My theory - GenX vs Millennial parents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an older X that had kids late. So, most of my peers have kids that are older than ours, but I saw them parenting before I had kids. Most of the parents of my children's peers are millennials and I see them when our kids get together.

I have seen both types (relaxed vs helicopter) parents from every generation. I think the generalizations are stereotypes and you can't really stereotype based on age or generation.

I'm a Xennial (right on the cusp in 1980) and I agree with this. My friend group spans 15 year easily, the younger being firmly millenials, the older being firmly Gen X. There's not one age group that helicopters more than the other. These types of anecdotes are something OP is observing in her friend group, but you aren't able to make sweeping generational assumptions based on just your friends. It runs the gamut.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The latchkey generation is handsoff with child rearing? Ya don't say....

Xers need to let this latchkey kid thing go. Do you think millennials suddenly had parents at home after school for some reason? No, ours were working too. We all ate bagel bites and watched trl unsupervised. Xers aren't special.

I think they think it makes them sound cool?

No. But it defines us because, while it became commonplace later, we were the first generation that had latchkey kids because we had working mothers. Yes, now, many families are like this, but when it happened in the 70s and 80s, there was no precedent for this. Boomers and silent generation kids were never left alone like that. [/b]Their parents always had a SAHM or the kids went with their parents to employment.[b]

That is a quite inaccurate statement and likely only describes middle-upper class families anyway. My dad who is 75 and thus firmly in the “boomer” generation was a latchkey kid of a single working mother. He grew up w many other kids who also were latchkey kids of dual-income families or single parent families. This was in a poor, working class area. There were no affordable childcare options for working mothers then and not all mothers could simply take kids to work w them (my grandmother couldn’t take my dad w to her workplace).

Yes, my parents are Boomers and they had working mothers. They were working class families. They probably had older siblings or other relatives watching them after school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The latchkey generation is handsoff with child rearing? Ya don't say....

Xers need to let this latchkey kid thing go. Do you think millennials suddenly had parents at home after school for some reason? No, ours were working too. We all ate bagel bites and watched trl unsupervised. Xers aren't special.

I think they think it makes them sound cool?

Genxer and former latchkey kid here..

It wasn't "cool", but it was definitely more acceptable for parents to leave younger kids home alone after school back then than today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First - I am GenX.

I have two kids about 5 years apart and over time have noticed that the parents of the older ones classmates tend to skew toward Xers while the younger’s classmates parents skew toward Millennials.

I also did some volunteer work for both kids ECs over an extended period of time so had lots of interactions with parents.

There is a very clear difference to me between the X parents vs the Millennials (who I’m going to call Ys bc it’s too darn long to type out Millennials.)

Xers tend to be more laid back, don’t overshare, do not have as much hands on guidance with their kids.

Ys helicopter. They need to get every single question answered on their kids behalf, know “why” everything is the way it is, share all their kid’s problems.

My younger kid is entering middle school and I am watching the constant stream of questions on the class Facebook page and it is alarming.

Tell me I am wrong about this. These kids are going to ba a hot mess as adults. Their parents do everything for them

The millennial moms trend way more Karen than prior generations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven’t seen this but it would make some sense because the Gen y kids were helicoptered themselves so that’s what they grew up with. The Gen X kids grew up more free range and tend to be sort of more lax about most things in life anyway.

[Anonymous]

Gen-x raised gen-z, results speak for themselves…lol.

[Anonymous]

I think this is more of a cultural and UMC related.

[Anonymous]

I was born in 1968, and I can tell you firsthand that the 70s were a very interesting time to be a child. We were left to our own devices in many ways, and it was not unusual for there to be hours of time where our parents only had a vague idea about exactly where we were or what we were up to. We were expected to amuse ourselves in basement playrooms, backyards, pools(!), and neighborhood playgrounds. As long as there was no blood, property damage, or excessive noise involved, no one with any sense of responsibility seemed to care what went on.

I have Gen Y cousins, born in the early 80s, and I could see that they were better supervised as children than my friends and I were. That era saw the advent of helicopter parenting, and it wasn't a bad thing in and of itself. There would have been a lot fewer ER visits and incidents of bullying had adults been paying more attention to their Gen X offspring were doing.

For better or for worse, most Gen Y parents didn't get to experience the kind of freedom Gen X parents had as children. While we see the need for more adult involvement in children's daily lives, we also know the joy and value in letting kids do their own thing together and not step in until we're truly needed.

[Anonymous]

For the Xs the classmate is their second child; for Ys the classmate is their first child.

Your observations may be accurate, but they have sample bias.

[Anonymous]

Younger parents expect more or at least a minimum standard, out of the public schools x parents don't care about underperforming schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look at a college parent facebook page for a true read on the helicopter parents.

Same for my son's college FB page. It's hard to believe some of these parents let their kids go to college without them.

[Anonymous]

The main differemces I see (as a Gen X) is that Millennial parents have a broader definition of disabilities, are more conflict/risk averse, and are really into pop psychology. But those observations also suffer from selection bias since, assuming children of the same age, the Gen X parents are older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Millennial here. We all sort of think Gen X was the worst generation. So, maybe we just don’t want to be anything like you?

I think boomers are the worst but X’ers have this insanely annoying need to be special / unique / laid back / not like other people and it’s so obnoxious

They do give off an intense “not like other girls” energy. Try hards hiding behind a facade of laid back nonchalance.

Ha ha ha. You're right but it's not the negative that you think it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The latchkey generation is handsoff with child rearing? Ya don't say....

Xers need to let this latchkey kid thing go. Do you think millennials suddenly had parents at home after school for some reason? No, ours were working too. We all ate bagel bites and watched trl unsupervised. Xers aren't special.

I think they think it makes them sound cool?

Genxer and former latchkey kid here..

It wasn't "cool", but it was definitely more acceptable for parents to leave younger kids home alone after school back then than today.

Interesting. Most everyone I was friends with had stay at home mothers except the single ones. Starting in middle school we were pretty much on our own, no communication from your sleepovers Friday until Sunday when you called for a pick up.

[Anonymous]

Based on the way our country is I don’t think any kids in these groups are going to beOK. The stress and anxiety is unprecedented. These parents and kids have lived through 9/11, the DC sniper, school shootings and extreme competitiveness. These generations are going to deal with the problems brought on by this administration for the rest of their lives. Let’s stop being critical and let’s go out of our way to encourage and support young families.
There is no way it’s going to end well for these generations. They are paying the price, and will continue to, for the rest of their lives.