Does it bother any of you when your children go into your master bathroom

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a house with only one bathroom, so of course we all shared. But I don't remember going into my parent's bedroom unless it was to talk to them. Why else would I need anything from their room? DH was the same way.

Now we have declared the entire basement of our house a kid free zone. The kids are not to go down there unless invited. There is nothing to entice them to go down their either, it is our bedroom, the guest bedroom/office, bathroom, and small tv area. It is nice to have our own space that we can relax in and not worry about child proofing or noise after the kids go to sleep.

Boundaries are healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It bugs me when our middle school son uses our bathroom because he leaves the seat up. For this reason, I have told him he can't use ours. He and his sister have their own bathroom.

--lesbian mom

Why is your sexual orientation revlevent?

Because he's the only dude in the house.

I have a husband and two sons and I am the only woman in my house. And?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We only have one bathroom.

Us, too. Yay!--we are not alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a great book published in the US about how the "McMansionisation" - even small scale - of the American family has led to a sense of dislocation, disassociation and disappointment on the part of kids. Kids with access to computers and TVs which compensate for a lack engagement with their families who are busy providing but not listening. Mom's successful, Dad works all hours. For what? Own room. Own bathroom. Own issues. Good college, cosmetically-sound resume and everyone's happy. Or are they?

When I was growing up we had to litigate access to the bathroom and argue about what to watch on TV. Both my parents worked - including my dad who was a prominent surgeon on call a lot - but there was never a time when we didn't have family dinner when we were all at home and my parents lived in a modest house where we just jumbled around each other.

OP's post strikes me as articulating affront because a child uses "her" space. Crossing the line. Encroaching on her facility. I find this incredibly sad. She doesn't ask why the child wants to be in her space or whether it's normal for her to want her kids to stay the hell out of her territory because she assumes they have no right to use her stuff - like someone at the office who is trying to outrank her. It's desperately dismal and such a horrid indictment on some American families. Where did the love, humor, fun and engagement go?

Here's my advice to OP - keep a packet of cards in your pocket. And next time your D(?)C annoys you, play a game. On the stairs or at the kitchen table. There's loads which don't involve screens. And while you're playing and spending some time, ask about friends, tensions, why your bathroom is coveted. It's mazing what you find out when you engage.

This is one of the most depressing posts I've ever read on DCUM

Love this. Thanks for taking the time to write an intelligent response - rare to see on here.

So those of us who value space for ourselves are not writing intelligent responses? A different perspective is indicative of lack of intelligence?

DH, DS, and I live in an 1800ft Cape Cod, 3br, 2ba. I lived in a 2br, 1ba apartment until college with two older brothers and both parents. I didn't get my own room until my oldest brother moved out at 18 and my middle brother moved to the day bed in the dining room, when he was in 10th grade and I was in 9th. I hated sharing a bathroom with 4 other people. Even when my brother slept in another room
(poor guy had NO privacy) he had to store his stuff in mine so it was never truly my own.

We have only one TV, and we never plan to have DS have his own TV or laptop in his room. We do things as a family. But out master bathroom is just for grownups. That is not unintelligent and we aren't McMansionized.