Husband doesn’t spend any time with me

[Anonymous]

He works 55-60 hour weeks. So I see him for maybe 30 minutes at the end of a long day where he just wants to be left alone. Friday nights after work he goes drinking with his guy friends. That leaves me only with weekends for alone time. Unless he has scheduled a golf game with his buddies which will eat up most of a Saturday and then he’ll come home and nap. Leaving me only with that evening. Here a friend of his will text him to go to watch a fight. I’ll either go with him or he’ll go by himself and come home at 3:00 am. Sunday he’ll sleep in and then we’ll run errands.

So here I am on another Friday home alone as my husband is out drinking.

I feel so lonely and disconnected from him.

[Anonymous]

I'll ignore how you might have gotten into this situation. I suggest couples therapy to get your expectations in sync. As a guy I expect this might be ignorance on his part and that he can be much more flexible with his time.

[Anonymous]

What does he say when you bring it up?

[Anonymous]

Do you have children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have children?

No. Newly weds.

I understand he needs to blow off steam and hangout with friends but it hurts me when he chooses to have time with his friends over me.

[Anonymous]

How come being with you isn't how he unwinds and relaxes? That's what would hurt my feelings most.

[Anonymous]

Start going out and explore interests of your own. Why stay home alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How come being with you isn't how he unwinds and relaxes? That's what would hurt my feelings most.

This is exactly why I’m hurt .

[Anonymous]

Well he sounds like a bro. Sadly you married him. Were you all about the wedding and it would work itself out? Did you live together before marriage? You tell him how you feel. If he does not respect you than divorce. Live and learn. A one off wedding in the grand scheme of things is NOT the end of the world. PS DO NOT GET PREGNANT. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Newlyweds?? Get a divorce. No kids ever with this man if you stick with this BS. He isn’t changing for you, right? You know this, but may not want to believe it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have children?

No. Newly weds.

I understand he needs to blow off steam and hangout with friends but it hurts me when he chooses to have time with his friends over me.

Did you sign a prenup?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start going out and explore interests of your own. Why stay home alone?

Maybe you’ll make new friends who might become...who knows...your next caring husband.

[Anonymous]

You need to fill the time with a lover. A lovah.

[Anonymous]

This is not one of those "well you married him " posts, but what changed?

Did he get a new job or promotion?
Did you used to accompany him on these activities?
What was it like when you were dating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He works 55-60 hour weeks. So I see him for maybe 30 minutes at the end of a long day where he just wants to be left alone. Friday nights after work he goes drinking with his guy friends. That leaves me only with weekends for alone time. Unless he has scheduled a golf game with his buddies which will eat up most of a Saturday and then he’ll come home and nap. Leaving me only with that evening. Here a friend of his will text him to go to watch a fight. I’ll either go with him or he’ll go by himself and come home at 3:00 am. Sunday he’ll sleep in and then we’ll run errands.

So here I am on another Friday home alone as my husband is out drinking.

I feel so lonely and disconnected from him.

I had one of these. This behavior was followed by multiple affairs and divorce. If you want to stay married, figure out what's going on, asap. People who don't spend time together either take one another for granted, or don't like one another.