How do you split the bill when going out with friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bring cash, tally in head + tip, place cash in receipt holder.

Sure but sometimes (often) the people who do this are stingy or can't do math or undertip and then the person figuring out the final tally gets stuck with the difference.

This times a million!

-former server

[Anonymous]

Usually split down the middle but our friends tend to have similar financial situations. Often if someone's share is significantly more, they might offer to take care of the whole top but generally we find it evens itself out. But I will say, I don't get offended if someone wants to itemize or whatever. People have different financial situations and sensitivities and budgets and it won't ruin either the meal or the friendship for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We typically split everything down the middle with friends. Someone always has an extra drink or a more expensive meal - if it's friends, are you really keeping track? If there are kids, if we're 4 ppl and you are 5 ppl, divide by 9 and do the math. If it's younger people (nieces/nephews) we pick up the check. Do the same for our kids friends - if they are with us, we're paying. If it's people who are really scraping by, we entertain at home and serve the food we want to and no one expects to pay for that except us.

Voice of reason.

I think it comes down to this: if you can't afford to eat out, DON'T. (And I say this as a person who passed up plenty of invitations during leaner times.)

Being able to afford YOUR MEAL is not the same as being able to afford to pay for the meal of a millionaire buying bottles of wine. Is this really hard to grasp? You are either clueless or deliberately obtuse.

C'mon, if you don't have two dimes to rub together, should you be hanging out with "millionaires" and then bitch that they spend a lot of money?

C'mon, if you're a millionaire, should you be splitting hairs about someone not wanting to pay for your food, or should you just pick up the bill like a decent person??

OP here. I don't talk about our HHI so I doubt others know our HHI. I don't pick my friends based on their incomes. My two favorite friends are a teacher and a SAHM military spouse. They are down to earth and super fun to hang out with. I always pick free or cheap places when hanging out with them because I know they don't have as much money. They are both super generous. Generosity has nothing to do with income.

But you know it, despite your next post that shows how out of touch with reality you really are. So YOU know you could afford to pick up everyone's tab. So why didn't you? If you and friends don't discuss HHI, how do you know your "new friends" could afford it?

[Anonymous]

We decide before we order. Depends on what we got. If it is huge group we will try to split it either individually or each person pays a fraction. This way the person who ordered the appetizer and soda isn't feeling pissed about having to pay $25 when everyone else ordered entrees and cocktails.

Anonymous wrote:Does it differ if you are going out with other couples or families with different numbers and ages of kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Read your post and wouldn't you think its strange to not think you are comfortable or even rich given you income levels. You live very comfortably. To go out and expect the bill to be split equally on you income when someone may make 1/5 that is unreasonable. Pay your share.

[Anonymous]

Credit card roulette

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bring cash, tally in head + tip, place cash in receipt holder.

Sure but sometimes (often) the people who do this are stingy or can't do math or undertip and then the person figuring out the final tally gets stuck with the difference.

This times a million!

-former server

They forget the tax. "My entree was $10 and my drink was $7 so here's $20." Wrong.

[Anonymous]

When I go out, I want to order what I want, And not worry about how it compares to what my dining companions are ordering. But it's just not all that difficult to keep a mental tally of what I'm ordering, and then just round up slightly (just in case) and then add another 30% for tax and tip. Easy peasy. If I couldn't easily afford it, I wouldn't order it.

There are cases where I have regular dining buddies who also freely order, and in that case we all seem to agree on splitting the check for ease at the end of the night. All good. But there are many, many other times when there's a wide variety in what everyone is ordered, and/or I know that some of my dining companions are on a much tighter budget than I am. I'd be absolutely mortified if any of those people had to support my extravagance through an even split of the check. It would take all of the fun out of it for me. I just don't understand why anyone would insist, when they know that it means that friends on a tight budget are taking a hit. I really don't get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

[Anonymous]

We split checks evenly when going out with our regular group. Everyone orders more or less the same or it evens out the next time.
If I only had a salad and water and you want to divide evenly after soup to nuts and 4 cocktails that will be the last dinner I'd have with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously. I went to a bday party dinner and ordered a salad and one glass of wine because I'm broke. Everyone else had steaks and millions of glasses of wine. My share of the bill was $225. I was so mad.

I'm in the almost always split evenly camp but for this particular situation I would have had no problem at all if you had said "Hey, I just had the salad and the one $8 Chardonnay so here's forty bucks" or whatever. Surely people noticed that you ate/drank hardly anything. But if it's a birthday dinner and all of you are treating the birthday person, you need to pay your share of his/her meal as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

Lobbyists, lawyers, hedge fund managers, traders, surgeons, sales people, executives can all earn high six figures or seven figures.

We had a family friend who had a newspaper stand who earned about 400k. You would be surprised at how much people who own multiple franchises earn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

Lobbyists, lawyers, hedge fund managers, traders, surgeons, sales people, executives can all earn high six figures or seven figures.

We had a family friend who had a newspaper stand who earned about 400k. You would be surprised at how much people who own multiple franchises earn.

I agree with you -- the money IS out there. But there is a reason that those income ranges are the top 1% or top 0.5% nationally -- it's actual statistic, not something we just say. So all I'm saying is that with the number of people on DCUM consistently claiming to be at $1 million or $800k or whatever, it would require that every 0.5%-er in the country is on DCUM every day on the Money forum or the parenting forums or whatever. Seems unlikely bc not all of those 0.5%ers live in DC or even on the east coast and you'd think at least some of them have something better to do -- work; vacation; shop, whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're going out with new people, and you haven't discussed it before, it's rude to assume they'll be willing to subsidize your meal if you didn't order the same things. It's ruder still to act like THEY are gauche for assuming there would be separate checks c

Totally agree. Some people have money but no class...and that's if these jokers are actually millionaires. If I had a dime for each time someone on DCUM says "we have a seven figure income..."

Why would anyone lie about this on DCUM?

We used to have a 500k income. Then it became 500-800k depending on bonus. Now it is around $1.1-1.4 million.

A few years ago, I wrote we had a $500k+ HHI and random people would accuse this was an exaggeration.

I'm from NYC. I don't feel like we make a ton of money relative to our NYC counterparts. I also don't feel rich because rich people have trust funds.

Not saying YOU are lying but people lie about income all the time. Why they do it -- I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. Why do I think they're lying -- well bc the sheer number of people on here claiming to be at 500k or 1.5 million just do not align with the number of people in the country at those income levels; it would mean that those 0.5%-ers and higher are ALL on DCUM -- each and every one of them have NOTHING better to do wherever they live in the country whether Manhattan or Hollywood than to come to DCUM and talk about splitting the dinner bill. Something doesn't add up . . . .

Something doesn't add up, because most jobs don't pay seven figures, or even in the high six figures.

I think people lie about their income on here all the time.

Lobbyists, lawyers, hedge fund managers, traders, surgeons, sales people, executives can all earn high six figures or seven figures.

We had a family friend who had a newspaper stand who earned about 400k. You would be surprised at how much people who own multiple franchises earn.

In certain parts of the US, maybe. I am not sure some of those careers pay that well in DC. Of course, this site brings people from all over the US.