Serious question for strenuous anti CIO advocates

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was right outside the shower in the rock and play and I would reach out to rock her and was talking to her but honestly that just made the shower longer trying to go between soap and reaching out to rock her. I feel like real life just seems to make it impossible to never have your baby cry on their own for a bit.

So basically you finished your shower instead of just rinsing and getting out? It is a four week old. I hate to dog pile but you sound heartless. You let your baby cry for 20 minutes unnecessarily at that age. Traffic is a necessary evil. Baby has to get do doc appts, etc. But just so you can shower, wash your hair, shave your legs? Really?

[Anonymous]

OP seems like a narcissist. But I doubt any feedback to that end will change her behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was right outside the shower in the rock and play and I would reach out to rock her and was talking to her but honestly that just made the shower longer trying to go between soap and reaching out to rock her. I feel like real life just seems to make it impossible to never have your baby cry on their own for a bit.

So basically you finished your shower instead of just rinsing and getting out? It is a four week old. I hate to dog pile but you sound heartless. You let your baby cry for 20 minutes unnecessarily at that age. Traffic is a necessary evil. Baby has to get do doc appts, etc. But just so you can shower, wash your hair, shave your legs? Really?

So... do you think baby can tell the difference between these two scenarios? I guess you are supposed to be the arbiter of what is necessary and therefore excused?

And don't say you hate to dogpile and then dogpile. Just admit it, you love to dogpile. At this point the dogpile has turned into basically shaming a new mom for ever thinking that maybe EVEN in the first four weeks of having a child she might do something to take care of herself. This is just nonsense, and this type of shaming is exactly what drives people into a PPD. If a fucking 20 minute relaxing shower with the baby in a safe place crying prevents you from being a depressed mom, wtf is wrong with that? Nothing.

This thread has gotten completely completely out of hand. I hope OP doesn't come back and look at it. If you do, OP, learn your lesson about starting threads like this and then go take care of your family as you see fit. Your baby is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was right outside the shower in the rock and play and I would reach out to rock her and was talking to her but honestly that just made the shower longer trying to go between soap and reaching out to rock her. I feel like real life just seems to make it impossible to never have your baby cry on their own for a bit.

So basically you finished your shower instead of just rinsing and getting out? It is a four week old. I hate to dog pile but you sound heartless. You let your baby cry for 20 minutes unnecessarily at that age. Traffic is a necessary evil. Baby has to get do doc appts, etc. But just so you can shower, wash your hair, shave your legs? Really?

So... do you think baby can tell the difference between these two scenarios? I guess you are supposed to be the arbiter of what is necessary and therefore excused?

And don't say you hate to dogpile and then dogpile. Just admit it, you love to dogpile. At this point the dogpile has turned into basically shaming a new mom for ever thinking that maybe EVEN in the first four weeks of having a child she might do something to take care of herself. This is just nonsense, and this type of shaming is exactly what drives people into a PPD. If a fucking 20 minute relaxing shower with the baby in a safe place crying prevents you from being a depressed mom, wtf is wrong with that? Nothing.

This thread has gotten completely completely out of hand. I hope OP doesn't come back and look at it. If you do, OP, learn your lesson about starting threads like this and then go take care of your family as you see fit. Your baby is fine.

++1000. It is so weird how this seems to have hit a nerve with some of the DCUM crazies. Finishing a shower = child abuse?

[Anonymous]

I posted early on and just want to expand on what I said. I have a baby who is a few days shy of four weeks old. I shower every day, it isn't always in the morning and it's always quick. I haven't shaved my legs in two weeks, but I think my babies comfort is worth hairy legs. I usually shower when she is in a food coma, sometimes I have to step out and rock her bouncer or reinsert a paci and even though I love 20 minute showers they are now in the neighborhood of 10 minutes. Yesterday I misjudged how sleepy the baby was and she was having a fussy moment when I was in the shower, so I cut it to 5 minutes and stepped half out three times. No biggie, I got clean and my baby didn't cry needlessly.

My grandma has been over several times and says things like I will have to put the baby down sometime, but she is this little for such a short period of time, why not let her be as comfortable as possible? Also I can't imagine hearing her cry when I can easily stop it. I'm not a "strenuous anti CIO advocate", just a new mom who is doing my best. I hope op grows a heart and her attitude isn't indicative of how she is going to treat her child I. The future, because that could be a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted early on and just want to expand on what I said. I have a baby who is a few days shy of four weeks old. I shower every day, it isn't always in the morning and it's always quick. I haven't shaved my legs in two weeks, but I think my babies comfort is worth hairy legs. I usually shower when she is in a food coma, sometimes I have to step out and rock her bouncer or reinsert a paci and even though I love 20 minute showers they are now in the neighborhood of 10 minutes. Yesterday I misjudged how sleepy the baby was and she was having a fussy moment when I was in the shower, so I cut it to 5 minutes and stepped half out three times. No biggie, I got clean and my baby didn't cry needlessly.

My grandma has been over several times and says things like I will have to put the baby down sometime, but she is this little for such a short period of time, why not let her be as comfortable as possible? Also I can't imagine hearing her cry when I can easily stop it. I'm not a "strenuous anti CIO advocate", just a new mom who is doing my best. I hope op grows a heart and her attitude isn't indicative of how she is going to treat her child I. The future, because that could be a problem.

Honestly, I think that unless OP is taking some of you posters to heart, she is more likely to end up with a stable well adjusted kid than those of you who seriously believe that 20 minutes of crying for a 4 week old is that huge of a deal that you would continue to act so horrible to someone who you know actually DOES have feelings.

I think it's really funny how many people have called OP heartless but should really look in the mirror on that one. OP is just trying to take care of her family. You guys are the heartless ones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, I think that unless OP is taking some of you posters to heart, she is more likely to end up with a stable well adjusted kid than those of you who seriously believe that 20 minutes of crying for a 4 week old is that huge of a deal that you would continue to act so horrible to someone who you know actually DOES have feelings.

I think it's really funny how many people have called OP heartless but should really look in the mirror on that one. OP is just trying to take care of her family. You guys are the heartless ones.

She's trying to take care of her family by taking daily 20-minute "relaxing" showers and leaving her baby to cry while she does housework? OK. It's one thing to do this with a 4-month old. But a tiny infant? Wow at the defenders here. I would also bet money that OP's daily car trips are for more needless "me time" activities like getting mani/pedis and parking her kid in the corner of the nail salon while getting her french tips.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted early on and just want to expand on what I said. I have a baby who is a few days shy of four weeks old. I shower every day, it isn't always in the morning and it's always quick. I haven't shaved my legs in two weeks, but I think my babies comfort is worth hairy legs. I usually shower when she is in a food coma, sometimes I have to step out and rock her bouncer or reinsert a paci and even though I love 20 minute showers they are now in the neighborhood of 10 minutes. Yesterday I misjudged how sleepy the baby was and she was having a fussy moment when I was in the shower, so I cut it to 5 minutes and stepped half out three times. No biggie, I got clean and my baby didn't cry needlessly.

My grandma has been over several times and says things like I will have to put the baby down sometime, but she is this little for such a short period of time, why not let her be as comfortable as possible? Also I can't imagine hearing her cry when I can easily stop it. I'm not a "strenuous anti CIO advocate", just a new mom who is doing my best. I hope op grows a heart and her attitude isn't indicative of how she is going to treat her child I. The future, because that could be a problem.

I hope you grow a heart! Is it so hard to understand that not everybody is the same? OP never said she ignores her baby. And for what it's worth, it is not healthy or normal to feel so anxious about your newborn that you can't even do basic self-care like take an extra minute in the shower to shave your legs. Your grandmother is right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, I think that unless OP is taking some of you posters to heart, she is more likely to end up with a stable well adjusted kid than those of you who seriously believe that 20 minutes of crying for a 4 week old is that huge of a deal that you would continue to act so horrible to someone who you know actually DOES have feelings.

I think it's really funny how many people have called OP heartless but should really look in the mirror on that one. OP is just trying to take care of her family. You guys are the heartless ones.

She's trying to take care of her family by taking daily 20-minute "relaxing" showers and leaving her baby to cry while she does housework? OK. It's one thing to do this with a 4-month old. But a tiny infant? Wow at the defenders here. I would also bet money that OP's daily car trips are for more needless "me time" activities like getting mani/pedis and parking her kid in the corner of the nail salon while getting her french tips.

Can you even read

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Can you even read

Yes, OP, we can read. We read exactly what you wrote. And the opinions are in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, I think that unless OP is taking some of you posters to heart, she is more likely to end up with a stable well adjusted kid than those of you who seriously believe that 20 minutes of crying for a 4 week old is that huge of a deal that you would continue to act so horrible to someone who you know actually DOES have feelings.

I think it's really funny how many people have called OP heartless but should really look in the mirror on that one. OP is just trying to take care of her family. You guys are the heartless ones.

She's trying to take care of her family by taking daily 20-minute "relaxing" showers and leaving her baby to cry while she does housework? OK. It's one thing to do this with a 4-month old. But a tiny infant? Wow at the defenders here. I would also bet money that OP's daily car trips are for more needless "me time" activities like getting mani/pedis and parking her kid in the corner of the nail salon while getting her french tips.

Can you even read

+1

PP is way too invested in tearing OP down, is completely distorting the actual facts presented, and has started to veer into psycho territory. Leave it alone, PP. You're deranged, and heaven help OP if she listens to you.

[Anonymous]

I wonder how many of these supportive posts are OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how many of these supportive posts are OP

I honestly think OP has left. I have been posting a lot, and am not OP. I'm the PP who asked DCUM to remove the horrific and completely baseless "imagine what it's like..." post.

I am also the PP who called OP out for flame baiting multiple times. In that sense OP got what she deserved - and I hope she learned her lesson for it. But this shit really has crossed a line into insanity. I am quite confident something as traumatizing as what happened to OP's baby in the shower has happened to EVERYBODY'S baby between 0 and 4 weeks. It's not "heartless" to take a whopping 20 minutes for yourself (though that's honestly not what OP even said she did). You guys are just horrible. And there is nothing new to be said on behalf of those who believe it was heartless, so honestly, just quit. This thread should be locked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how many of these supportive posts are OP

I wonder how many of the negative posts are the same over-anxious judgmental reading comprehension impaired PP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how many of these supportive posts are OP

I wonder how many of the negative posts are the same over-anxious judgmental reading comprehension impaired PP

Struck a nerve with you, eh?