Should A Newborn Be On-Demand Or On A Schedule?

[Anonymous]

My newborn is all over the place with feeding and sleeping. He’s a very good baby but some days he will eat every two hours and take smaller naps, and other days he will take a long naps and eat every 3-4 hours. Some days he will eat every two hours and then take a 4 hour nap. Some days he will cluster feed for hours in the evening. He doesn’t have a predictable schedule and every day is different. The only thing predictable is his wake window. I’ve been told by family and friends and some books that I’m reading that you need to “schedule” a baby so they learn to eat their calories during the day and to sleep longer at night. Some have said I’m letting him sleep too long during the day and that he should never go more than 3 hours between feeds or let him nap longer than two hours at a time. I’ve been told I’m setting myself up for having a baby who is up all night and doesn’t know when is day or night. I’ve been told this by my best friend with 3 kids who babysat him for 5 hours and both my mom and MIL who visit often. I don’t know what is normal or right. I’ve read about the fourth trimester and on-demand, and about putting your baby on a predictable routine. What is normal for a newborn?

[Anonymous]

On demand. They are wll over the place. I would not let them sleep for linger than 3 hrs at a time during tbe day though. Has he regained his birth weight?

[Anonymous]

I am not the most experienced mother being the mother of an only child. But for a newborn, I would say -- on demand for everything and anything.

[Anonymous]

Oh and the predictable routine is the babys routine not yours. Start watching for babys cues of hungry and tired and follow those. Not a clock. Some babies last 20 min between end of feed and sleep. Some 15, some longer.

[Anonymous]

How old is your baby?

[Anonymous]

On demand. Newborns are all over the place as they are changing and growing so fast. Hang in there. Your baby will settle into a routine naturally.

[Anonymous]

On demand.

[Anonymous]

On demand, but what works for your child is best.

[Anonymous]

How old?

[Anonymous]

On demand.

[Anonymous]

He literally just arrived after a very traumatic trip and lousy welcome that involved being transported from this warm dark place to this brightly lit table where people rubbed him and talked at him. Give the kid a minute to adapt before you have him on the clock.

[Anonymous]

On demand. This naturally leads to a schedule but the baby sets it. That way is better because if you try to impose a schedule and it doesn’t work for the baby, no one is happy. Follow baby’s lead.

[Anonymous]

Personal preference. If on demand is working for you, keep doing and tell people you’re not in the market for advice. Personally, I’m a schedule person for the reasons listed - my babies have been on schedules since they were 2 weeks old.

There’s no “should” here. What makes sense for you and how you want to parent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He literally just arrived after a very traumatic trip and lousy welcome that involved being transported from this warm dark place to this brightly lit table where people rubbed him and talked at him. Give the kid a minute to adapt before you have him on the clock.

Amen.

[Anonymous]

Schedule. Everyone will be happier.

Been there, done that.