DH's ExGF Prowling Around

[Anonymous]

We were at Target weekend before last when we bumped into DH's ex. She was ecstatic to see him, cold to me. Entire interation last all of 5 minutes.

DH tells me she called him two days later to see how he had been since they parted ways 15 years ago (umm, wife and two daughters). Seems her marriage failed.

Since that call she has called him two more times (he didnt take either) and he spotted her driving near his office. Maybe a coincidence but it doesnt feel right.

Ignore her? Confront her?

FWIW he would never cheat. We are married 12 years and very in love.

[Anonymous]

Put a tracker on his car. This doesn't usually go well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Put a tracker on his car. This doesn't usually go well.

Ugh, these nasty-minded posters like this PP come out of the woodwork the second they see a post like yours, OP. Isn't it lovely, how they leap instantly to assuming every single man on the planet is going to cheat the second some woman so much as looks at him? Good lord, putting a tracker on his car would be ridiculous.

She's called and he hasn't picked up. And he told you about it. She's been seen near his office and he told you about that. The telling you is good. Ask him to keep telling you if she gets in touch again. If you go all suspicious and ballistic he will stop telling you and that's not good, but if you treat it as "this b#*ch is crazy and laughable" he will keep being open. Sounds like possibly he's freaked out a bit by her sudden and very aggressive attention. Three calls in, what two weeks? Yeah, aggressive in this situation. Make her a joke between you. I'd wager she is going to stop this nonsense soon since he's not even taking her calls.

He should just block her number and that solves the calling problem. He can't help where she drives around. If he's concerned she'll turn up and try to see him AT his office, he can let the reception desk, if there is one, know not to send anyone back to his office/desk without first phoning from reception.

Update us. I still think she's going to fade away.

[Anonymous]

I'd be out and about together more often having an amazing time and enjoying life. Maybe she will be watching, maybe not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be out and about together more often having an amazing time and enjoying life. Maybe she will be watching, maybe not.

Yes, to this. Post a few cute selfies of you two on date night. Do not contact her and give her the satisfaction of now being a triangulated character in her imaginary romance.

[Anonymous]

Ignore her. Your husband isn’t responding to her. The less oxygen she gets, the faster she will fade away.

[Anonymous]

Not really seeing how a wife and two daughters equates to how he has been.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Put a tracker on his car. This doesn't usually go well.

Ugh, these nasty-minded posters like this PP come out of the woodwork the second they see a post like yours, OP. Isn't it lovely, how they leap instantly to assuming every single man on the planet is going to cheat the second some woman so much as looks at him? Good lord, putting a tracker on his car would be ridiculous.

She's called and he hasn't picked up. And he told you about it. She's been seen near his office and he told you about that. The telling you is good. Ask him to keep telling you if she gets in touch again. If you go all suspicious and ballistic he will stop telling you and that's not good, but if you treat it as "this b#*ch is crazy and laughable" he will keep being open. Sounds like possibly he's freaked out a bit by her sudden and very aggressive attention. Three calls in, what two weeks? Yeah, aggressive in this situation. Make her a joke between you. I'd wager she is going to stop this nonsense soon since he's not even taking her calls.

He should just block her number and that solves the calling problem. He can't help where she drives around. If he's concerned she'll turn up and try to see him AT his office, he can let the reception desk, if there is one, know not to send anyone back to his office/desk without first phoning from reception.

Update us. I still think she's going to fade away.

+1

The idea about being super extra lovey-dovey on social media doesn’t seem so great to me. It would come across as insecure, and if the whole point of posting more “happy couple” photos is to send her a message, I’m not sure that’s the message you want to send.

[Anonymous]

She just has boundary issues and is treating him like he’s single. He needs to shut that down embarrass her and make her move on.

[Anonymous]

He needs to send her a strongly worded text to stop calling that he sees it as harassment and he has no interest in talking to her this could escalate if she’s unstable been there done that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not really seeing how a wife and two daughters equates to how he has been.

Single and childless I presume.

[Anonymous]

I don't believe she just happened to run into him. I also don't believe that he's not giving her some kind of signal.

And he'd never cheat are famous last words.

[Anonymous]

Make sure she’s not following her and vice versa on any social media platforms, or you!

This woman is veering on stalker territory.

Watch this one closely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make sure she’s not following her and vice versa on any social media platforms, or you!

This woman is veering on stalker territory.

Watch this one closely.

^ following him or you; and neither of you are following her.

The more she sees your happy life, the more she will want to have it and try to replace you.

These old HS unhappy midlifers are the worst.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Put a tracker on his car. This doesn't usually go well.

Ugh, these nasty-minded posters like this PP come out of the woodwork the second they see a post like yours, OP. Isn't it lovely, how they leap instantly to assuming every single man on the planet is going to cheat the second some woman so much as looks at him? Good lord, putting a tracker on his car would be ridiculous.

She's called and he hasn't picked up. And he told you about it. She's been seen near his office and he told you about that. The telling you is good. Ask him to keep telling you if she gets in touch again. If you go all suspicious and ballistic he will stop telling you and that's not good, but if you treat it as "this b#*ch is crazy and laughable" he will keep being open. Sounds like possibly he's freaked out a bit by her sudden and very aggressive attention. Three calls in, what two weeks? Yeah, aggressive in this situation. Make her a joke between you. I'd wager she is going to stop this nonsense soon since he's not even taking her calls.

He should just block her number and that solves the calling problem. He can't help where she drives around. If he's concerned she'll turn up and try to see him AT his office, he can let the reception desk, if there is one, know not to send anyone back to his office/desk without first phoning from reception.

Update us. I still think she's going to fade away.

+1

The idea about being super extra lovey-dovey on social media doesn’t seem so great to me. It would come across as insecure, and if the whole point of posting more “happy couple” photos is to send her a message, I’m not sure that’s the message you want to send.

Yep. That’s what attracted the OW to my ex. She wanted my life. She even said as much, that she was jealous of me.

What they don’t realize is that that aren’t you. The big social circle is your friends. The family is your family. Even if the guy remotely wanted to be with her it would be a very different life and after 12, 20 years these people aren’t going to embrace her.