To refer or not to refer

[Anonymous]

I’m trying to decide whether to parent refer or if there isn’t a good chance of getting in. DS is reading at a DRA 30 but only got a 129 on the NNAT. I didn’t get the feeling that his teacher was enthusiastic about him being in AAP but I’m not sure I was understanding her well.

DH says it’ll be stressful on DS to see me looking for work samples, etc. and thinks our chances are slim. DS isn’t a wiz kid but he is very thoughtful - especially about how to help others. On the other hand, being thoughtful does make him sensitive and possibly hurt if he doesn’t get in.

Any thoughts or advice?

[Anonymous]

Whether you think he will be found eligible shouldn’t drive your decision. It’s about whether you think he requires these services. If so, then you refer.

[Anonymous]

If you think your son might get hurt if he doesn’t get in, don’t tell him that you referred him.
If you think he will benefit from fast paced curriculum then you should refer.

[Anonymous]

129 is pretty good and the CogAT score is often higher than NNAT. You don’t really have to let your DS know if you refer him or not. My kids didn’t know about AAP at all really until 3rd grade started.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you all for the advice.

As dad as keeping the submission secret, I was thinking about submitting an experiment DS did this summer and wanted DS to explain why he decided to do what he did. I think it will mean more coming from him, right? I might add a little explanation, depending on how clear DS is.

Part of me is really hoping DS will get in because his one friend is moving away at the end of the year. A fresh start might be helpful.

Thanks, everyone, for the advice!

[Anonymous]

Refer him. My son also had a 129 on the NNAT and his teacher wasn’t enthusiastic about the referral. Does your school happen to not have a LLIV program or center? If not, that’s your answer why right there. For the record, my son has passed advanced on every SOL since and qualified for Algebra I as a 7th grader. His grades have also been excellent. You have nothing to lose by referring.

[Anonymous]

Refer and don’t use that experiment. Use another sample.

[Anonymous]

NNAT is the least reliable of the tests. My DS had 129 on NNAT but scored 137-139 on all sub categories of the CoGat. He was also 99th percentile on WISC (part of neuropsych). Go ahead and Parent refer and see what happens. It can’t hurt to submit the referral but I wouldn’t tell DS you’re doing it. My son knew nothing about the process until we told him he was in the program. Actually, he still knows nothing about the process that got him into AAP.

[Anonymous]

+1 for refer. Just don't put your son in the loop about it. Or you can ask him about the experiment just saying you want to document it for your records. (Which you likely do, you just also want it for something else).

[Anonymous]

Refer and do not tell your child. I wish more people did it that way. Make up a reason to get him to explain something if you have to even - you want to tell a friend about it or a relative or something.

[Anonymous]

No need to tell your child. No need to collect work samples. Just refer and let the school prepare the packet. Keep it low stress on everyone.

[Anonymous]

Always refer. Not referring is the same as pre-rejecting your kid. If you refer, your kid might get in. If you don't, your kid 100% won't.

Also, at many schools, the kids who were referred but got rejected are the first ones they consider for principal placement, level III, and advanced math.

It's also possible that you won't be able to avoid hurt feelings if your kid doesn't get in. Kids at school will probably talk about AAP and who got in.