Help w/terrible mornings - 3yo
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| DS is 3 and we are dealing with many challenging behaviors (nothing out of the ordinary) but the worst by far is getting through our morning routine. He has the same routine everyday so it's predictable for him, but it all falls apart when we have to get dressed for school. We give him lots of prompting for each part of the routine, and give him the option to choose his own outfit. No matter what we try, he starts screaming, squirms away, says he hates school (he doesn't), etc. Every day starts out so stressfully. Any suggestions for anyone who has BTDT? A routine sticker chart? Song/video to play while he gets dressed? I know I'm probably missing something obvious but I'm at a loss. |
Anonymous
| Super simple songs has a song & video about getting dressed. Are the clothes for him comfy play clothes? |
Anonymous
| Do you pick the clothes the night before? If not you should do that and let him have input. Then he needs to get dressed before he leaves his bedroom. I would do some kind of reward chart for being ready by a certain time. |
Anonymous
Yes, all of his clothes are super comfy and easy to move in bc he's very active |
Anonymous
|
We do bathroom, teeth and dressed before we even go downstairs. Then its breakfast and leave. I know some parents let their kids sleep in their school clothes, which is an option.
You can have him choose clothes the night before/Sunday night and get a system that hangs it up so its visible. https://www.amazon.com/Lilithye-Hanging-Organizer-Clothing-Foldable/dp/B09GK314Q6/ref=sr_1_18?dchild=1&keywords=kids+hanging+clothes+organizer&qid=1635772304&sr=8-18 You can also get a routine chart to help him visualize the steps https://www.amazon.com/Visual-Schedule-Planner-Create-Aids/dp/B093ZC33TT/ref=sr_1_15?dchild=1&keywords=morning+routine+chart+for+kids&qid=1635772388&sprefix=morning+rout%2Caps%2C57&sr=8-15 Simplify. Visualize. We struggled with this too and had to implement the above. The whole morning would go great until brushing teeth- even if we did it downstairs! So we moved it to first thing and its done. Figure out what works for him. If its the last thing before leaving it may not work. |
Anonymous
|
Ok this isn't what you want to hear, but the thing that helped our morning routine was....turning 4.
3 year olds are hard! They are smart enough to know that this routine is the thing that leads up to what they don't want: parent separation. But they are NOT smart enough to realize that it will be done either way, but one way can be calm and one can be stressful. The only thing that helped my youngest was that the pandemic hit while he was 3 and we stopped leaving the house. So who cares what you're wearing! Nothing else worked. Choosing for him, sleeping in his clothes, laying them out the night before, forcing him, being as patient as possible, allowing him an hour to get dressed, bribing, routines, etc. NONE WORKED. We just had to push through and it sucked and there was lots of crying from him (and sometimes from me). |
Anonymous
|
Routine/checklist helped some. Talking about the routine and practicing in a fun way on the weekend - doing a pretend get ready using the chart was helpful.
I didn't end up trying it, but if you get really desperate you can try having him sleep in his clothes for the morning. Won't solve everything, but one less battle in the morning. |
Anonymous
|
A activity/reward chart always seemed to help mine. But make sure picking out cloth is designated for the night before not the morning of.
The morning routine reward (a sticker or a snack) is given right after he gets in the car. If you wait to long, the satisfaction of following through the morning routine may be too delayed to the point he doesn’t remember or care. Lots of praises and fun music(sing along) in the car after a smooth morning out the door. |
Anonymous
| EArlier bedtime? |
Anonymous
Choosing an outfit was too much for my kids when they were three. They were overwhelmed even when it was just two choices and melted down. We did so much better when I just handed them clothes. |
Anonymous
OP here - I appreciate all of the suggestion on here but thanks for this especially. I'm starting to realize that with a lot of 3 yo craziness I just have to accept surviving and not thriving. Today's episode ended in both me and him in tears so knowing that others have been there is helpful. |
Anonymous
| I still pick out my just turned 3 year olds outfit, and she must be dressed before she leaves her bedroom in the morning. I do allow her to choose what pair of shoes she wears- this happens downstairs right before we head out the door. Right now, this seems to be the right amount of choice for her. |
Anonymous
|
I cheerfully took my kid to school in PJs one day not wanting to have this battle, and he was embarrassed and changed in the car. He never didn't get ready again.
This is very kid dependent though. I had a hunch it would work w/ mine but it could have backfired as well. |
Anonymous
| It may not be the routine but the manner in which you are pushing through it - ie if you are rushing the kid or expecting them to do things on cue that’s not realistic |
Anonymous
| A check off chart and time to play before preschool really helped my 3 yr old. Same routine everyday but the promise of a good half hour of play really made the difference. And no rushing. |