You need to have your kids read outside of school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am overloaded as a parent as are many of you. I saw a stat that most Americans read at below an 8th grade level- many are at a 6th grade level or lower. I then panicked when I found out late to the game that MCPS has been a complete shit show for reading, including not using instructional materials based on the science of reading and having students read below grade level texts.

I started mandating reading at home, because I was worried that my kids would not progress beyond 8th grade- despite having both parents who went to grad school.

No more graphic novels at home and reading at least 2 hours a week of grade level or higher texts. In a few months, DS had read more books at home then for all of middle school.

It's sad that mcps cannot be trusted to do the basics but here we are.

Newsflash. Students reading outside of school is a different issue than the problems within schools. The great majority of high achievers read or do math outside of school. You should have been reading to your kids and requiring them to read at home before kindergarten! This is a parenting issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to give a piece of advice about raising readers based on my experience:

You need to read to your kids way more, and way longer, than most people do. You also need to start reading them novel length books earlier.

Most MC and UMC parents read to their kids nightly until school age. But they mostly read picture books, and the tendency is to stop reading on e kids can read a picture book themselves, around K. They might still "read together" but the focus will be on encouraging the child to read to them. I actually think pushing kids to read aloud to parents is when many kids stop enjoying books, because reading aloud is much harder than just reading, and especially for a new reader, it can feel like a chore.

Instead, I would encourage parents to continue to read to their kids, and to start reading chapter books as soon as their kid can tolerate it (choose extremely engaging books so that the lack of pictures will bother them less, and the excitement will sustain interest over multiple nights as you read).

And then keep reading. If you read good, engaging novels to kids, they will develop an interest in reading no matter what. Yes you also separately have to support reading skills. If they aren't getting proper phonics instruction in school, do a program like Hooked on Phonics at home. They need 10-15 minutes a day, minimum, of phonics instruction until it clicks. But that's different from reading for pleasure, and if you want your kids to read independently for pleasure, you have to read to them in a way that shows them how mature, more advanced books can be pleasurable.

I would read TO your kids as long as possible, all the way through elementary ideally. Even after you stop reading to them, I'd suggest keeping up the habit of reading together, and spending 20-30 minutes each evening as a family reading in the same room, even if you are all reading different books. No screens except a e-book reader.

This is what it takes.

Sorry doesn't ring true to me. My parents never ever read to me and I devoured books as a kid. Read everything I could get my hands on. I didn't want to be read at or to, I read myself. You can't force kids to love reading. They either do or they don't.

I'm the PP and I was like you -- loved to read even though my parents never read to me, was an advanced reader in elementary.

But I went to school in a school system that assigned a lot of novels, forced me to read and think about classic (and challenging) books, and had high expectations for my reading and writing ability. Our kids are not in that environment. Plus they have the distraction of handheld screens everywhere, especially at school.

I also disagree that kids either love reading or don't. Would you say the same about music or movies? Some people just can't watch movies, that's how it is? I think as long as kids can find a way to experience the pure pleasure of reading a really engaging story, they will love it. The problem is that many kids lag behind in reading ability or have learning disorders to overcome, and this makes reading arduous and unpleasant. By the time they are proficient in reading, they have negative associations with reading and don't seek out engaging texts (or resort to graphic novels because they are easier to read) and therefore never "level up" in the kinds of books they read, and just don't experience the pleasure of reading challenging but very engaging literature.

If parents keep reading to kids through elementary, you can fix all these problems. You can provide your kids with the classic and challenging literature that MCPS will not. You can show them what it feels like to read a longer novel start to finish, and the pleasures associated with this task. You can give them a break from their own reading challenges that can make reading feel like a chore, while still building their vocabulary, experiencing advanced story structure, etc.

If people really don't have the time for 30 minutes of reading a night with kids, you could maybe approximate this with audio books. But I think it's better if parents read with kids because I've found that this makes it easier to ensure kids are following the story, to stop and answer questions about what words mean or what is happening, and to ensure the reading material is age appropriate and not too scary or boring.

I have 3 kids. Read to all of them. One loves to read, one hates it, and one prefers to build intricate Lego structures and stages battle scenes and draws a lot. They are who they are. They are all great readers but they don't all love to read or do it for fun.

How old are they?

What difference does it make? They are late elem school and high school. Not 6 yr olds.

The whole point is reading to them well past when they are 6 years old, so that's why. The implication is that if you'd continued reading to them throughout elementary instead of deciding "oh well some kids just don't like books" then all of your kids would be independent readers instead of just the one who happened to like it without you supporting it much.

Lots of skills are like this. You can let your kids self-select into sports or playing instruments, but some families will find a way to encourage such that all their kids ultimately do it. That's why you see families where all the kids are HS athletes or they are all proficient at piano and violin. It's not an accident -- their parents cultivated that interest instead of just waiting to see which kids naturally gravitated towards those activities.

Well reading is similar. Sure, some kids will like reading no matter what. But you can turn just about any kid into a reader with the right support, just like just about any kid can become proficient at dance or soccer or music if you really prioritize it and find ways to get your kids engaged and willing to do it. And parents also doing these activities will make it much more likely kids will do them too, I've noticed.

I could read to one of my kids all day until I was blue in the face. They would never become a big reader. Just because you can force piano playing until proficiency, it doesn't mean you have a kid who loves playing the piano. Incidentally the kid who doesn't read for fun reads quite well, many grades above level, but alas, does not love it. Why does a kid have to love it to be good at it? They aren't the same. I'm good at a lot of things I don't love to do. So I disagree with the premise that by brute force your kid will have no choice but to love the things their parents have prioritized for them. Ask kids who are now adults how they feel about that sort of parenting.

In my experience, proficiency breeds enjoyment. Sure, there may be some people who are good at things and don't enjoy them, but it's not something I see often. A kid who loves reading is generally going to be better at, and I also think from a practical standpoint, if your goal is to enable your kid to be able to read longer, denser, and more complicated texts as they proceed into higher education, I think it's going to be hard for them to get to that point unless they read a lot. It would be like expecting a kid to do higher level math without ever doing any math except what was assigned in school. I guess it's possible, but it's really unlikely.

I also don't think this is about "forcing" anything. I think the idea is to find a way to make it pleasurable. I think when parents prioritize certain activities, they are highly motivated to find ways for their kids to want to do them. Maybe it's finding the right teacher (or in the case of reading, the right books), offering rewards, allowing a lot of freedom in how they engage in practice, you name it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to give a piece of advice about raising readers based on my experience:

You need to read to your kids way more, and way longer, than most people do. You also need to start reading them novel length books earlier.

Most MC and UMC parents read to their kids nightly until school age. But they mostly read picture books, and the tendency is to stop reading on e kids can read a picture book themselves, around K. They might still "read together" but the focus will be on encouraging the child to read to them. I actually think pushing kids to read aloud to parents is when many kids stop enjoying books, because reading aloud is much harder than just reading, and especially for a new reader, it can feel like a chore.

Instead, I would encourage parents to continue to read to their kids, and to start reading chapter books as soon as their kid can tolerate it (choose extremely engaging books so that the lack of pictures will bother them less, and the excitement will sustain interest over multiple nights as you read).

And then keep reading. If you read good, engaging novels to kids, they will develop an interest in reading no matter what. Yes you also separately have to support reading skills. If they aren't getting proper phonics instruction in school, do a program like Hooked on Phonics at home. They need 10-15 minutes a day, minimum, of phonics instruction until it clicks. But that's different from reading for pleasure, and if you want your kids to read independently for pleasure, you have to read to them in a way that shows them how mature, more advanced books can be pleasurable.

I would read TO your kids as long as possible, all the way through elementary ideally. Even after you stop reading to them, I'd suggest keeping up the habit of reading together, and spending 20-30 minutes each evening as a family reading in the same room, even if you are all reading different books. No screens except a e-book reader.

This is what it takes.

Sorry doesn't ring true to me. My parents never ever read to me and I devoured books as a kid. Read everything I could get my hands on. I didn't want to be read at or to, I read myself. You can't force kids to love reading. They either do or they don't.

I'm the PP and I was like you -- loved to read even though my parents never read to me, was an advanced reader in elementary.

But I went to school in a school system that assigned a lot of novels, forced me to read and think about classic (and challenging) books, and had high expectations for my reading and writing ability. Our kids are not in that environment. Plus they have the distraction of handheld screens everywhere, especially at school.

I also disagree that kids either love reading or don't. Would you say the same about music or movies? Some people just can't watch movies, that's how it is? I think as long as kids can find a way to experience the pure pleasure of reading a really engaging story, they will love it. The problem is that many kids lag behind in reading ability or have learning disorders to overcome, and this makes reading arduous and unpleasant. By the time they are proficient in reading, they have negative associations with reading and don't seek out engaging texts (or resort to graphic novels because they are easier to read) and therefore never "level up" in the kinds of books they read, and just don't experience the pleasure of reading challenging but very engaging literature.

If parents keep reading to kids through elementary, you can fix all these problems. You can provide your kids with the classic and challenging literature that MCPS will not. You can show them what it feels like to read a longer novel start to finish, and the pleasures associated with this task. You can give them a break from their own reading challenges that can make reading feel like a chore, while still building their vocabulary, experiencing advanced story structure, etc.

If people really don't have the time for 30 minutes of reading a night with kids, you could maybe approximate this with audio books. But I think it's better if parents read with kids because I've found that this makes it easier to ensure kids are following the story, to stop and answer questions about what words mean or what is happening, and to ensure the reading material is age appropriate and not too scary or boring.

I have 3 kids. Read to all of them. One loves to read, one hates it, and one prefers to build intricate Lego structures and stages battle scenes and draws a lot. They are who they are. They are all great readers but they don't all love to read or do it for fun.

How old are they?

What difference does it make? They are late elem school and high school. Not 6 yr olds.

The whole point is reading to them well past when they are 6 years old, so that's why. The implication is that if you'd continued reading to them throughout elementary instead of deciding "oh well some kids just don't like books" then all of your kids would be independent readers instead of just the one who happened to like it without you supporting it much.

Lots of skills are like this. You can let your kids self-select into sports or playing instruments, but some families will find a way to encourage such that all their kids ultimately do it. That's why you see families where all the kids are HS athletes or they are all proficient at piano and violin. It's not an accident -- their parents cultivated that interest instead of just waiting to see which kids naturally gravitated towards those activities.

Well reading is similar. Sure, some kids will like reading no matter what. But you can turn just about any kid into a reader with the right support, just like just about any kid can become proficient at dance or soccer or music if you really prioritize it and find ways to get your kids engaged and willing to do it. And parents also doing these activities will make it much more likely kids will do them too, I've noticed.

I could read to one of my kids all day until I was blue in the face. They would never become a big reader. Just because you can force piano playing until proficiency, it doesn't mean you have a kid who loves playing the piano. Incidentally the kid who doesn't read for fun reads quite well, many grades above level, but alas, does not love it. Why does a kid have to love it to be good at it? They aren't the same. I'm good at a lot of things I don't love to do. So I disagree with the premise that by brute force your kid will have no choice but to love the things their parents have prioritized for them. Ask kids who are now adults how they feel about that sort of parenting.

In my experience, proficiency breeds enjoyment. Sure, there may be some people who are good at things and don't enjoy them, but it's not something I see often. A kid who loves reading is generally going to be better at, and I also think from a practical standpoint, if your goal is to enable your kid to be able to read longer, denser, and more complicated texts as they proceed into higher education, I think it's going to be hard for them to get to that point unless they read a lot. It would be like expecting a kid to do higher level math without ever doing any math except what was assigned in school. I guess it's possible, but it's really unlikely.

I also don't think this is about "forcing" anything. I think the idea is to find a way to make it pleasurable. I think when parents prioritize certain activities, they are highly motivated to find ways for their kids to want to do them. Maybe it's finding the right teacher (or in the case of reading, the right books), offering rewards, allowing a lot of freedom in how they engage in practice, you name it.

Well, that's your experience. My DH was pushed pretty hard by his parents growing up and was very successful academically, but he probably picks up a book for pleasure reading twice a year. It's just not his thing. I guess maybe my MIL didn't offer enough rewards for him in childhood to foster a love for reading, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to give a piece of advice about raising readers based on my experience:

You need to read to your kids way more, and way longer, than most people do. You also need to start reading them novel length books earlier.

Most MC and UMC parents read to their kids nightly until school age. But they mostly read picture books, and the tendency is to stop reading on e kids can read a picture book themselves, around K. They might still "read together" but the focus will be on encouraging the child to read to them. I actually think pushing kids to read aloud to parents is when many kids stop enjoying books, because reading aloud is much harder than just reading, and especially for a new reader, it can feel like a chore.

Instead, I would encourage parents to continue to read to their kids, and to start reading chapter books as soon as their kid can tolerate it (choose extremely engaging books so that the lack of pictures will bother them less, and the excitement will sustain interest over multiple nights as you read).

And then keep reading. If you read good, engaging novels to kids, they will develop an interest in reading no matter what. Yes you also separately have to support reading skills. If they aren't getting proper phonics instruction in school, do a program like Hooked on Phonics at home. They need 10-15 minutes a day, minimum, of phonics instruction until it clicks. But that's different from reading for pleasure, and if you want your kids to read independently for pleasure, you have to read to them in a way that shows them how mature, more advanced books can be pleasurable.

I would read TO your kids as long as possible, all the way through elementary ideally. Even after you stop reading to them, I'd suggest keeping up the habit of reading together, and spending 20-30 minutes each evening as a family reading in the same room, even if you are all reading different books. No screens except a e-book reader.

This is what it takes.

Sorry doesn't ring true to me. My parents never ever read to me and I devoured books as a kid. Read everything I could get my hands on. I didn't want to be read at or to, I read myself. You can't force kids to love reading. They either do or they don't.

I'm the PP and I was like you -- loved to read even though my parents never read to me, was an advanced reader in elementary.

But I went to school in a school system that assigned a lot of novels, forced me to read and think about classic (and challenging) books, and had high expectations for my reading and writing ability. Our kids are not in that environment. Plus they have the distraction of handheld screens everywhere, especially at school.

I also disagree that kids either love reading or don't. Would you say the same about music or movies? Some people just can't watch movies, that's how it is? I think as long as kids can find a way to experience the pure pleasure of reading a really engaging story, they will love it. The problem is that many kids lag behind in reading ability or have learning disorders to overcome, and this makes reading arduous and unpleasant. By the time they are proficient in reading, they have negative associations with reading and don't seek out engaging texts (or resort to graphic novels because they are easier to read) and therefore never "level up" in the kinds of books they read, and just don't experience the pleasure of reading challenging but very engaging literature.

If parents keep reading to kids through elementary, you can fix all these problems. You can provide your kids with the classic and challenging literature that MCPS will not. You can show them what it feels like to read a longer novel start to finish, and the pleasures associated with this task. You can give them a break from their own reading challenges that can make reading feel like a chore, while still building their vocabulary, experiencing advanced story structure, etc.

If people really don't have the time for 30 minutes of reading a night with kids, you could maybe approximate this with audio books. But I think it's better if parents read with kids because I've found that this makes it easier to ensure kids are following the story, to stop and answer questions about what words mean or what is happening, and to ensure the reading material is age appropriate and not too scary or boring.

I have 3 kids. Read to all of them. One loves to read, one hates it, and one prefers to build intricate Lego structures and stages battle scenes and draws a lot. They are who they are. They are all great readers but they don't all love to read or do it for fun.

How old are they?

What difference does it make? They are late elem school and high school. Not 6 yr olds.

The whole point is reading to them well past when they are 6 years old, so that's why. The implication is that if you'd continued reading to them throughout elementary instead of deciding "oh well some kids just don't like books" then all of your kids would be independent readers instead of just the one who happened to like it without you supporting it much.

Lots of skills are like this. You can let your kids self-select into sports or playing instruments, but some families will find a way to encourage such that all their kids ultimately do it. That's why you see families where all the kids are HS athletes or they are all proficient at piano and violin. It's not an accident -- their parents cultivated that interest instead of just waiting to see which kids naturally gravitated towards those activities.

Well reading is similar. Sure, some kids will like reading no matter what. But you can turn just about any kid into a reader with the right support, just like just about any kid can become proficient at dance or soccer or music if you really prioritize it and find ways to get your kids engaged and willing to do it. And parents also doing these activities will make it much more likely kids will do them too, I've noticed.

I could read to one of my kids all day until I was blue in the face. They would never become a big reader. Just because you can force piano playing until proficiency, it doesn't mean you have a kid who loves playing the piano. Incidentally the kid who doesn't read for fun reads quite well, many grades above level, but alas, does not love it. Why does a kid have to love it to be good at it? They aren't the same. I'm good at a lot of things I don't love to do. So I disagree with the premise that by brute force your kid will have no choice but to love the things their parents have prioritized for them. Ask kids who are now adults how they feel about that sort of parenting.

In my experience, proficiency breeds enjoyment. Sure, there may be some people who are good at things and don't enjoy them, but it's not something I see often. A kid who loves reading is generally going to be better at, and I also think from a practical standpoint, if your goal is to enable your kid to be able to read longer, denser, and more complicated texts as they proceed into higher education, I think it's going to be hard for them to get to that point unless they read a lot. It would be like expecting a kid to do higher level math without ever doing any math except what was assigned in school. I guess it's possible, but it's really unlikely.

I also don't think this is about "forcing" anything. I think the idea is to find a way to make it pleasurable. I think when parents prioritize certain activities, they are highly motivated to find ways for their kids to want to do them. Maybe it's finding the right teacher (or in the case of reading, the right books), offering rewards, allowing a lot of freedom in how they engage in practice, you name it.

Well, that's your experience. My DH was pushed pretty hard by his parents growing up and was very successful academically, but he probably picks up a book for pleasure reading twice a year. It's just not his thing. I guess maybe my MIL didn't offer enough rewards for him in childhood to foster a love for reading, lol.

DP— maybe getting off topic, but I think it doesn’t always carry into adulthood because life gets busy. DH and I were voracious readers as children and adolescents, but neither of us finds much time for pleasure reading these days. Not necessarily the case for your DH but I think it’s pretty common. Separately I still hope to get back to it, maybe after I get out of the weeds with little kids. I mean, I read A LOT, just mostly to them, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree, but banning graphic novels is not the smartest move. It was the transition for my then 8 yr old son to go from not reading, to reading voraciously.

Yes! Graphic novels can be great for kids who don't like to read. Get age-appropriate, quality ones with complex storylines. My goal is to get my 8th grader to read "Maus" before he goes off to high school. And my kids embraced a lot of series that are part graphic novel, part text, like the Last Kids on Earth books.

Also, while books are important, don't waste opportunities to read in other areas. When young, DS played a role-play fantasy-type computer game with his Dad that involved a lot of dialog--you had to read different responses and choose them for your character. And there were a lot of conversations in that game. He swears that taught him to read, not his teachers. I give his teachers way more credit, but it motivated him to start caring about reading. We usually keep the captions on movies and tv shows to reinforce text with audio, and I got a subscription to kids' weekly news magazine and forced my kids to read at least a few items each week. They're short, but it introduced them to a more news-style form of writing.

And if you can get them to read books, look for good writers--people who really know how to use language and throw in challenging vocabulary. I've read novels out loud to my kids and you can definitely tell the difference. Good writing is a pleasure to read out loud. Cliche and weaker writing is a slog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to give a piece of advice about raising readers based on my experience:

You need to read to your kids way more, and way longer, than most people do. You also need to start reading them novel length books earlier.

Most MC and UMC parents read to their kids nightly until school age. But they mostly read picture books, and the tendency is to stop reading on e kids can read a picture book themselves, around K. They might still "read together" but the focus will be on encouraging the child to read to them. I actually think pushing kids to read aloud to parents is when many kids stop enjoying books, because reading aloud is much harder than just reading, and especially for a new reader, it can feel like a chore.

Instead, I would encourage parents to continue to read to their kids, and to start reading chapter books as soon as their kid can tolerate it (choose extremely engaging books so that the lack of pictures will bother them less, and the excitement will sustain interest over multiple nights as you read).

And then keep reading. If you read good, engaging novels to kids, they will develop an interest in reading no matter what. Yes you also separately have to support reading skills. If they aren't getting proper phonics instruction in school, do a program like Hooked on Phonics at home. They need 10-15 minutes a day, minimum, of phonics instruction until it clicks. But that's different from reading for pleasure, and if you want your kids to read independently for pleasure, you have to read to them in a way that shows them how mature, more advanced books can be pleasurable.

I would read TO your kids as long as possible, all the way through elementary ideally. Even after you stop reading to them, I'd suggest keeping up the habit of reading together, and spending 20-30 minutes each evening as a family reading in the same room, even if you are all reading different books. No screens except a e-book reader.

This is what it takes.

Sorry doesn't ring true to me. My parents never ever read to me and I devoured books as a kid. Read everything I could get my hands on. I didn't want to be read at or to, I read myself. You can't force kids to love reading. They either do or they don't.

I'm the PP and I was like you -- loved to read even though my parents never read to me, was an advanced reader in elementary.

But I went to school in a school system that assigned a lot of novels, forced me to read and think about classic (and challenging) books, and had high expectations for my reading and writing ability. Our kids are not in that environment. Plus they have the distraction of handheld screens everywhere, especially at school.

I also disagree that kids either love reading or don't. Would you say the same about music or movies? Some people just can't watch movies, that's how it is? I think as long as kids can find a way to experience the pure pleasure of reading a really engaging story, they will love it. The problem is that many kids lag behind in reading ability or have learning disorders to overcome, and this makes reading arduous and unpleasant. By the time they are proficient in reading, they have negative associations with reading and don't seek out engaging texts (or resort to graphic novels because they are easier to read) and therefore never "level up" in the kinds of books they read, and just don't experience the pleasure of reading challenging but very engaging literature.

If parents keep reading to kids through elementary, you can fix all these problems. You can provide your kids with the classic and challenging literature that MCPS will not. You can show them what it feels like to read a longer novel start to finish, and the pleasures associated with this task. You can give them a break from their own reading challenges that can make reading feel like a chore, while still building their vocabulary, experiencing advanced story structure, etc.

If people really don't have the time for 30 minutes of reading a night with kids, you could maybe approximate this with audio books. But I think it's better if parents read with kids because I've found that this makes it easier to ensure kids are following the story, to stop and answer questions about what words mean or what is happening, and to ensure the reading material is age appropriate and not too scary or boring.

I have 3 kids. Read to all of them. One loves to read, one hates it, and one prefers to build intricate Lego structures and stages battle scenes and draws a lot. They are who they are. They are all great readers but they don't all love to read or do it for fun.

How old are they?

What difference does it make? They are late elem school and high school. Not 6 yr olds.

The whole point is reading to them well past when they are 6 years old, so that's why. The implication is that if you'd continued reading to them throughout elementary instead of deciding "oh well some kids just don't like books" then all of your kids would be independent readers instead of just the one who happened to like it without you supporting it much.

Lots of skills are like this. You can let your kids self-select into sports or playing instruments, but some families will find a way to encourage such that all their kids ultimately do it. That's why you see families where all the kids are HS athletes or they are all proficient at piano and violin. It's not an accident -- their parents cultivated that interest instead of just waiting to see which kids naturally gravitated towards those activities.

Well reading is similar. Sure, some kids will like reading no matter what. But you can turn just about any kid into a reader with the right support, just like just about any kid can become proficient at dance or soccer or music if you really prioritize it and find ways to get your kids engaged and willing to do it. And parents also doing these activities will make it much more likely kids will do them too, I've noticed.

I could read to one of my kids all day until I was blue in the face. They would never become a big reader. Just because you can force piano playing until proficiency, it doesn't mean you have a kid who loves playing the piano. Incidentally the kid who doesn't read for fun reads quite well, many grades above level, but alas, does not love it. Why does a kid have to love it to be good at it? They aren't the same. I'm good at a lot of things I don't love to do. So I disagree with the premise that by brute force your kid will have no choice but to love the things their parents have prioritized for them. Ask kids who are now adults how they feel about that sort of parenting.

In my experience, proficiency breeds enjoyment. Sure, there may be some people who are good at things and don't enjoy them, but it's not something I see often. A kid who loves reading is generally going to be better at, and I also think from a practical standpoint, if your goal is to enable your kid to be able to read longer, denser, and more complicated texts as they proceed into higher education, I think it's going to be hard for them to get to that point unless they read a lot. It would be like expecting a kid to do higher level math without ever doing any math except what was assigned in school. I guess it's possible, but it's really unlikely.

I also don't think this is about "forcing" anything. I think the idea is to find a way to make it pleasurable. I think when parents prioritize certain activities, they are highly motivated to find ways for their kids to want to do them. Maybe it's finding the right teacher (or in the case of reading, the right books), offering rewards, allowing a lot of freedom in how they engage in practice, you name it.

Well, that's your experience. My DH was pushed pretty hard by his parents growing up and was very successful academically, but he probably picks up a book for pleasure reading twice a year. It's just not his thing. I guess maybe my MIL didn't offer enough rewards for him in childhood to foster a love for reading, lol.

DP— maybe getting off topic, but I think it doesn’t always carry into adulthood because life gets busy. DH and I were voracious readers as children and adolescents, but neither of us finds much time for pleasure reading these days. Not necessarily the case for your DH but I think it’s pretty common. Separately I still hope to get back to it, maybe after I get out of the weeds with little kids. I mean, I read A LOT, just mostly to them, lol.

Very true. My dad was such a big reader as a kid that he won some kind of award from the local library for reading more books in a year than anyone had ever read before. He's a really bright person and would read anything, fiction or nonfiction.

As an adult he watches a lot of TV and reads magazines sometimes. Many people stop reading for pleasure in or after college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to give a piece of advice about raising readers based on my experience:

You need to read to your kids way more, and way longer, than most people do. You also need to start reading them novel length books earlier.

Most MC and UMC parents read to their kids nightly until school age. But they mostly read picture books, and the tendency is to stop reading on e kids can read a picture book themselves, around K. They might still "read together" but the focus will be on encouraging the child to read to them. I actually think pushing kids to read aloud to parents is when many kids stop enjoying books, because reading aloud is much harder than just reading, and especially for a new reader, it can feel like a chore.

Instead, I would encourage parents to continue to read to their kids, and to start reading chapter books as soon as their kid can tolerate it (choose extremely engaging books so that the lack of pictures will bother them less, and the excitement will sustain interest over multiple nights as you read).

And then keep reading. If you read good, engaging novels to kids, they will develop an interest in reading no matter what. Yes you also separately have to support reading skills. If they aren't getting proper phonics instruction in school, do a program like Hooked on Phonics at home. They need 10-15 minutes a day, minimum, of phonics instruction until it clicks. But that's different from reading for pleasure, and if you want your kids to read independently for pleasure, you have to read to them in a way that shows them how mature, more advanced books can be pleasurable.

I would read TO your kids as long as possible, all the way through elementary ideally. Even after you stop reading to them, I'd suggest keeping up the habit of reading together, and spending 20-30 minutes each evening as a family reading in the same room, even if you are all reading different books. No screens except a e-book reader.

This is what it takes.

Sorry doesn't ring true to me. My parents never ever read to me and I devoured books as a kid. Read everything I could get my hands on. I didn't want to be read at or to, I read myself. You can't force kids to love reading. They either do or they don't.

I'm the PP and I was like you -- loved to read even though my parents never read to me, was an advanced reader in elementary.

But I went to school in a school system that assigned a lot of novels, forced me to read and think about classic (and challenging) books, and had high expectations for my reading and writing ability. Our kids are not in that environment. Plus they have the distraction of handheld screens everywhere, especially at school.

I also disagree that kids either love reading or don't. Would you say the same about music or movies? Some people just can't watch movies, that's how it is? I think as long as kids can find a way to experience the pure pleasure of reading a really engaging story, they will love it. The problem is that many kids lag behind in reading ability or have learning disorders to overcome, and this makes reading arduous and unpleasant. By the time they are proficient in reading, they have negative associations with reading and don't seek out engaging texts (or resort to graphic novels because they are easier to read) and therefore never "level up" in the kinds of books they read, and just don't experience the pleasure of reading challenging but very engaging literature.

If parents keep reading to kids through elementary, you can fix all these problems. You can provide your kids with the classic and challenging literature that MCPS will not. You can show them what it feels like to read a longer novel start to finish, and the pleasures associated with this task. You can give them a break from their own reading challenges that can make reading feel like a chore, while still building their vocabulary, experiencing advanced story structure, etc.

If people really don't have the time for 30 minutes of reading a night with kids, you could maybe approximate this with audio books. But I think it's better if parents read with kids because I've found that this makes it easier to ensure kids are following the story, to stop and answer questions about what words mean or what is happening, and to ensure the reading material is age appropriate and not too scary or boring.

I have 3 kids. Read to all of them. One loves to read, one hates it, and one prefers to build intricate Lego structures and stages battle scenes and draws a lot. They are who they are. They are all great readers but they don't all love to read or do it for fun.

How old are they?

What difference does it make? They are late elem school and high school. Not 6 yr olds.

The whole point is reading to them well past when they are 6 years old, so that's why. The implication is that if you'd continued reading to them throughout elementary instead of deciding "oh well some kids just don't like books" then all of your kids would be independent readers instead of just the one who happened to like it without you supporting it much.

Lots of skills are like this. You can let your kids self-select into sports or playing instruments, but some families will find a way to encourage such that all their kids ultimately do it. That's why you see families where all the kids are HS athletes or they are all proficient at piano and violin. It's not an accident -- their parents cultivated that interest instead of just waiting to see which kids naturally gravitated towards those activities.

Well reading is similar. Sure, some kids will like reading no matter what. But you can turn just about any kid into a reader with the right support, just like just about any kid can become proficient at dance or soccer or music if you really prioritize it and find ways to get your kids engaged and willing to do it. And parents also doing these activities will make it much more likely kids will do them too, I've noticed.

I could read to one of my kids all day until I was blue in the face. They would never become a big reader. Just because you can force piano playing until proficiency, it doesn't mean you have a kid who loves playing the piano. Incidentally the kid who doesn't read for fun reads quite well, many grades above level, but alas, does not love it. Why does a kid have to love it to be good at it? They aren't the same. I'm good at a lot of things I don't love to do. So I disagree with the premise that by brute force your kid will have no choice but to love the things their parents have prioritized for them. Ask kids who are now adults how they feel about that sort of parenting.

In my experience, proficiency breeds enjoyment. Sure, there may be some people who are good at things and don't enjoy them, but it's not something I see often. A kid who loves reading is generally going to be better at, and I also think from a practical standpoint, if your goal is to enable your kid to be able to read longer, denser, and more complicated texts as they proceed into higher education, I think it's going to be hard for them to get to that point unless they read a lot. It would be like expecting a kid to do higher level math without ever doing any math except what was assigned in school. I guess it's possible, but it's really unlikely.

I also don't think this is about "forcing" anything. I think the idea is to find a way to make it pleasurable. I think when parents prioritize certain activities, they are highly motivated to find ways for their kids to want to do them. Maybe it's finding the right teacher (or in the case of reading, the right books), offering rewards, allowing a lot of freedom in how they engage in practice, you name it.

Well, that's your experience. My DH was pushed pretty hard by his parents growing up and was very successful academically, but he probably picks up a book for pleasure reading twice a year. It's just not his thing. I guess maybe my MIL didn't offer enough rewards for him in childhood to foster a love for reading, lol.

DP— maybe getting off topic, but I think it doesn’t always carry into adulthood because life gets busy. DH and I were voracious readers as children and adolescents, but neither of us finds much time for pleasure reading these days. Not necessarily the case for your DH but I think it’s pretty common. Separately I still hope to get back to it, maybe after I get out of the weeds with little kids. I mean, I read A LOT, just mostly to them, lol.

Very true. My dad was such a big reader as a kid that he won some kind of award from the local library for reading more books in a year than anyone had ever read before. He's a really bright person and would read anything, fiction or nonfiction.

As an adult he watches a lot of TV and reads magazines sometimes. Many people stop reading for pleasure in or after college.

Yes, and stopping pleasure reading doesn’t mean they aren’t reading a lot for their career or because they consume a lot of news, etc. There are many ways adults choose to read — for kids it’s mostly the for fun stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am overloaded as a parent as are many of you. I saw a stat that most Americans read at below an 8th grade level- many are at a 6th grade level or lower. I then panicked when I found out late to the game that MCPS has been a complete shit show for reading, including not using instructional materials based on the science of reading and having students read below grade level texts.

I started mandating reading at home, because I was worried that my kids would not progress beyond 8th grade- despite having both parents who went to grad school.

No more graphic novels at home and reading at least 2 hours a week of grade level or higher texts. In a few months, DS had read more books at home then for all of middle school.

It's sad that mcps cannot be trusted to do the basics but here we are.

Newsflash. Students reading outside of school is a different issue than the problems within schools. The great majority of high achievers read or do math outside of school. You should have been reading to your kids and requiring them to read at home before kindergarten! This is a parenting issue.

Well that's not equitable. Kids with busy or lazy parents deserve top-flight childcare and education too.

[Anonymous]

Maus?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am overloaded as a parent as are many of you. I saw a stat that most Americans read at below an 8th grade level- many are at a 6th grade level or lower. I then panicked when I found out late to the game that MCPS has been a complete shit show for reading, including not using instructional materials based on the science of reading and having students read below grade level texts.

I started mandating reading at home, because I was worried that my kids would not progress beyond 8th grade- despite having both parents who went to grad school.

No more graphic novels at home and reading at least 2 hours a week of grade level or higher texts. In a few months, DS had read more books at home then for all of middle school.

It's sad that mcps cannot be trusted to do the basics but here we are.

I also suggest having them do extended writing outside of school. Especially your boys. If they want something, make them writing a detailed request.

[Anonymous]

Can your kids read at grade level? If so, it sounds like the schools did their jobs. What you require at home if your job. I did most of my reading outside of school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am overloaded as a parent as are many of you. I saw a stat that most Americans read at below an 8th grade level- many are at a 6th grade level or lower. I then panicked when I found out late to the game that MCPS has been a complete shit show for reading, including not using instructional materials based on the science of reading and having students read below grade level texts.

I started mandating reading at home, because I was worried that my kids would not progress beyond 8th grade- despite having both parents who went to grad school.

No more graphic novels at home and reading at least 2 hours a week of grade level or higher texts. In a few months, DS had read more books at home then for all of middle school.

It's sad that mcps cannot be trusted to do the basics but here we are.

This post seems repetitive of others. I'm convinced there is a troll at there trying to make trouble.

It’s possible this is a troll- but much more likely another parent realizing MCPS doesn’t teach the basics well!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am overloaded as a parent as are many of you. I saw a stat that most Americans read at below an 8th grade level- many are at a 6th grade level or lower. I then panicked when I found out late to the game that MCPS has been a complete shit show for reading, including not using instructional materials based on the science of reading and having students read below grade level texts.

I started mandating reading at home, because I was worried that my kids would not progress beyond 8th grade- despite having both parents who went to grad school.

No more graphic novels at home and reading at least 2 hours a week of grade level or higher texts. In a few months, DS had read more books at home then for all of middle school.

It's sad that mcps cannot be trusted to do the basics but here we are.

This post seems repetitive of others. I'm convinced there is a troll at there trying to make trouble.

It’s possible this is a troll- but much more likely another parent realizing MCPS doesn’t teach the basics well!

OP here- not a troll, just a concerned parent