Where to store alcohol in a home with teens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You could examine your alcohol consumption and assess whether you've had enough. Kids follow your example, so of course they're going to drink if you drink and smoke if you smoke. I have a dry house -always have. That shit is poison, which sickens you, increases cancer risk, makes you lose inhibitions, makes you look and smell like shit and does nothing good for you.

I grew up in a dry house and both of my brothers and I all ended up with alcohol use disorder. I’m in recovery now, but my parents not having it in the house didn’t do anything.

Did they ever talk about it? Did you have familt members with problems?

[Anonymous]

I locked it up when I had teens because I don’t think one of my sons had the ability to say no if pressured.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our alcohol sits out like a [b]normal family. [i]We do keep the weed locked up though!

There's nothing normal aboit having alcohol out in the open in your home. It may be typical or common, but it is not normal.

Those words all mean the same thing LOL.

The connotations are not the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You could examine your alcohol consumption and assess whether you've had enough. Kids follow your example, so of course they're going to drink if you drink and smoke if you smoke. I have a dry house -always have. That shit is poison, which sickens you, increases cancer risk, makes you lose inhibitions, makes you look and smell like shit and does nothing good for you.

I grew up in a dry house and both of my brothers and I all ended up with alcohol use disorder. I’m in recovery now, but my parents not having it in the house didn’t do anything.

I grew up in a functional alcoholic umc house, ala dcum, and I do not drink, nor do any of my siblings. I do not have alcohol in my home. My children are aware of the family history of alcoholism on both sides. This is an ongoing conversation. If they choose to consume alcohol before the age of majority, they will face whatever legal, health, social, safety or familial consequences which follow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You could examine your alcohol consumption and assess whether you've had enough. Kids follow your example, so of course they're going to drink if you drink and smoke if you smoke. I have a dry house -always have. That shit is poison, which sickens you, increases cancer risk, makes you lose inhibitions, makes you look and smell like shit and does nothing good for you.

I grew up in a dry house and both of my brothers and I all ended up with alcohol use disorder. I’m in recovery now, but my parents not having it in the house didn’t do anything.

Did they ever talk about it? Did you have familt members with problems?

Yes, my mother warned us, it does run on both sides of the family, but ultimately we had to learn on our own. One brother didn’t even start drinking until he was older than 21.

I think all parents should discuss healthy versus unhealthy drinking with their kids, plus share any pertinent family history. But it’s naive to think we can ultimately control these outcomes. I have friends in recovery that came from all sorts of backgrounds.

My own DS doesn’t drink, he has tried it but seems to have an allergy (swollen lips and now has an epipen), but he does know he can call on me for a ride if he’s ever in a situation where he needs one.

[Anonymous]

In your belly

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Locking up alcohol as if it were a gun is insane. Try parenting instead.

This- the problem is not the alcohol

Even the best kids will experiment no matter how good the parenting is. My friends and I did it. Hide it, lock it up.

Actually not true, at least not these days. Lots of kids want nothing to do with alcohol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a locked cabinet.

+1
All hard liquor is stored in locked bar cabinet.

We usually have beers and wine in a frig, and keep an eye on it. They are not trying to clean that out right in front of me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our alcohol sits out like a [b]normal family. [i]We do keep the weed locked up though!

There's nothing normal aboit having alcohol out in the open in your home. It may be typical or common, but it is not normal.

Those words all mean the same thing LOL.

The connotations are not the same.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Locking up alcohol as if it were a gun is insane. Try parenting instead.

+1000

If I cannot trust the kids my kids are hanging out with, then it's time to have a serious discussion with my kids. I'm not going to live my life with locking up my medications or alcohol.

FYI--my teens never drank until college (unless we supplied it with a drink here or there and we were around). None of their friends every stole alcohol from us, and it would have been easy. We have a fully stocked bar with high end liquor and 500+ bottles of wine.
Now one kid had a friend who drank in HS, and my kid just didn't go to parties with them. But that kid knew not to steal at our house, and he spent plenty of time in our basement.
Possible that he didn't take from us because his parents supplied it for him at their house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You could examine your alcohol consumption and assess whether you've had enough. Kids follow your example, so of course they're going to drink if you drink and smoke if you smoke. I have a dry house -always have. That shit is poison, which sickens you, increases cancer risk, makes you lose inhibitions, makes you look and smell like shit and does nothing good for you.

BS---we have a fully stocked bar (better than most high end hotels) and 500+ bottles of wine. Our kids never drank from our collection, neither did their friends. It's all about trust. Both kids were largely friends with people who didn't drink in HS (and yes they had many friends). It's not a given that smart, friendly, outgoing HS students all drink.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Locking up alcohol as if it were a gun is insane. Try parenting instead.

It is parenting you twit

If you cannot trust your teens to not drink alcohol in your house (or their friends), then you have much bigger issues with your parenting. How will you trust them to drive a car? So I hope you don't ever plan to let them drive until they are 22 and out of your house after college. because you apparently cannot trust them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Locking up alcohol as if it were a gun is insane. Try parenting instead.

100% this. We lock nothing. Our kids made it to become functioning adults.

Not the PP but guess what, we are a house that hosts all of the time. Sleepovers, bbq's, 10 kids over on a Friday night, team dinners, etc...

It is my responsibility as a parent to not allow any access to alcohol to anyone underage, just the same if I had a gun (which we don't.) That also takes off any pressure my teens may have to "parent" their friends who may want to make a wrong decision.

Sounds like you had introverted teens and you never had anyone else over.

Nope, my house was "the house" with 5-7 kids most weekend nights.
We just knew our kid's friends and our kid and trusted them. None of them drank until college, unless parents offered them something (we entertain a lot and by 15/16, we would allow our kids a cocktail or rose if they wanted)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our alcohol sits out like a [b]normal family. [i]We do keep the weed locked up though!

There's nothing normal aboit having alcohol out in the open in your home. It may be typical or common, but it is not normal.

It's called a bar area. We have a specific section of the kitchen designed for entertaining, and all the liquor is there, along with 50 bottles of wine. The rest of the wine is down the hall in wine cellars. Some sits out, others are in pull out liquor cabinets so it's easily accessible when we entertain, or just want to make a drink ourselves.

It is totally normal to not hide your alcohol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Locking up alcohol as if it were a gun is insane. Try parenting instead.

100% this. We lock nothing. Our kids made it to become functioning adults.

Not the PP but guess what, we are a house that hosts all of the time. Sleepovers, bbq's, 10 kids over on a Friday night, team dinners, etc...

It is my responsibility as a parent to not allow any access to alcohol to anyone underage, just the same if I had a gun (which we don't.) That also takes off any pressure my teens may have to "parent" their friends who may want to make a wrong decision.

Sounds like you had introverted teens and you never had anyone else over.

This. My son and his friends had free rein of the basement until he went to college. Part of being able to allow that was keeping DH's poker night alcohol locked up. I wasn't really concerned that my son or his core group of friends would drink then, but sometimes there were new kids who came to hang out. And you never really know.

Also, I'm guessing a lot of the responders don't have kids in college yet. You would be amazed at the attitude shift in teens once they spend a semester at college where drinking and drugs are common place. My son is now a college sophomore and we're actually more concerned about potential drinking now than before because it seems like many of his friends just assume it's ok now since they've been at school (and many of them are 20). Not only is everything locked up but we've made it clear that they are not allowed to BYOB and we're considering increasing our supervision depending on who is over (e.g., popping down to say hi and look at what they are drinking). I actually wouldn't care if my 20 y/o son wanted to drink a beer while hanging out with family, but am not ok with taking on the responsibility of implicitly allowing under age drinking in my home.

Many of you who keep alcohol accessible need to consider what your liability would be if a teen drinks at your house and then gets in an accident. I am rolling my eyes so hard at "we have trust instead of locks". These are teenagers and they are playing you. Get a grip on reality.

We actually knew all of our kid's friends. Oldest: Had one good friend who drank in HS and went to parties like that. We knew that, kid knew that, my kid just didn't go to those parties. That kid never took alcohol at our house because he knew we didn't allow the teens to drink at our home. All of the other friends didn't drink in HS. College was a different story, but even then, they know not to drink at our home until they were 21 or if we approved it at 19/20 and were home. They would only have 1-2 beers each.

Other kid--never went to parties in HS that involved drugs/alcohol. None of their friends did either. My kid was very social, just 1 tier below the "really popular crowd" at school. They were part of the really smart kids who were also popular crowd. None of their good friends went to parties like that. Sure they knew kids who did, but they didn't typically hang out with those kids at parties or at our home, they only hung with those kids at the movies/dinner/etc and never let them drive them around.

Once again, college is very different. 2nd kid learned to drink fall of freshman year college. They do it safely and with friends and we trust them. They don't get trashed 5 nights of the week, they really don't get trashed, but they do go to frat parties/house parties and drink.

So yes, I am 100% certain none of my kid's had friends stealing alcohol at our house while they were teens. Because my kid's have told me and I trust them. My kid's tell me when their friends did drink and go to parties.