Girls in middle school: underwear/locker room question

[Anonymous]

We are in a similar situation. My daughter basically said, "I don't want to wear a bra, it doesn't feel good, I'd rather be comfortable".

I asked her about changing in gym and I guess they don't have to if they are wearing athletic clothes.

[Anonymous]

My son wore athletic clothes to school every day and did not change for PE even once the entire time he was in middle school. 8th grade was last year in FCPS. They may not even change clothes.

[Anonymous]

I’d provide a few of the thin tank types. Middle schoolers just don’t have a filter and may say something and she will change her mind. She’s not going to listen to her mom at this age so general rule of thumb is to led it ride unless it’s super important and serious, nipples not being that IMO

[Anonymous]

Are showers required?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Firstly, even if you're 75, you should not be using the word "brassiere". Just retire that word.

Secondly, my kids said by the spring of 6th grade, EVERY girl was wearing a bralette whether or not they needed one, except for the one really weird girl.

Thirdly, she can just wear whatever kind of top they have to wear on gym days so she doesn't have to change. My DD got two white t-shirts and wore them all day. She didn't care because "Nobody sweats in gym, and anyway it's my 2nd to last class of the day."

OP here.

See, it's because of people like you and your children that I'm mildly worried.
And I use the word brassiere, OP, because in my native language that's the actual word. I thought it was also used in English.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:7th grade is pretty late for not wearing a bra. Not to be crude but can’t you see her nipples through her shirt sometimes?

Omg nipples lol

Grow up
And leave your crap church fake morals at home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Firstly, even if you're 75, you should not be using the word "brassiere". Just retire that word.

Secondly, my kids said by the spring of 6th grade, EVERY girl was wearing a bralette whether or not they needed one, except for the one really weird girl.

Thirdly, she can just wear whatever kind of top they have to wear on gym days so she doesn't have to change. My DD got two white t-shirts and wore them all day. She didn't care because "Nobody sweats in gym, and anyway it's my 2nd to last class of the day."

OP here.

See, it's because of people like you and your children that I'm mildly worried.
And I use the word brassiere, OP, because in my native language that's the actual word. I thought it was also used in English.

Only 70 year olds use it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is a rising 7th grader and new to her middle school. She will have PE every day and change in the locker room. She is very small for her age and barely starting to develop. Do girls wear brassieres at that stage? She says they're uncomfortable and she doesn't see why she needs an extra piece of clothing. On the other hand, I don't know what the social situation is like, and whether there is any undercurrent to wearing, or not wearing, such items. For the rest of the school day, I don't want there to be any show-through in the A/C, in case she gets teased. Her good friend only wears sporty clothes, with sport bras, and DD likes the cottage look.

Any advice is much appreciated. I know this seems like such a minor detail, but suddenly I'm wondering!

Yes, most girls wear some time of bra. If she doesn't want to, she can wear a camisole (light, spaghetti strap undershirt) or she can wear a bralette. My DD is 14 and still wears bralettes, because they are so comfortable. Here are kids camisoles from target since you daughter is tiny: https://www.target.com/p/girls-hanes-5pk-camisole-white-gray-pink/-/A-50302682?preselect=17296990#lnk=sametab and these are the bralettes my DD likes: https://www.target.com/p/women-s-2pk-seamless-bralette-auden/-/A-82150614?preselect=82109395#lnk=sametab or https://www.target.com/p/vanity-fair-womens-beyond-comfort-seamless-wireless-bralette-2-pack-2171941/-/A-85735420?preselect=85735438#lnk=sametab

[Anonymous]

Aerie makes really cute sports bras and bralettes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Firstly, even if you're 75, you should not be using the word "brassiere". Just retire that word.

Secondly, my kids said by the spring of 6th grade, EVERY girl was wearing a bralette whether or not they needed one, except for the one really weird girl.

Thirdly, she can just wear whatever kind of top they have to wear on gym days so she doesn't have to change. My DD got two white t-shirts and wore them all day. She didn't care because "Nobody sweats in gym, and anyway it's my 2nd to last class of the day."

OP here.

See, it's because of people like you and your children that I'm mildly worried.
And I use the word brassiere, OP, because in my native language that's the actual word. I thought it was also used in English.

This.

+1

DD 13 resisted too at first. At each step of the way I had to keep buying and gently nudging lol. We started with camis for a long time (around 10 or 11),
then eventually moved to sports bras. And finally this summer she started wearing the little Calvin Klein cotton triangle bras I bought her about 18 months ago! And last week, we went to VS & she tried on and bought her first real real bra. Me: “This is cute! Wanna try it on?” I’ve asked that question a million times over the last year or so. I couldn’t believe she said yes this time!
Moral of the story, they’ll come around on their own time, but also some gentle counsel from us is still important too. Negotiating the push and pull back is still something im trying to learn, but im learning. You will too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Firstly, even if you're 75, you should not be using the word "brassiere". Just retire that word.

Secondly, my kids said by the spring of 6th grade, EVERY girl was wearing a bralette whether or not they needed one, except for the one really weird girl.

Thirdly, she can just wear whatever kind of top they have to wear on gym days so she doesn't have to change. My DD got two white t-shirts and wore them all day. She didn't care because "Nobody sweats in gym, and anyway it's my 2nd to last class of the day."

Who appointed you to be the word police? You know what it means so STFU.

[Anonymous]

Just buy her some camisoles and bralettes and offer them to her, then leave it to her to decide what to do.

Fwiw my dd never changed clothes in all of middle school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Firstly, even if you're 75, you should not be using the word "brassiere". Just retire that word.

Secondly, my kids said by the spring of 6th grade, EVERY girl was wearing a bralette whether or not they needed one, except for the one really weird girl.

Thirdly, she can just wear whatever kind of top they have to wear on gym days so she doesn't have to change. My DD got two white t-shirts and wore them all day. She didn't care because "Nobody sweats in gym, and anyway it's my 2nd to last class of the day."

OP here.

See, it's because of people like you and your children that I'm mildly worried.
And I use the word brassiere, OP, because in my native language that's the actual word. I thought it was also used in English.

Only 70 year olds use it.

Bustenhalter!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:7th grade is pretty late for not wearing a bra. Not to be crude but can’t you see her nipples through her shirt sometimes?

NP but no this isn’t a problem. Nipples often show through even with a bra. Nipples are normal. I won’t force my DD to wear some foam padded/molded round boob shaped monstrosity bc of nipple fear. Unlined bras are much more comfortable.

Hopefully, if your child ever decides they feel more comfortable in these "monstrosities", you'll be okay with it. Some people do actually find lined bras, underwire bras, and all of these other things that apparently we're not supposed to like post-COVID anymore comfortable. You do you, maybe let the rest of us wear what we want without all the horror and pearl-clutching?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At my child's FCPS MS, no one changed for PE. It was optional.

This must vary by school. At DD's FCPS MS, they were told explicitly that they cannot spend the rest of the school day in their stinky gym clothes, so after PE, they must change.

OP, my DD wears sports bras. There are a few tops that she uses with bralettes, but for the most part, she wears sports bras. Seems fairly common in her friends group.