have a special way of talking to the senior to be able to get them to try things you can't get them to do. Some can also can quickly set up things like PT, OT, in-home doctor consult, nursing-aide. However, beware, some are on the age-in-place gravy train and it's the rare senior who doesn't want to age in place. They will sell the moon about how they only contract with the best services and "no-shows" aren't an issue and yada yada. What age in place turned into for us is the following:

*A very lonely parent who was verbally abusive to us and wanted us to be her social life. She needed to be around peers for the social experience and to behave.

*Plenty of no shows, plenty of emergency calls to us and a case manager who didn't care because she already accessed the gravy train and got consent when senior could give it. Health POA was given to a sibling who didn't live in the area and wanted to follow mom's wishes.

*Stealing by staff and otherwise trying to take advantage of mom.

We had to make a serious play that we were moving out of the area and would no longer be the family that lives closest for sibling to do the right thing and place mom in in residential which was a world better. We actually hired a new case manager who works well with assisted living facilities to make sure mom was getting good care and to assess when she needed her own aide and help with medication management discussions when mom became nasty.

So....all this is to say, yes, case managers can be good, but they can also be a bit predatorial in playing into unrealistic ideas by a senior.

[Anonymous]

The one we have is a godsend. She helped us talk to our mom about moving to an AL facility and was not especially invested in in-home care. She is my mom’s advocate there (and drives them a little batty, tbh, but allows me to be the good cop.) I don’t agree with ever recommendation and she sometimes oversteps, but she is worth every penny. I can live my life without problem solving for my mother every single day.

[Anonymous]

What do they cost?

[Anonymous]

Yes, curious about the cost. Is a geriatric care manager a person who could look at a person’s finances and determine a strategy for their ongoing living and care? Would they be able to help determine how to include Medicaid into the equation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, curious about the cost. Is a geriatric care manager a person who could look at a person’s finances and determine a strategy for their ongoing living and care? Would they be able to help determine how to include Medicaid into the equation?

They aren’t cheap. Their capabilities vary. If you want Medicaid advice consult an expert, preferably associated with the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys (NAELA).

[Anonymous]

If you are in Montgomery County, call the Montgmery County Department of Aging and ask for names/recommendations.

[Anonymous]

I couldn’t get my parents to accept this. My mother felt like the care manager was “trying to take over.” They met with the manager at my insistence but simply refused to engage her. I think it’s hard for a long married couple to have another person in their business like this. I think it would’ve been better for a single parent.
The manager I found was absolutely not cheap but she seemed totally capable and familiar with all the local resources/doctors where my parents were, plus very responsive. I really, really wanted her to have a pair of eyes and hands there to help but it was no go…

[Anonymous]

We used a care manager for the last two years that my mom was able to live independently. I lived 4 hours from my mom and my brother was an hour away, so we needed someone local to check in on her regularly and provide assistance. They were a great help with picking up medications, stocking the pill dispenser, giving rides to appointments, communicating with the management of my mom's senior apartment building, and just general support. They were our eyes and ears and reported their observations to us regularly. The Aging Life Care Association's website is a good source of information for what care managers do and how to find an accredited one in your area. https://www.aginglifecare.org/

It's certainly not cheap - our care manager charged $150 per hour. The peace of mind was worth it to us. Our care manager was also a big help in planning for my mom's eventual move from independent living to our house in Virginia, and then to assisted living/memory care, where she is now.

[Anonymous]

I used GeriatriCare for placement in a facility, and was very pleased. A few years later, they would no longer help me out with issues that had arisen, and I don’t know what the problem was, but it was a help to get placed.